When you see a mixed couple, does it bother you? Why or why not?

@tdemex (3547)
United States
April 23, 2009 8:16am CST
I'm an older white male, and married to a Mexican national. We live in Mexico and there's no problems there as far as our acceptance goes, but when we go to the USA we seem to get more second looks from people or double takes. I know she's attractive but I don't think that's the reason. LOL! Do you have any problems with mixed couples? Why? Why not?
17 people like this
65 responses
@Ldyjarhead (10161)
• United States
23 Apr 09
Doesn't bother me any, color or nationality shouldn't be an issue (and it wouldn't be, in a perfect world). As long as they care about each other and are ready to deal with any issues that may come up with their children, I say to heck with what anyone else thinks. They need to know ahead of time that their children are likely to be harassed and know how they'll deal with it.
3 people like this
@tdemex (3547)
• United States
23 Apr 09
Sad but true, in the USA anyway! Thanks. tdemex
2 people like this
@Lxandra79 (1536)
• United States
23 Apr 09
Yes this is tru! My bf wants us to have kids, and he told me that our kids are not gonna get accepted from hispanics or blacks. But they are goin to have a loving family to LOVE them no matter what!
2 people like this
@Ldyjarhead (10161)
• United States
23 Apr 09
And just to make sure you understand my comment, 'I' don't have a problem with children of mixed parentage (I don't use the word 'race', because aren't we all considered one race - human?), just being realistic knowing that others DO have a problem and children WILL suffer. Best to know ahead of time how you'll deal with it so that you can prepare the children and maybe even teach the rest of the world a thing or two.
2 people like this
@laedyan (192)
• Philippines
23 Apr 09
Hello there tdemex. I tend to have a second look when i see mixed couple. Many people do this kind since they are curious what the couple came from or one of the couple especially if its not from thesame country. I guess its natural because we have the curiosity to find something when we see a different one from our sights. Just let them stare at you and be glad that they noticed you,atleast you didn't do anything bad to them. :-) Happy mylotting.
@Ravenladyj (22992)
• United States
23 Apr 09
I guess its natural because we have the curiosity to find something when we see a different one from our sights In this day an age though it SHOULDNT still be a natural reaction....not in North America at least....I mean when I was concieved that was one thing since it was still very much taboo (I was born in 1970 and inter-racial marriages only became legal the yr before my birth) but I mean this is 2009 ya know...ppl should have long since been accepting of it by now and SEEING mixed couples should be natural rather than double taking them if that makes sense
3 people like this
@tdemex (3547)
• United States
23 Apr 09
Point taken, laedyan We do take it with a grain of salt, but we're much more comfortable while in Mexico! Thanks T----
2 people like this
@Ravenladyj (22992)
• United States
23 Apr 09
LOL I went and still go through that when I'm out with my husband since moving here to the U.S....I'm mixed (Jamaican and Polish) and my husband is white...Back in Canada its not an issue at all but when I moved the kids here I warned my hubby that it would happen (the glares, double takes etc) and sure enough it did and still does....I'll never understand it in all honesty but being from Canada it was never an issue ya know...ppl need to come out of the dark ages as far as I'm concerned and oddly enough it seems to be the biggest issue here in the U.S...Even when we go to Jamaica its not an issue..Mind you if we were to go into the heart of the city it might be with some ppl but anywhere we've been there it was never a problem....
3 people like this
@tdemex (3547)
• United States
23 Apr 09
Great response I agree 100%, But I wasn't always this way, being old, and growing up in the white suburbs of metro Detroit, I used to have issues with it! Wow it's great to grow old and mellow out! LOL! T-----
2 people like this
@TLChimes (4845)
• United States
23 Apr 09
Don't come back to Detroit now... things have flip flopped and now it's hard being a white couple or a white kid. Mixed seems to be ok. You're right... time to come out of the dark ages and realize that we are all who we are and color isn't an issue. Sad to say it won't happen here anytime soon.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
23 Apr 09
Me and my bf boyfriend are also a mixed couple. I don't have any problems if I see another mixed couple. I think others try to look at some mixed couple when the two of them has a big age gap thats why. Me and my bf are in the same age, others also look at us because of our skin color but they always say that I am lucky with my bf. My bf will reply them that he is also lucky to have me in his life. Everybody thinks differently so most of the people looking at you have different comments as well. Just don't mind them as long they don't interfere your life, you and your wife will be fine.
3 people like this
@tdemex (3547)
• United States
23 Apr 09
We are close to the same age, but I'm a lot taller than she is, but love is blind! We've been together for 10 yrs. and very happy! Thanks for your response! tdemex
2 people like this
@cvodrey (228)
• United States
23 Apr 09
I have no problem with mixed couples. In fact, it makes me happy to see people of other nationalities together. It shows that we are progressing. Love knows no color.
2 people like this
@tdemex (3547)
• United States
23 Apr 09
That's a fact, wish there were more of you out there! t----
1 person likes this
@laglen (19783)
• United States
23 Apr 09
I have no problem with mixed couples. I really do not see how it could affect me. If people payed more attention to their own house, they wouldn't have to worry about others! More power to you. If you are both happy, then I wish you well. So many people with their own race or religion are so unhappy. I think that if you can find happiness, I am happy for you!
@tdemex (3547)
• United States
23 Apr 09
Hey laglen thanks for your support! May be in a couple thousand years, if they make it that long, there will be 1 race and the problem will be gone from here! One can only hope. t-----
1 person likes this
@deejean06 (1953)
• United States
23 Apr 09
Hi tdemex...The only thing that's important here is whether or not the two of you love each other. It's none of my business who you want to marry just as it's none of your business who I married. So as long as you and your wife love each other who gives a crap what other people think? I'm so tired of people just judging by looks - you shouldn't either.
@tdemex (3547)
• United States
23 Apr 09
That's very true, however it gets old after awhile. You know, you try to pretend people aren't judging you on race, but it's always there in the back of your mind. That's why I say we're a lot more comfortable in Mexico, what's really funny is people are always asking me why we don't move back up here to the states! LOL! I always tell them I like Mexico better, have gotten plenty of puzzled looks for that remark! Have a good one and thanks! t-----
1 person likes this
@Lxandra79 (1536)
• United States
23 Apr 09
I dont have a problem at all! Im Peruvian and my bf is Black American. He told me that black girls dont like light skinned girls or latinas, just cuz black guys prefer us (some black guys). So that said, from then on...I have noticed that when we go out we or I get stared at alot (I didnt notice this before tho). So when he wanted me to meet his Fam I was kinda nervous! But they are the sweetest Fam, so not all are racist.
@tdemex (3547)
• United States
23 Apr 09
I agree and thank God for the color blind people on this planet we all share! Good Luck to you! t----
2 people like this
@Bryanx54 (644)
25 Apr 09
Me and my girlfriend are a Mixed to couple i am a English and she is Italian and we have been happily in relationship for 7 months now and are now just recently engaged and i personally think that mixed raced couples are beautiful as it shows much more love between world itself and i love my Girlfriend soo much and we get some second looks too but we dont really care as it is only a handful of people and we still go strong so yes i totally agree with mixed race relationships and i'm glad about your 10 years together with your Wife god bless! Very good topic it reminded me of mine and my Fiancee's Relationship thanks for this topic!! :)
2 people like this
@cortney09 (1348)
• United States
25 Apr 09
I don't have a problem with it. I figure if you love someone it doesn't matter what they look like. I know that there are people who have all different kinds of opinions on this, but that's just mine.
2 people like this
@Crysi23 (515)
• United States
24 Apr 09
It doesn't bother me to see it because I know its a very common trend now a days. Plus I have a friend that lives in Thailand that is married to an Australian. But over here in the U.S I see white and Blacks together and American's with Asian's my point is. We are all human ethicinity doesn't make a person. If you love here that's all that matter shouldn't think what other people think of you.
@bhanusb (5709)
• India
24 Apr 09
I'm a brown man and married.I have no problem with mixed couple.Our boys go to US,Canada,UK and other European countries.Some of them return home with their white wives.Many white girls can adjust themselves with their husbands family.The families also take the white bride easily.But some white girls could not adjust with this country and with husband's family.They go back to their country.So the problems are of the whites.
• United States
26 Apr 09
Absolutly not! I think it is great. in fact if I saw you and your lovely wife walk by and I got to caught your oe her eye I would say hello. Love comes in every color. And anyone who voted for Obama should feel the same. If it weren't for a mixed couple, we wouldn't have a president. Take Care and say hello to your wife for me.
1 person likes this
@tdemex (3547)
• United States
30 Apr 09
Thanks Sarah, I'd say "hi" back at ya! I can't believe the number of people that responded to this post 69, and only 1 negative comment, the times are a changing, for the better! tdemex
1 person likes this
• United States
1 May 09
That is fantastic.take care.
• United States
23 Apr 09
yes it does i belive that we are to stick with our own race
1 person likes this
@tdemex (3547)
• United States
23 Apr 09
Why?
1 person likes this
• United States
21 Jun 09
Its already to late for that. Everyone is mixed somehow. Im white but I have Irish, diffrent kinds of indian and dutch. My husband is dutch and indian.My Granny is 2 diffrent kinds of Indian and my papaw is irish and dutch. So I dont see how people can say anything about mixed races because the person that doesnt agree with it is probably got diffrent races in them. People just look at skin color. So they just look stupid when they look down on it because they are most likely mixed with something. I dont think there are many straight full races anymore. But just ignore them. As long as you are happy and in love that is all that counts.
@bellis716 (4807)
• United States
25 Apr 09
I am an older white female and have had to become accustomed to seeing interracial couples. At first, it was difficult because I was brought up under segregation. After the military desegregated their ranks, things began to change rapidly. I doubt that you and your wife would receive a second look here in the San Antonio area where the military has such a prominent place, and Spanish is spoken as frequently as English.
1 person likes this
@tdemex (3547)
• United States
30 Apr 09
Your right we've gone to San Antonio many times and are very comfortable there! Thanks for the response. I posted this same question a year ago and got 4 responses, this time I've got 69 and am overwhelmed? Go Figure. tdemex
@bdugas (3584)
• United States
24 Apr 09
It does not bother me, but I have 2 bi racial step grandchildren. And I have seen the hurt they have gone through out in public and in school. There are mean people in this world and always will be. There will always be looks, no matter what. I guess you just learn to ignore them. Long as you are treated will and love each other that is what counts.
1 person likes this
@tdemex (3547)
• United States
24 Apr 09
Ya know it really makes you wonder why the people like that had parents teaching them that way of thinking! Lets hope the future will be kinder to mixed race people! tdemex
@MissAmie (720)
• United States
24 Apr 09
I don't have any problems with any kind of interracial couple except for one type. I'm not sure what my problem is, but when I see an older white male with a younger asian girl I automatically assume that she's controlled by him. My brain tells me this isn't right, but for whatever reason, it just kind of makes me wonder about the nature of their relationship. I hate that I feel that way, but at least I'm honest about it and know that I have a problem. I make a conscious effort not to assume anything about their relationship. Other than that, I really don't look twice at mixed couples.
1 person likes this
@tdemex (3547)
• United States
24 Apr 09
I can understand that, Just think in Alaska not that long ago they had the mail order brides! Makes ya wonder! tdemex
• United States
24 Apr 09
No, I don't have a problem with mixed couples. Honestly I think it is crazy for one to have a problem with mixing nationalities. I respect everyone and their preferences whether it be right or wrong and so should others. Plus their is not one living person in the world... maybe africa but seriously doubt it that is "PURE" 100% their nationality. People need to go back and look at their family tree and go far back and they will see if they have a problem with this they have a problem with themselves.
@tdemex (3547)
• United States
24 Apr 09
Ha! I love it! Thanks for the insite. tdemex
• Philippines
24 Apr 09
when i was young, and when i see a lot of white men with a not so beautiful Asian girl with him, i will wonder why those white guys choose their partner instead of so many beautiful girls out there. that was just the reason i looked at them before, nothing more. now that i am older, i do not care about mixed couples anymore, even if the girl is not that beautiful.they may find something beautiful in that person that i do not see LOL =) and i heard people say some guys like exotic looking girls so just let them be. i was also searching for responses that will say they are bothered because i also want to know why they give second looks to mixed couples in the US, but i did not find any explanation
1 person likes this
@tdemex (3547)
• United States
24 Apr 09
There was one response on the first page. Where the person said the races should only be with each other! Sad but true! Thanks tdemx
@Porcospino (16435)
• Denmark
23 Apr 09
I don't have a problem with mixed couples, not at all. As long as two people love eachother that is the only thing that matters. That is the way I see it, but I know that there are people who disagree. My fiance and I are both white, but I have had African and Asian boyfriends in the past and I know what it is like when people stare. Some people even shouted at us and I have received quite a lot of nasty comments. Unfortuneately there is a lot of racism in my country.
1 person likes this
@tdemex (3547)
• United States
24 Apr 09
What country is that, might I ask? Thanks! tdemex