Love affairs??

China
May 22, 2009 11:06pm CST
Hello mylotters, The other day, our English teacher told us something about her family and the poor relationship between her and her husband. In fact, she has thought of divorcing many times, buy for some complicated reason.... My English teacher is a middle-aged woman who is patient and elegant. To be honest, she is younge than her real age. When i heard of her story, i was really shocked. Because she is good in my eyes. So i want to know whether many couples get married for the wrong reasons, and only find out ten, twenty, or thirty years later that they are incompatible, that they hardly took the time to know each other.
1 person likes this
12 responses
@LeeDaisy (20)
• China
24 May 09
oh,no.I am single,and not familiared with that.And I do not want marriage,that is not trusty.Sometimes I even feel horrible about the marriage.
@trinee (514)
• Trinidad And Tobago
24 May 09
Many people get married for the wrong reasons. Money, physical attraction and security are reasons and then there is the social pressure of not wanting to be alone and getting older without marriage. Once you are married you stay no matter what. Getting to know the person and letting the friendship mature is not guaranteed to make your relationship work but it goes a long way.
@bird123 (10518)
• United States
23 May 09
If your relationship is all roses, YOU PROBABLY HAVE THE WRONG ONE!!! Few things worth while in life come easy. Couples are meant to help each other learn and grow as people. With that comes drama. Every great couple has drama and everyone has wanted to hit the door running. So what does it all mean? Take a few steps back and really look! Is it true love??? If you answer yes, know that true love is worth overcoming a few problems. If you answer no, you know what to do.
@jellymonty (2358)
23 May 09
I believe the majority of divorces today are a result of people rushing into marriage and not taking the time to see what they have signed up to. Its a shame really that people claim that they are in love and years later down the line they hate each other so much to the point where they can't even be in the same room as one another.. Being good does not exempt you for facing trials and problems so as much as your english teacher is a gem, she is afterall human. So my advice to anyone thinking of saying I do.. make sure you have read the fine print and that you understand that you are entering a covenant that is not meant to be broken.. and do take the time to know your potential other half..
@dakiss (181)
• India
23 May 09
love is not affair...its relationship if its affair then its for to satisfy ones desire..
• China
23 May 09
not everytime you'll meet the right person at the right time and place, so when you are about marriage age, under various pressures from your parents, friends and society, you may just pick up the so-called suitable person and hurry into such a relationship. Then subconsciously and gradually consciously you feel he is not the right one, the satisfying one. But you spend so much time thinking about it and hesitating to make a decision, and the baby comes. Then you really get deeply involved and cannot get out easily.
@UK_Shree (3604)
23 May 09
Well yes I am sure there are. But I think many if not most couples take a risk when they get married. It is impossible to know everything about someone before you marry them. Maybe it does take 10, 20 years to know someone properly. Therefore I do not think you can blame anyone for feeling slightly frustrated in a marriage sometimes. I think being in a happy married relationship requires hard work from both parties.
@omiami (412)
• Malta
23 May 09
These things unfortunately happen. I think some get married for the wrong reasons or else they as a couple change by time. Maybe the bond which links them isnt strong enough. Also their might be a loss of communication. There are so many reasons for marraiges that dont work. Some dont work after a year or two while others after a longer time. Sometimes we think we know our husband/wife while in reality we dont know them at all or else simply because the relationship changes. Marriage is always a closed box. You wont know what you will find but you have to try your best.
@dianmelydia (2272)
• Indonesia
23 May 09
I think there's no married couple who never get in a quarrel. Usually they will say about divorce in emotionally. But it should depends on their problem. If one of them flirting, it could be a hard problem. No one wanna be cheated. People usually forget how did they love their couple when they were young. Wrong reason is just a common reason. Nobody's perfect. I think i'd prefer to say it's about fate and destiny. I can't say anything about your English teacher, but it's better don't get bother with other's household problem. It must be more complicated then we thought. Just pray for them for the best result. Have a nice day and happy mylotting.
@loisvite (48)
• Philippines
23 May 09
I'm not sure for the wrong reason. Marriage life has always its ups and downs. Its up to the couple if they want to save their relationship or not. If I could be in that situation I will try all my best to save my marriage especially I have kids, but I can't be forever martyr, If my husband won't cooperate with me, what's the use of saving? The kids will understand anyway.
• United States
23 May 09
You have to realize that it isn't them just not being compatible that makes me divorce decades down the road - instead life becomes different. When you are 40 and you look back on when you were 20 and even 30, your goals, aspirations, ideals, etc. can be a 180 degree difference. And the thing is when those things change they can easily affect your love life as well. People don't stay married just because they love each other they stay married because they are compatible within their financial, family, career, etc. ideal. I was engaged for 2 years and planning on marrying a guy but then he decided he wanted a change in life, went into the Marines, got medically discharged, and decided he was going to work and live the rest of his life back in his home town and not go back to school and I hated where he lived and I needed a city for my career goal and I can't marry someone that doesn't have a higher education so we had to split. The love was still there - but our futures were just too far apart.
• Australia
23 May 09
Sure there are couples who get married for the wrong reasons but most of the time that isn't the case. They don't just find out ten, twenty, whatever years later they are incompatible or hardly took the time to know each other. The fact is, people change, it is a slow and gradual process where the term 'drifting apart' stems from. So by the end they may be incompatible but this was never the case originally, it is a natural process.