Do you call before going to someone's house?

@free_man (7339)
United States
January 29, 2010 5:19pm CST
I have some people we know that will show up without calling and it really pisses me of when they don't call first. So would you go to someones house without calling first? I think it is rude of people that don't call to see if I want company. What about you do you think it is rude?
8 people like this
37 responses
• United States
30 Jan 10
Hello. I think it is very rude to show up without calling. People are always coming to our house without calling and I despise it. I think it is the right thing to call before you go to someones house so they can prepare for your visit. Not everyone is decent while they are in their own home. If I am alone, I rarely answer the door to those who don't call first. I think a good rule of thumb is to call before you go to other people's houses. I wonder if those who don't like it when it happens to them?
@free_man (7339)
• United States
30 Jan 10
Hi Purplerain and welcome to my lot. I think it is real rude to just show up. We would never show up at someones home without calling first they might be in the middle of something, or they may just not want company at that time. If they don't answer their phone we don't go to their home. Thanks.
• United States
30 Jan 10
Before going to people's houses I call first. I appreciate the same treatment in return. I do think it is rude to come knocking on the door expecting to be let in if you haven't called first. As a rule I do not even answer the door if I am at home because I wasn't given notice first. My roommate is sickly and it is not all of the time that she is up for company so I really do need advance warning.
3 people like this
@free_man (7339)
• United States
30 Jan 10
Hi Sissy and welcome to my lot. I don't think people these days was brought up to stop and consider anyone. And that will make me madder then if they come by without calling. We have this one person that we know that will show up anytime and expect us to just drop what we are doing and talk. We have a small home business and we don't have time to stop and just chit chat without notice. I hope your roomy gets better soon. Thanks.
2 people like this
@marguicha (39725)
• Chile
29 Jan 10
I usually invite or wait until I´m inveted. But sometimes I want to see a close friend or someone in my family. Of course I call first. They might have something else to do. I hadn´t thought if it was rude or not not to call because it doesn´t happen to me. I suppose I would not like it much if it did happen. Happy posting!
3 people like this
@olisaur (1932)
• United States
29 Jan 10
I hate that too! My ex boyfriend used to come over all the time without calleing when we were together- I HATEDDDD is because I was never ready. I'd not have makeup on, and sometimes I was still in my pajamas! I think it is pretty rude for people to just show up with out calling- unless its something really urgent.
3 people like this
@free_man (7339)
• United States
29 Jan 10
Hi Olisaur. I hate it when people don't call before showing up and if they do they will have a long wait we don't answer the door if they don't call first. If it was urgent I think they would call to see if we were at home before showing up. Thanks.
2 people like this
• United States
29 Jan 10
I call before going over to someones house. I think it is rude to go over to someones house without calling first. I know that my sister-in-law shows up to my house a lot without calling first then she leaves messages on the answering machine saying that I stopped by and you had the nerve not being home. I always call her back and say well, if you would pick up a phone and call me first you will realize that I am not at home. My husband and I are in the process of remodeling the house so we really do not want people coming over because we are afraid of someone getting hurt.
3 people like this
@free_man (7339)
• United States
29 Jan 10
Hi Randylovesdar. I think it is real rude of people not to call first. We do have people that we associate with that don't call first and we just act like we are not at home. We don't let people in that don't call first.
2 people like this
• Australia
30 Jan 10
My family and my close friends know that my home is always open to them and they are free to call any reasonable time of the day or night. I expect other friends (and business people) to ring first. Apart from my close friends and family, I would always phone before visiting others.
2 people like this
• Australia
30 Jan 10
People like that certainly need some plain talking.
3 people like this
@Fulltank (2896)
• Philippines
30 Jan 10
Every time we visited a a relatives house, I see to it that they're home. And the only way to make sure is to give them a ring. I don't get pissed-off when someone shows up in my front door without any notice. I would rather take it on a positive way rather than feeling angry about it. These people visits me for some reason and should be given appropriate welcome and accommodation.
2 people like this
@free_man (7339)
• United States
30 Jan 10
Hi Fulltank. My mother brought us up to call before we go to anyones home they might be busy. Most of the time we are busy doing something here or for someone else and have asked everyone we know to call before they show up. One day we were real dirty working in the yard and this couple that is plain not good people to be around showed up. They came at a bad time and didn't even call first. We didn't even stop what we was doing, we couldn't it had to be done before the rain came in. And all they wanted to do is get drunker and tell us about them doing bad things. We both got pissed because they are bad news in the first place. Just not polite to go to someones house without calling first. I can see your side of it but in our book we were brought up with manners and this wouldn't have been done in our day. Thanks
1 person likes this
@Fulltank (2896)
• Philippines
30 Jan 10
If ever that would happen to us, it would be an exemption and would ended up the same feeling as yours. So far, I don't have one and hoping that it goes as is for a longer time.
2 people like this
@free_man (7339)
• United States
30 Jan 10
Hi Fulltank. I hope it never happens to you. But these people are always trying to start something so we have written them off our friends list forever. Thanks
2 people like this
• Philippines
30 Jan 10
I always call the person or text him and waited for his reply before I go to his or her house. I don't want to come to his or her place then be surprise if he or she is not at home... It is such a waste of time, effort and money. However, I think it depends on the person whom you will visit. There are some people who loves surprises. And just want somebody to just come to their house anytime... And also if its your relatives house or any close friend (as in very close) I think coming to their house without asking for permisssion is not a big deal. In fact, sometimes when they come to the house and found out that the person they visited is not at home, they just stay,watch tv or video and waited for the person to come in... like they feel very comfortable and homey... It might be rude or not... But personally, I also like to be asked before anyone will come and visit me...IF there is no special occassion... and just an ordinary day...
2 people like this
@free_man (7339)
• United States
30 Jan 10
Hi Lovelyn_Medrano. It shows respect to call or text them first. I hate wasting time money and effort that is one of the reasons I would rather call the person I want to visit. Thanks
• Philippines
31 Jan 10
Yeah free man, it is a sign of respect also... And for us, particularly me, I don't want anybody to be at my house and me unprepared... But like I said for some it is okay... And i am trying to understand why there are some people who are like that... However, they should know whom to do it and not...
1 person likes this
@DMat93 (10)
• United States
30 Jan 10
It depends on the situation. If it was just a regular day and some people I know came to my house without calling first, I wouldnt be angry or pissed - If anything I would be a little annoyed. I dont mind people coming to my house at random times since my house is open to everyone all the time and people just come and go whenever they want. But if it was my birthday, or thanksgiving, or some other special occasion I would expect them to come and sometimes I would prefer the surprise.
2 people like this
@sushie93 (1359)
• France
30 Jan 10
Yes, i always call before going to someone's house. First, it's to check if this person are not absent because i don't want to deplacing myself for nothing and then, it's to ask for permission because i find that a little rude to go to someone's house before telling them...
2 people like this
@free_man (7339)
• United States
31 Jan 10
Hi Sushie. Your right I think it is real rude for someone to show up without calling. We call before we go to someone's home so we don't waste our time and our gas. We are not wasteful. Thanks
@broboque (146)
• Malaysia
30 Jan 10
For me it depends who is it you are visiting. I would call my friends to see if they are at home or not,(or perhaps just to give him/her sometime to prepare dinner for me before i reach there, LOL). but family, i might not call. Coz its our tradition that families are always welcome, (not midnight onward though). I never do feel irritated or annoyed when someone comes without calling. I still accept them as visitor, its just that i won't have time to prepare dinner. LOL
2 people like this
@free_man (7339)
• United States
30 Jan 10
Hi Broboque. I think it is rude if people don't call first. We have told all the people we know to call first so we can be ready. But have a couple of people we know that try and just show up and this is even after we have asked them to call first. It would be different if it was family. If it is family we drop what ever we are doing and enjoy a good visit. Thanks
@mrar85 (43)
• Malaysia
30 Jan 10
of course you have to call before going to somebody's house. It is very rude and you would definitely be hated by that person that you're going to.. What if that person is not at home... wouldn't it just piss you off?? me myself also prefer that anyone coming to my house to call me and tell that they're coming..it is much easier for us to prepare and to welcome politely..
2 people like this
@free_man (7339)
• United States
30 Jan 10
Hi Marar and welcome to my lot. We know several people that don't have manners and are just plain rude. I get so pissed off when they show up I tell them just what I am thinking. We do call when we are going to visit someone. Thanks
@teamrose (1499)
• United States
30 Jan 10
I call before going to someone's home. Being a Realtor, it is just common practice. However, I have a few friends that never lock their doors and no one ever seems to call, they have an obvious open door policy. If I'm over their way, I just pop in. I like people to call before they come, so I can have tea on the stove.
2 people like this
@free_man (7339)
• United States
30 Jan 10
Hi Teamrose. That must be an exciting job. I like seeing different homes. It must be nice to have and open door policy. We can't not around here there are too many people that will steal you blind. And that includes the people that just show up with no calls. I think it is just a show of respect to call first. Thanks
@jwl890 (47)
30 Jan 10
i like this blog, i always ring when im leaving my house, when im like 5 minutes away from their house and then when im outside there house!
2 people like this
@free_man (7339)
• United States
30 Jan 10
Hi Jwl and welcome to my lot. I love this site it is so cool to be able to chit chat with different people around the world. I think it is a show of respect to call first. Thanks
@rakesh284 (1473)
• India
30 Jan 10
I know it is sometime really irritating if someone comes up without calling. But it depends on our mood if we are in good mood we can sporting take it as some surprise if not in good mood and want to relax or do something personal or stay alone and someone shows up then it is really irritating at that point we might get angry also but will control our emotion. It is actually human nature. As far as visitors are concerned if they are friends then we won't mind it most of the time, if they are someone else we would not behave in the way they might have expecting and they sooner or later realize it and will make their way back.
@Hatley (107842)
• Garden Grove, California
30 Jan 10
hi free__man oh yes indeed I do think it very rude as they do not know if you are planning to go someplace, or its inconvenient for them to see you. I never go to someone else's house without calling first to see if its okay.I did this even with my own mom, as she often did go someplace. Once she just walked in unannounced, and my hubby and I were busy making love in our bedroom as both children were sound asleep.Right at the crucial moment she walks into our bedroom.oh my she gasps, and I gasp mom oh my , my husband the rat fink breaks down laughing. needless to say my mom was upset but she did learn to call first. he he heh
2 people like this
@free_man (7339)
• United States
30 Jan 10
Hi Hatley. I can't blame your husband. He must have thought that was funny. I bet your mom did learn not to just come by....LOL I do think it is rude of people to come by without calling first. We just don't go to anyones home without calling first. Thanks.
• Indonesia
30 Jan 10
I don't have any problem if my friends come to my home without calling. I like friends visiting me. But when i want to go to someone's house, i will call first, to make sure if he/she is available.
2 people like this
@free_man (7339)
• United States
30 Jan 10
Hi Luvlymee and welcome to my lot. We are older and it is just plain polite to call first. Our mothers would have whipped our bottoms if we went to someones house without calling first. Just plain good manners to call first. It is nice that you would call first. It is do unto others as you would have done unto you in our book. If we wouldn't like it then we wouldn't do it to anyone else. Thanks.
2 people like this
@olliekobra1 (1827)
25 Nov 12
I think that if someone is coming to your house they should call and inform you that there coming just because its good mannered i think even if these people are rearly good friends they should still inform you. It also angers me when people just call around, i like to tidy up before people call around if they dont me there coming i cant tidy up.
@free_man (7339)
• United States
11 Feb 13
Hi Olliekobra. I am like you I want to know when someone is calling so I can tidy up and make sure I am not too busy to spend some time with my real friends. I don't like it when people see my home in disorder. I think it is rude to just show up without calling first.
12 Feb 13
i agree i do think that its rude when people just turn up to my house. I try to keep my house as tidy as i can but because i work long hours this isnt always possible so when people do turn up and my house is untidy then i feel ashamed and shouldnt have to feel like that in my own house.
@Ladyslipper (1330)
• Philippines
30 Jan 10
It also pisses me off when someone just arrives in my doorstep without notifying me. Usually when I am at home it could be I am doing some household chores or sleeping. I don't think it is nice to face any visitors not properly dressed and in sweat. That is also the reason I call my friends before I drop by in their place. I also want to make sure that they are at home and ready. I hate it when visitors come and I am not ready like I have not prepared any meal or snacks for them and the house is in a mess because I am in the process of rearranging the furnitures, etc. It is an embarassing situation.
1 person likes this
@free_man (7339)
• United States
30 Jan 10
Hi Lady. If they show up and we are working they know they had better leave or I will put them to work too....LOL I don't know why but some people just plain don't understand it is out of respect to call first. There are people that live around us that we don't even go to their homes but they will show up at our home wanting to just hang out. We don't just hang out we are always busy doing something. There is a friend that we will stop in at his home if he opens the door when we are driving by. This is on a dirt road and we ride this dirt road quite a lot but not to go to visiting him. It is just on the way to where we are going. But if he comes out we will stop and say a few words but usually it is only a few minutes and we are on our way again.
• Philippines
1 Feb 10
Well, that will be a different scenario. It's not like you intentionally went to his place and decided to hang out there for the whole day. I know people who are insensitive. We have a neighbor before who just lives on the other side of our fence(way back home where I was born and where my parents are still living)who always hangs out at home. She stays at home to take care of his two boys (4 and 6 year old). Once his husband already left home for work she would go to our house. Now, my mom is usually very busy. She just wants to stay at home, keep it clean, cook for us and take care of the children. My mom does not like wasting her time just talking about someone else's life. She'd rather do something important. This woman who always go to our house would spend hours and hours just telling stories about other people's life- usually rumors). That's why sometimes my mom would tell me that if that neighbor would look for her I should tell her that my mom is still asleep, has a headache or mom is doing something. Sometimes it does not work. She is so comfortable and is at home that sometimes she would even follow my mom and continue her stories while my mom is washing clothes, doing the dishes, cooking, etc. My mom used to entertain her but when she noticed that everyday she will have to tolerate this lady then she started closing the doors, the windows and would tell us not to open it. Eventually, my mom decided to tell her upfront that she's busy and go back another day until the woman stopped coming to our house everyday. She still comes to our house but it was minimized. I think she is so bored with her life and that is the reason she is always so eager to talk to someone.
1 person likes this
@lkbooi (16113)
• Malaysia
27 Apr 13
Hi free_man, it would be courteous to make a call before visiting someone at home. I like my guest to do so before paying a visit to me as well. It's nice to get our house to look decent with everything right at their place To be frankly sometimes I'm really busy and my sitting room looks messy for don't have time to tidy them. I realize this and don't want to make my friends feeling embarrassing and I certainly will call before going to his or her house Happy posting
1 person likes this
@free_man (7339)
• United States
28 Apr 13
Hi Lkbooi. It just makes sense for me to call before going to someone's house who knows they may not want company. Or they may be busy doing something that is important to them and don't want to be bothered. My brother in law found out the hard way not to just show up here without calling first. He thinks we will drop everything and just sit and talk. We own our home and are always busy doing something we don't just sit around and do nothing. When someone shows up they know we have a gate and keep it locked when we are at home because we don't like to be intruded on when we already have plans. When we don't have the gate locked and are out side working if someone shows up we just plain speak up and say we are busy. Best to be honest. Thanks for sharing my friend.
1 person likes this