Are You gonna Stay with the one who loves you, or with the one you love.
• United States
18 Mar 09
This is a very hard question.... I do not believe either is a good choice though. I was engaged to a guy for 2 years that was madly in love with me. He was the sweetest thing ever. Would do anything I asked of him and even things I did not ask. He was literally the perfect guy that girls talk about when they mention "dream guy". He was smart, funny, attractive... you get the picture. The only problem was, I didn't love him. I wanted to but couldn't. He was perfect... just not perfect for me. It was unfair to him to keep the relationship going, he has so much love to offer, he should offer to someone who could return it to him.... As far as being with someone that you love... Love cannot be a one way street unless you feel like you are strong enough to produce enough love for the both of you...which is very tiring... possible but tiring. The best thing is to find someone that loves you.... and you can learn to love them in return... If you can't learn to love them... than find someone you can.
8 Mar 09
Well for me I would stay for were I would feel I would happider in life. I cannot just say which one of them since I am not in her shoes right now and i do not feel how she feels for one and the other person. So try asking her which is the person that will make her happy to be with and make the decision soon so the person he is with now will be given time to also move on with his life or just be happy with life with her.
7 Mar 09
It depends on the personality of your friend. If she is the "martyr" type, she is okay being the only one trying to make the relationship work. The danger however is she might get burned out, sooner or later, and it might be very difficult to start anew. If I were in that situation (thank God we both love each other) I would choose the person who loves me. In time I know that I'd love him, too, because of the care and love that he shows. If she is smart however she will realize soon that loving herself first is the key. "Begging" to be loved in return just isn't healthy. Better to start on a workable relationship. The sooner the better.
7 Mar 09
the classic question. haha. ive tried both. when i stayed with the one i love, i felt that i am just the one making efforts to make things work, when i stayed with the one who loves me, i felt untrue to myself and to him. eventually, i did not enjoy his company when the newness wore off. eventually, i chose someone who loves me and whom i love, and i decided that this is the right way of having a fair and healthy relationship. aside from the bliss it brings, its way, way better than a one-sided relationship.