Is it the cheating or the lying?

Thanks for your responnse. I agree , once a liar Always a liar. when you Know he lies then iy is so much easier to deal with him. take care.

Once a liar always a liar!! I say, "leopards do not change their spots, they get a marker and connect the dots!!!!!" In otherwords they are just finding a way to do the same thing over and over with new lies and ways of doing them. My ex did this and men are creatures of habbit. He went to the same places and even used the same parking spaces as we did, how idotic is that. The cheating hurts and it can be forgiven and gotten over, albeit a hard thing to do but the lies, forget it. I never knew afterwards what was going through his head. When we drove to the courthouse for our divorce, when ever he looked at a woman on the sidewalk or in a car next to us I wondered is she your type, what would you do to be with her too?? Basically the trust was gone and with out the trust the rest was over, way over. P.S. When I did catch them, where I knew they would be that day, I told her the next time she was sitting home alone, hearing the same excuses she heard him tell me, which he WILL DO, remember how you made another woman feel and I hope it hurts you 100% more. Now I have a husband who was also done wrong whom I know will never do me wrong and vise versa. Good luck to you, if the lies start get out while you can with your heart and dignity intact. Rosered.

I am so different I find. I would never truist a husband,I would assume he is lying whenever he speaks.But with a hoyfriend, I will trust until he gives me cause not to, and then it would be over.

Thanks. I have always separated the two, To me lying is so much worse.Maybe because I can see cheating or at least having a one night stand but I only lie to keep a surprise present under wraps.

To me , it would be the lying.I have no tolerance for liars.

I am so sorry. I want to thank you for responding to this post.I can't imagine how hurt you most be. it is totally different to not suspect a thing . When I thouhjt of this post, I was thinking of the partner who feels something is wrong and then finds out.Thanks again . Take Care.

I agree. There are times when you can't resist and a one night stand happens . But to lie about it is worse. A one time thing can be forgiven but to lie and lie about it can't.Or if your steady falls for someone else , then he/she Needs to tell you so you can let them go and be happy.