Do you have someone in your family that you just can not stand to be around,

@celticeagle (106694)
Boise, Idaho
January 15, 2010 4:37pm CST
spend time with, have them influence your kids, or even call 'family'? It's sad isn't it but I bet we all have one. That uncle that burps or farts or aunt that doesn't wash. Well, for me I have my granddaughter back again. I love because, after all, she is my granddaughter BUT, I don't like the way she talks, thinks, acts around my grandson, or the way she treats us. She is very disrespectful and I don't mean just in her behavior but in her actions. She goes against the law and infringes that on us. What is a person to do? Her mom said she could stay. She couldn't very well live on the street? Or could she? Kidding(I think)You animals lovers will appreciate my feelings on this one. It was a week-end about a month ago. She and her boyfriend were here and her mom had gone to spend the week end with her boyfriend. My granddaughter comes and asks me if she can take the cat over to the park and LEAVE IT THERE because it was urinating on the carpet. (This particular day it was 4 degrees outside.)Ofcourse I said no. She and I had words because she felt I didn't care about her because I wouldn't let her take this poor cat out and leave it in frigid weather.(Please note* We did take care of the cat urinated problem) This is just one of many instances we have had with her. I tell you this to let you know alittle of what I put up with in dealing with her. Your thoughts please! And do you have a member(s) of your immediate or extended family that just drive you up a wall with their behaviour or ideosincrecies? How do you act and what do you do?
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9 responses
• United States
15 Jan 10
I do have someone like that. My father's father is very judgmental and he likes to ridicule me for my choices. He finds it irritating that I can live my life in such a free manner when he grew up and raised his family working for the union. I have a very unconventional career that he doesn't approve of. And he refuses to let it go. So the rest of the family must suffer because I will not go to family functions if he is attending. I also have a cousin (Teenage Girl) that doesn't respect adults, the law, or really anyone in general. She has a mouth that constantly spews curse words and ignorant statements. She was locked up for her behavior(Illegal Activity) and when she was free to do as she pleased. She went right back to the same circle of friends and got in trouble again. We are hoping she will grow out of this before too long. She has a much younger sister that loves her and looks up to her. We are worried that her actions will affect her younger sisters attitude towards her elders in the future. In short, You are not alone. :o)-Tony
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@celticeagle (106694)
• Boise, Idaho
15 Jan 10
Hey Tony! Your unconventional job could be a reason for conversation between you. Too bad he choses to redicule. My grandparents were always great to me. I had some issues when younger but they were always good to me. Sorry you have to put up with this. Sounds like you have the same sort of youth in your family as I do. Ugh! I just want to hit my head against the wall. So frustrating. She will look right at us and lie. That I really hate! Can't trust a word she says. I hope that the younger sister you speak of will see the situation for what it is. Take care, hang in there and thanks so much for your response.
• United States
15 Jan 10
Thank you for raising the question. It felt good to write it down for someone else to hear. :o)
@writersedge (22579)
• United States
15 Jan 10
That generation has a rough time. My Grandfather ex-communicated my Uncle. Why? Because he married a Protestant. He told him to get out and not come back. It was his way or the highway. No one should ridicule anyone. In this day and age, I would be so proud if everyone in my family had a legal job, I can't begin to tell you. People who have had jobs for 5 to 10 years at the same place are loosing them. I went to a family gathering and my Aunt asked me if I go to church. I said, "No," without thinking and then winced thinking she was going to let me have it. She said, "Your Mother must be rolling in her grave.. ... I won't lecture you." I thanked her for that. My religion is in the woods,in the air, over land and seas, it's not bound by a church. Thank goodness my Grandfather isn't alive, can you imagine?
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@dawnald (84124)
• Shingle Springs, California
15 Jan 10
Hm, well there's the step-brother who picks his nose in front of people. That's about the worst it gets unless you get two of my aunts who can't stand each other in the same room. Fortunately they're on the east coast and I'm on the west coast.
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@celticeagle (106694)
• Boise, Idaho
15 Jan 10
That is gross! My grandson used to do that until I put a quit cabosh on it. I told him: "If you're hungry go get you a yogurt, if you need to blow your nose go to the bathroom and get some toilet paper!" The nasty look I gave him did the trick too.
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@dawnald (84124)
• Shingle Springs, California
15 Jan 10
Very gross and he's a grown up man, older than I am. I didn't see it myself, but several other people have.
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@celticeagle (106694)
• Boise, Idaho
16 Jan 10
I wonder why he thinks that is okay?
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@Lakota12 (42794)
• United States
16 Jan 10
OH YES! My son in laws mother! SHe comes her with a great grand daughter and sets on her bottom all day and hollers at every thing. that she does drives ya up a wall . and she had twisted around in my late hubby recliner till the bolt fell out and didnt say a word! . Daughter found out after the woman had left. BUt She thought we were going to wait on her hand and foot! . SHe would set while we cooked and vcleaned never offered to help . then thought we would bring the food to her NOT!. And my grand daughter who is a very good kid for a 5 year old with a big imagination. The woman says she just not all there for grand daughter does come up with alot of things to do . and grand daughter cant even walk across the floor with out this woman hollering at her. Well grand daughter has picked that up so she hollers at us. We call her on it of course and tell her we dont holler at each other like that. Been almost a month since the woman left but alas she is coming back!.
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@celticeagle (106694)
• Boise, Idaho
16 Jan 10
Oh, and they always tend to come back don't they??!! Grrr! This granddaughter of mine manipulates her mom and does such crap but I see it and say no way and then all the crap hits the fan. I am always the bad guy and I am so very sick of it.
@Lakota12 (42794)
• United States
17 Jan 10
Oh YEs they do. I am getting fed up with it and I think daughter and I are going to lay down some more rules when they come back. I dont care if I am the bad feller This is my house ya go by MY rules. My youngest son says we have to many rules lol When he comes to visit he tries not to follow them but I have to laugh about it for he does it natrually with out thinking about it.
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@celticeagle (106694)
• Boise, Idaho
20 Jan 10
I think you are right to set rules and have house rules. Then others know what is expected of them. Kids (our kids that is) are always that way aren't they?
@SomeCowgirl (32273)
• United States
18 Jan 10
Celticeagle, It's your home is it not? and your cat I assume as well? Then what she said was just uncalled for, atleast I think it was. I've read a bit about the troubles with your granddaughter. I've wrote a discussion about my uncle, the truth is I haven't seen or talked to him in a long time, probably a few weeks after my nephew's birthday. Well the ordeal that caused me to not want to talk to my uncle, happened on my nephew's birthday, and I think the whole family agreed with me on it. I can't say I've forgiven him, but I've forgotten about it atleast... well as far as not dwelling on it is concerned.
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@celticeagle (106694)
• Boise, Idaho
18 Jan 10
It is good not to dwell on such things. My problem is it is just such bizarre and rediculously disrespectful(far beyond the cat incident)and she should know this and not want to cause her own family greif and problems. She doesn't care and thinks only of herself. This is what agrevates me. Yet she expects to just do as she pleases and doesn't care. SHE JUST DOESN'T GET IT!!!!
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@SomeCowgirl (32273)
• United States
18 Jan 10
To me it sounds as if she's still get some growing up to do, she's 18? or am I mistaken? She may not have matured yet. Has she had a job? I forget, so sorry if you've said. I know she's pregnant, I just hope that matures her.
@bunnybon7 (30017)
• Holiday, Florida
17 Jan 10
omg, even before i got to read about the person you was refering to, i was wondering if everyone would think bad of me if i said my granddaughter!! thats the first one came to my mind. worst of all is she is just like your granddaughter AND does the burp and fart thing and thinks its funny feel for me, i had to live in the same room with her sharing a bedroom which incedenly stayed dirtier then barn on her side most of the time.that was for almost 2 years!so, i know your pain.but yes believe it, i still love her.
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• United States
16 Jan 10
I have a relative that married into our family that generally just thinks they're better than everyone else. That and they think that just because they know share a last name common in our family that gives them the right to butt their nose into everyone's business. It drives me insane because she thinks she's holier than thou and can do no wrong. I make it a point to avoid her as much as I can. I let other people know that I'm not fond of her and wish not to speak to her if I can help it. I'm not sure if she knows I do not like her but I could care less either way.
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@celticeagle (106694)
• Boise, Idaho
17 Jan 10
I had a sister-in-law just like what you describe. She was quite a character to say the very least. I think we both should recieve sainthood for putting up with them!
• Philippines
16 Jan 10
I am not so sure if I cannot stand her to be around, but I don't really like it when she always borrows money from me, like I have a job or something.
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@celticeagle (106694)
• Boise, Idaho
16 Jan 10
They just don't seem to care. They are just in the minute.
@l33tgirl (289)
• New Zealand
16 Jan 10
With my family I just ignore it and try to stay out of it as much as I possibly can. Simply because I know I can't change who these people are and it's not worth me getting upset over them. The cat thing with your granddaughter is awful. At the end of the day she is staying with you and she should respect you and the way you live your life, as well as whoever you share it with, animals included. I have some awful family members but because they are family and I can't do anything without causing a rift, it's simply better to let things go. However they don't live with me so maybe it is easier said than done.
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@celticeagle (106694)
• Boise, Idaho
16 Jan 10
Ya, the family thing is very hard. Her mom feels bad for her because she is pregnant. She is also eighteen and needs to get a handle on things. She is a Sagittarius and so is very one-minded. I think having things and friends outside the family scene helps alot.
@coolcoder (2022)
• United States
15 Jan 10
I don't like being around all of my very young cousins. I'm serious--I can't handle hearing them running all over the place and yelling every few seconds. Five minutes of that, and I'm ready to get out of wherever my family happens to be at that moment in time. I just can't deal with the kids.
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@celticeagle (106694)
• Boise, Idaho
16 Jan 10
i can't handle ill-mannered and disruptive children. That is partly what I have here. She is eighteen and she knows if she brings illegal items on our property the authorities will be called. I just can't stand living in a situation where she looks you right in the eye, says she fully understands and then afew weeks down the road it happens again.