Special needs siblings

Respite care is available in our area. We do not use this service. I do understand what you are saying, but I am not comfortable sending my son anywhere with strangers and I would really not allow them to take him over night. That is just not an option for us. I know it may be irrational, but I am not comfortable leaving my child in the care of people I do not know. Also, I work with special needs children everyday and have seen some very irresponsible people providing this type of care, I have seen good ones as well but the good ones are much more rare than the bad. A lot of the ones I have seen are not trained well and I am just not comfortable with the system. Also, I have seen the facilities that the children stay in when they are in respite care for extended amounts of time, They try to make them somewhat homey but they are still like being in a hospital. They are cold and efficient places and it is not the environment I want my child in. This is just not a viable option for us, but I do appreciate the response.

As I was reading your comment, I can relate to what you were saying. My children don't have a disability but when I put my first born into child care, I was really worried about who was looking after my baby. So what I did one day, I took time off work and stayed with the child care all day to see how it was run. It was the best thing I ever did. I was more relaxed after that. I also kepting communicating with the staff. Especially the director of the child care. There was a couple of things happened. while my first born was there. He was attacked by an older child. The director pulled me aside before I saw my son and told me what happened and what they did with that child that attacked all the little ones. The attacker child was not allowed to return to the child care where my son attended. 2 other babies were attacked. When I saw them, I thanked my lucky stars that my son was not as bad as these other babies. The other thing that happened was when I picked up my son one day from child care, he was getting restless in the pram. So I took him out. He settled and put him back in the pram. This happened a number of times. I asked the director does any of the staff pick him up at any time. She said yes. I asked the director if she could inform staff not to pick up my son all the time. I asked that my son was only to be picked up when needed. Then I informed the director if any of the staff want to spend time with my son, that is ok, but if they could sit down on the floor and play with him instead of picking him up. A request that was granted. After these things, I had no trouble of sending my daughter to the same child care. So really, I would suggest to go and see how things are run. Speak to the staff. All of them from the director to the carer. If there is a new face, speak to them. I know respite and child care are 2 different things but both are resulting in leaving a child in stranger's care. Having 2 healthy children, I have no idea of what it is like to have a child with disablity. But I do see my friend and how tired she gets when looking after her child with disability and then looking after 3 healthy children on top of all that. My heart does go out to you even though I don't understand. I would like to give you a big hug for all of your achievements if you were close by. My shoulder is there for you even though we are so far appart in this world. But always remember this, you are never alone. There is always a friend out there if you need it.

These are all very good suggestions. Thank you very much for responding. We do Mother/daughter days on occassion, but maybe we will try to make them a regular thing. I really like that idea. She also loves to cook so maybe I will have her help me with dinner a couple times a week so that we can bond. Really great suggestions, thank you!