I am haveing a issue with a friend

United States
March 6, 2009 7:58am CST
someone help there is just new friend of mine that loves to go out of town on the weekends in party.She has no kids how can i tell her in a way that want hurt her that i can't go i am a single mom that her father id not in her life. And the babbysiter just want watch for a full weekend .
1 person likes this
5 responses
• Philippines
6 Mar 09
Well, I think there is no better way than to tell her straightforward. I mean, if she's a true friend, she'll understand it. Of course, it's more important to take care of your kid than to go out on a party. I'm sure there's some more opportunities that you guys could get together. Just tell her that you can't go because you have to take care of your kid and hope that she'll understand it, and you guys could go some other time. Good luck
@buggles64 (2715)
• United States
6 Mar 09
A true friend will understand that you have responsibilities and your kids are your first priority. Maybe the two of you could do something in your home, so you don't have to take the kids out. Also, I would just be upfront about not being able to go with her, and that you would really rather stay home with the kids. She will understand. And then maybe she could help you find a sitter to watch the kids if it is really important for her that you go out of town for the weekend. Two heads are usually better than one.
1 person likes this
• United States
7 Mar 09
Becoming a parent brings on new responsibilities. Sounds like a part of you doesn't want let go and maybe go with her. And then another part sounds like you realize that it's time to move on, but you don't want to hurt her. If she's a real friend I think she'll understand where you're coming from about not being able to go out of town with her. If she gets upset then maybe she's being a bit selfish on her part. Take in mind what your child would think of this, too. Last thing, what's more important, partying or parenting? Not saying you have to sever ties or give everything up, just realize there's a time for everything.
• United States
6 Mar 09
I think you just need to be honest. Tell her you'd love to go but can't afford the sitter, the father is a dud, and you have no relatives. If she is a good friend she'll understand and perhaps come up with other opportunities for you two to hang together. In the meantime, you may want to start making friends with mommies. No offense against single friends, but remember what it was like when you were single? You didn't want to hang with the kiddos, you wanted to have fun. You might also wish to start creating a network of babysitters so you can enjoy a night out now and then. We mommies need our time alone away from kids, because if we're not happy, ain't nobody happy. Blessings-Anora
@katsalot1 (1619)
6 Mar 09
I don't think you should worry about hurting your friend's feelings. It really is up to her to understand your situation, I think your children are a lot more important than a new friend. If she has a problem with this, then she is not a friend at all.