Your brother thinks he is...?

India
July 26, 2009 10:51am CST
better than you because his marriage is still together and you are single... He also thinks he is better because he has a bigger college degree than you How would you act when he comes for a visit and starts his bragging?? Ignore it, confront him, or treat him well even if he does not treat you good back.
2 people like this
3 responses
@lawana_f (327)
• United States
26 Jul 09
We all have family members like this. I usually praise them and tell them that I am proud of all they have accomplished. While I am saying this I know in my heart that I am actually happier in many ways than that person is. I am not in debt up to my ears and I may not have as much as they do, but those are things that are not overly important to me. I have my own set of goals and my own standards to live by. I do not let things that others think are important bother me. When I was younger I would have made a few comments that in some way I feel sorry for that person that has to brag about everything they have, something like "You must be very unhappy about your life if all you can do is brag about things you have or have accomplished in the past. I hope in the future you are a happier person", or "How long until you have that car/house/vacation paid off? I enjoy not having to make payments like that." My daughter would say smile in a way that it makes them wonder what you are up to. Some people simply have to brag, others are trying to hid some major problem by doing so. She would wonder if they were really as happy as they seem. My relationship with God is so much more important than the thing most brag about, I might say something about praying for the happiness of the bragger. Now what I should do is actually spend the time I would usually make smart remarks praying for my brother and sincerely being happy for him and what he has without comparing it to my life. Treat him well and be happy for him and his family. Drop the sibling rivilary, if you have to say something then tell him you are happy for him, but life is not a contest and you are not competing with him.
1 person likes this
@Seppy1984 (2148)
• United States
26 Jul 09
To be honest, I would end up telling him to get out and not to return till he could treat me like an adult. I feel that just because someone did something more then another person, it does not make them better then others. In my eye's not every marriage will last, not everyone one is made to have a high degree. Everyone is made differently and that is just fine because it does not make a person better then the other. I have to say that with my hubby and his family they are so different and unique that it is not funny. His sister and brother had been through divorces from their spouses, yet my hubby and I are still together and we don't feel like we are better then them. In fact we still treat them with respect. Plus his sister is 31 and lives at home with the parents and we don't degrade her for it. In fact both my hubby and sister-in-law have furthered their education and they don't degrade their brother because ofit. In fact their brother is very smart so everyone is different. Plus if I was you I would not sweat it because I am sure there is something that is not so peachy king perfect in his life. I wish you the best of luck with dealing with a pain in the butt brother. Happy Mylotting
1 person likes this
@phyrre (2324)
• United States
26 Jul 09
First, I would confront him and tell him that I don't like his bragging and that it's rude to say those things. I'd tell him that he's a guest in my house and I'm going out of my way to welcome him and be polite to him and the least he can do is treat me like an adult and give me the respect I deserve. If he wants to look down on me, he can do it from the doorstep as far as I'm concerned, but when he's under MY roof he needs to hold his tongue a little. I can get that sort of disrespect anywhere, but my house is my sanctuary and I don't want him messing that up. Second, if that doesn't work I think I would politely ask him to leave. Not yelling or getting mad or anything, but just ask him to go because if he can't think of anything nice to say then I don't need his presence in my house. Not that it's ok to do those things anywhere else, either, but especially not if he's a GUEST. That's just two-faced. It's like saying thanks for welcoming me over and by the way I don't really appreciate being here. But I would definitely try talking to him about it and telling him how it makes you feel and asking him to stop doing that. A little sibling rivalry is ok, as long as it's mutual and it's not making one of the siblings feel bad. If he really loves you and cares about you, he'll cut back and stop. If he doesn't then maybe you need to consider if you really need him around anyway.