Being the elder one, have u ever felt your younger bro/sis is luckier than you

@voldrox (7191)

India

March 10, 2010 5:02am CST

are?? I am the bigger one of the two of us, it is not that my parents paid him more attention or anything like that, he is only an year and four months younger than me, as children we used to fight sometimes and when we did that, mother used to spank me coz i am the older one and i am not supposed to fight with him and after that he would make a face like this

and i would get irritated with his teasing

, quarrel over our property (toys lol) but i don't know why i have always felt he is the luckier one, i guess being the older one i had to go through things first and then i would advice my brother, in that sense he has had to face lesser, i was glad for that, the way i seem to say here may sound like i regret that he was luckier but no it isn't that way. I am glad for my brother, he might be a little luckier to face things after me but hey that gives me the feeling i am the elder one. B-) Although we are like friends now but i am glad he is the one who has had it all, i always wanted a few things but he used to get his earlier, he is better than me in studies and some more things. I am happy for him. :) So people, what do you think? Have you ever felt like your younger brother/sister is more lucky? ?

3 people like this

19 responses

@jaiho2009 (39142)

• Philippines

10 Mar 10

hello dear, I am an eldest of four siblings,and our youngest is also a girl. Perhaps i can say yes...there were times that i really feel she's luckier than me in many aspects. She's prettier than me,and it is true...(hahaha) Well,i think it is a natural feeling...but we are the best of friends,and there is no competition between us.

2 people like this

@voldrox (7191)

• India

11 Mar 10

Hi jaiho, This is funny

why does it always seem like the younger one is prettier, i don't know but that seems to sound a little more towards the stereotype side but yeah even i have observed the younger one actually seems to be prettier

lol but yeah being the elder one makes you stronger, you have to agree with me on this one. Even my brother looks more handsome :D Well we all have our own qualities.

@jaiho2009 (39142)

• Philippines

11 Mar 10

yes dear,i am stronger...and always considered as the strongest amongst us. my siblings even asked advice from me before making some decision with their own lives(most of the times,they seek for my advice) And,of course,i had some qualities that my sister don't have and she also felt jealous when people compared us. Just a healthy jealousy...for she also admits that i had qualities that doesn't possess.

@homeshoppers (6166)

• Philippines

10 Mar 10

i guess it depends, im the youngest in my family and i would say that my older siblings are more lucky than me coz my parents are already old now and dont have job so they cant give me what i want, even my study before, it was my siblings who supported me coz my parents are already old and yet jobless to provide money for my tuition. and so right now, i buy my own things and not from my parents

unlike my older siblings they experience to have a nanny and my parents are able to give them what they want.

2 people like this

@voldrox (7191)

• India

10 Mar 10

Hi homeshoppers, oh yeah that is a different case, but yeah they had their own responsibilities too, they were given the priveldges for handling their responsibilities, once we get independent this feeling of luck goes away, when we get independent it feels nice to be able to stand on our own feet.

1 person likes this

@Sreekala (34312)

• India

10 Mar 10

Hi voldrox, Yes I felt the same and you know how (as I am not the elder), I am the third child and my elder sister is important because she is the eldest and my brother is important because he is the only male child and my younger sister is so important because she is youngest and I am the unwanted child….

If I am related your situation with my kids, the same thing is happens at my home. Elder one is getting scolds for younger one’s mistakes and the last week he asked me, why you delivered this boy???????

(as his father scold him and favouring the younger one). I told him don’t say like that you are elder than him and he is only 2+ and doesn’t know anything so father can scold you only as you are bigger child.

2 people like this

being elder one

@voldrox (7191)

• India

10 Mar 10

Hi Sreekala, yeah i guess sometimes parents expect the older one not into into fights with the younger one and i since like in your case too the age difference is only 2 years so they probably get into fights more hehe.. unwanted child? oh comm'on.

it is interesting many feel this way.

1 person likes this

@reploid (1371)

• France

10 Mar 10

Yes. I have felt that once, Now, I laugh when I think about it. I think that everyone is lucky to some extent, your younger brother or sister could be luckier at home but you could be luckier at something else. Like I said everyone is lucky to some extent.

2 people like this

@voldrox (7191)

• India

10 Mar 10

yes you are right reploid, perhaps i am being selfish thinking this way.

hehe .. anyways have a good day.

1 person likes this

@sender621 (14894)

• United States

10 Mar 10

Sometimes being an eldest child is a tough burden to bear. I should know since I am an eldest child in my family. More responsibilities are thrown on to the eldest child. Younger siblings are left to follow your example. The pressure is on older siblings. There are times when I do feel my siblings are lucky. Older siblings are just left to pave the road ahead.

2 people like this

@voldrox (7191)

• India

10 Mar 10

Hi sender621, you are right, we have more responsibilities on our shoulders and more is expected from us than our younger siblings, we need to take care of them too. Joannaleed, we are senior and we take responsibilities, that makes us more mature and respectful.

1 person likes this

• Philippines

10 Mar 10

I'm sorry you felt that way. I never actually felt that way because my parents treat us all equally. Whatever I have are the things that my siblings have, not exactly the same but we are all fare. We fought a lot when we were younger but we are best friends. So no feeling of jealousy or anything of some sort really existed between us. And we are all different in class, my brother is the smartest of us all but opur parents managed to make us feel equal, like we are all the smartest kind of feeling, so we are so happy about it, everyone is appreciated.

2 people like this

@voldrox (7191)

• India

10 Mar 10

hi mike4me, well i am not jealous of my brother, and my parents loved us both, but i guess sometimes more is expected from the elder one and so it was expected from me to not get into fights but since i could not control my anger

i used to get into fights and then i was supposed to stop hurting, we are good friends now.

..

1 person likes this

@lingli_78 (12822)

• Australia

10 Mar 10

i am the middle child in my family and i have one elder and younger brother... and i don't feel lucky at all being a middle child... i feel that my elder brother is much more luckier than me... he got the best of everything in terms of love and materialistic things because he is the eldest grandson as well from my father side... so my grandfather really loves him very very much... i always get a hand down goods from my brother while he always get the brand new one from my parents (in terms of school text books)... but as i grow older, i stop thinking like that and just learn to appreciate everything that God has given to me and give thanks all the time... take care and have a nice day...

1 person likes this

@voldrox (7191)

• India

16 Mar 10

hi lingli, even i have felt the way you did, but i am the elder one, my younger brother seemed to get all that he wanted and apart from that he was even good at beating over me in studies, well but now we both have grown up and are like very good friends.

.. thanks :) you have a nice day too..

RawBill AKA MrAusAdventure

@RawBill1 (8531)

• Gold Coast, Australia

10 Mar 10

I have only one sibling. A sister who is six years younger than me. I used to feel that way when I was younger as she was helped a lot more financially than I was and my parents do realise this as they once leant me money after I returned from overseas and then told me not to worry about paying it back as they had helped her out way more than me as she was a student for 8 years longer than I was! They still help her out with baby sitting her kids and I feel that she takes advantage of them for this. We moved interstate and have been raising our kids on a single income without the help of baby sitting help from family and this can be tough, but my sister seems to not understand that my mum is getting older and cannot deal with young kids all day everyday while her and her husband both go to work.

1 person likes this

@voldrox (7191)

• India

16 Mar 10

oh, your sister needs to realize she can't be dependent on some for their whole life, especially parents, they get older and they have some other issues to worry about as well, she has been spoon fed a lot friend, it's time to slowly take her out of there, she needs to be more independent, she clearly has too much attention, parents are not to be blamed but how long can they help?.. hope she realizes all these soon and things move along smoothly..

@RachelleNH (1396)

• United States

10 Mar 10

LOL, I remember those days..I am 5 years older than my sis and I always got the blame.

I'm not sure if it's luck but she's gotten everything she's ever wanted in life...be it her career (which is attainable for anyone really), her love of her life, lots of friends..anything...you name it. I've always thought that maybe she was just more charismatic and people like that more. We're complete opposites-I'm not much of a people person.

1 person likes this

younger sibling

@voldrox (7191)

• India

10 Mar 10

Hi RachelleNH, even my condition is somewhat like that, my brother seems to be ahead of me and even i am not much of a people person and he seems to be a lot more friendlier with others but anyways we all have our own qualities Rachelle, just be yourself, that makes us what we are, and we would be admired the way we are.

1 person likes this

@RachelleNH (1396)

• United States

10 Mar 10

This is very true, we all have our strengths and our weaknesses. We are all unique. The funny thing about her and I is that she is very codependant on people-she told me one time that she fears being alone. I, on the other hand, enjoy my solitude.

1 person likes this

@ebuscat (5935)

• Philippines

11 Mar 10

For me when I get young age like 5years old back I feel that he is luckier than me but when thing go change and when I get mature I love my brother to much now.

1 person likes this

@voldrox (7191)

• India

18 Mar 10

hi ebuscat, same with me friend, we both used to fight so much when we were children, brings back old memories thinking about those cute days

.. anyways now we have grown up and become like two very good friends.

.. have a nice day ebuscat.

@kaylachan (57821)

• Daytona Beach, Florida

11 Mar 10

I would have to say that I don't and I do. I was the next to youngest in a string of much older siblings, a lot of wich were adults three times my age. I did have a younger sister, or offically anyway. We were both adopted, and my sister kind of became my youngest sister's mother because back then single parents couldn't adopt. Anayway. I was severally disabled (still am) and my parents were protective of me. I thought my sister was younger because she got to do what I didn't do, which was live. so yeah problem there.

1 person likes this

@voldrox (7191)

• India

18 Mar 10

hi kaylachan, i am sorry you felt that way friend, yeah parents feel more protective of the ones who are prone to some things, my brother used to fight with me and i could not just keep quiet but at the same time it was expected from me not to get into fights, mom would spank me and end matters and it was really frustrating to see my brother taunt me behind my mom's back, i would want to tell mom about it but then i let it go. have a nice day dear friend.

@libnawilkerson (298)

• Mexico

11 Mar 10

Greetings Mr. Voldrox. I am also the bigger one of three sisters. I feel lucky because my parents trusted me more and let me do more things than my sisters. I know they envy me a bit for being able to be more independent. But I think the little one is the most consented and the one in the middle is the one that receives the most material stuff. I am married now, so I'm out of the game. I've always loved my sisters so much and I miss them a lot. What I miss the most is to watch cartoon movies we used to see as children, or favorite TV show and make desserts. They want to come and visit me in three weeks but I don't know if my father would let them because I live like 10 hours away. I hope they could come, then I'll be the lucky one. Nice day, Libna.

1 person likes this

@voldrox (7191)

• India

18 Mar 10

hi libnawilkerson, i hope you get to meet your sisters frequently

yeah the elder ones are expected to put up some responsibilities and hence we are given a little more freedom compared to our younger siblings, but something is there, the younger one seems to get things they wanted, i mean sooner than we do get. i am glad for you and your sisters, yeah getting married makes things all different, have an nice day friend and your sister would see you soon!

• India

11 Mar 10

i think it happens to everyones life having brother or sister.The younger one always get the advantage just because they are younger.i have only one sister 9 yrs younger than me and we always use to bickers and fights all the time for a simple thing.But most of the time my parents always scold her as because first time i provoke her which they can't see and she use to beat me which every one can see. My mother always said to my sister that your sister will someday go to her in laws home then she should feel alone.Now i think that was a very good time with full of fun in life.

1 person likes this

@voldrox (7191)

• India

18 Mar 10

hi Alivia, oh you had a little case then, when and my brother used to fight it was always expected for me to stop fighting with my younger sibling, anyways yeah now when we look back we can smile coz we used to fight so often but now we are like two very good friends.

.. have a nice day Alivia.

@Lochoa (222)

• United States

10 Mar 10

I am the eldest of 3. We are all 5 years apart from one another. I'm 25 (going to be 26) then the middle one is 21 then the baby is 15 (going to be 16) The baby one isn't too spoiled but she's never got spanked! Not that I blame it at all! She's the most intelligent out of all of us at her age. The middle one is the most spoiled, my Mom believed in the whole middle child doesn't get the most attention so I feel like she gave her extra attention so she wouldn't feel left out b/c I was the oldest then the baby of the family. Well now I feel like my mom still babies her and even my lil sis has said my mom does too much! But b/c my mom babied her so much it's harded for her to be more independent! So after everything I do not feel jealous b/c my sister has to learn how to grow up at 21 and it's hard bu my mom still helps her out so how much does she have to go through to learn that she can't depend on our mom. I hope this make sense!

1 person likes this

@voldrox (7191)

• India

12 Mar 10

Hi Lochoa, yes i understand what you are saying, well it is natural for the parents to react that way, in most cases if there are two siblings, the younger ones tend to get more spoiled

and that way parents seem to provide more for them, and the elder ones for some reason seem to be more aware of what they do and hence making them more mature, as in your case the middle child as you say is getting spoiled, well she should should be taken care of you and must follow you as an example, but love and attention in excess sometimes makes one weaker, they have to learn to be stronger as in most cases the elder one is, being elder has our own advantages, we get to learn and experience things first hand and we are able to help our younger siblings, thanks for sharing Lochoa, have a nice day.

apocalypsereturns

@apocalypsereturns (368)

• India

11 Mar 10

I do think that my brother is lucky but its not because parents pay more attention to him. Come to think of it you have the same condition as mine. my brother is a also just more than a year younger to me , and he happens to benefit from my decision. He follows my every step, sometimes its frustating as he does not do things his own way, it makes me worry what would happen if i left him?

@voldrox (7191)

• India

18 Mar 10

i am sure your brother would do great apocalysereturns

.. they just need to take on some responsibilities alone and it would work out to be good, just take care not to make him too much dependent on you, even i never felt my parents took more care of my younger brother but you know sometimes it really seems that way coz i guess they do get luckier somehow

.. have a nice day.

@MrKennedy (1978)

•

10 Mar 10

Sometimes it does feel that too much responsibility is placed on me since I am the eldest, and I am expected to take care of my siblings and do stuff for them without receiving much in return

However, I still love them no matter what and enjoy spending time with them

1 person likes this

@voldrox (7191)

• India

11 Mar 10

Hi MrKennedy, Yeah it is the same i feel, without in much return, but yeah my parents never let me feel i was left out, i had to be an example for my brother and so i had to work on it a little and i was expected to, i don't know why he always seemed to get what he wants but i had to wait, anyways we love our siblings.

.. good day.

@bounce58 (17387)

• Canada

10 Mar 10

I got a 9-year old and a 3-year old. And like you and your brother, when these two boys fight, I'm always harder on my older son. I guess I expect him to be more responsible and to take cared of his kid brother. That was how I was brought up. I have a younger brother, but I think what happened in our case was that I got all the attention. Well at least until our sister came out. For now, as a big brother, I would wish all the luck for my younger brother and sister. I always hope that they are happier in their lives.

@voldrox (7191)

• India

16 Mar 10

hi bounce, well i guess that is what expected from most of the older ones in case siblings get into fights, now we both have grown up and we laugh at our old days.

we both are like very good friends now.

@Professor2010 (20162)

• India

1 Apr 10

Hello i am the 4th in my family, there are three elder sisters, brother is younger to me, well as per my faith we are born with our luck, we can't change our destiny, we had the highest education, we worked in high salary jobs, both are retired now. I never thought he was more or less lucky than me, we are very close to each other, happy with our kids and grandkids Thanks for this nice post Prof

@voldrox (7191)

• India

4 Apr 10

Well it does happen a little because as being the elder one we face some things for our younger siblings, anyways even my brother are more like my friends now... there is not much difference now we both are doing our studies... Thanks :) Have a nice day.

@umit_umit (1984)

• India

10 Mar 10

It with everybody,human nature is this only!what can we do in this?yeah I Aslo feels the same as they are young and have more facalities than us,and its natural with the parents also?take it easy!

1 person likes this

@voldrox (7191)

• India

11 Mar 10

hi umit_umit, well yes many have this sort of feeling, coz i guess of the responsibilities we need to take care of while our younger siblings would just be following us, but anyway, we benefit experience out of it.

.. have a good day friend.