Do you to point out their mistakes to others?
By Pose123
@Pose123 (21635)
Canada
March 30, 2010 9:05pm CST
Do you know someone who thinks it necessary to report everyone's mistakes to them, to correct them every time it happens? Sometimes it can be difficult to keep it to ourselves,especially when we think we know a better way, but we should all try,unless someone's life or safety depends on it. I'm not saying it can't be done sometimes,or that we shouldn't help someone who is just learning a new job but I'm sure we would not welcome someone else pointing out our every misstep so why do it to others? Do you think that some people see it as their duty in life to make sure that all goes the way they think it should?
1 person likes this
12 responses
@nangisha (3495)
• Indonesia
1 Apr 10
I have a friend like that she want to make other people better, in her own opinion, she just does't understand how it bother to other, I hate it when he do that to me. I hope he will stay away from me forever. she doesn't realize how short minded he is, If you hurt his feeling he will tell it to the world and make you feel like criminal. If I had problem with others I will keep it myself and I am good in keeping secret.
@Pose123 (21635)
• Canada
1 Apr 10
Hi nangisha, Thank you for sharing this and your friend needs to learn that it works both ways. Ask him to put himself in their shoes the next time he points out someone. Robbie Burns the great Scottish poem said it best. In today's English it would read something like "this gift I give you to see yourself as others see you". Blessings.
@artistry (4151)
• United States
1 Apr 10
....Hi Pose123, Interesting question. Just the other day, someone wrote a response in a discussion, telling me, I think in good humor, to not be so ........... The word they used does not exist, but I knew what they meant. I deliberated with whether or not to point it out to them, that there was no such word and decided to leave it alone. I have made up words in my life or used words that were not in the context or full meaning of what I was tryimg to say. So be it.
I do think that if it is seriously important, then perhaps you should point out a mistake, but not every time someone does something not in line with what should be. It depends on the gravity of the situation in my opinion. Take care.
1 person likes this
@Pose123 (21635)
• Canada
1 Apr 10
Hi artistry, That's a good way of putting it, thank you. Naturally, there are times when we have to correct someone, but if it's done in the right way, very few will take offense. Understanding how to do do this is what separates a good teacher from a bad one, or a good boss from someone we would never want to work for. Blessings.
@ronaldinu (12422)
• Malta
31 Mar 10
HI Pose123, No I don't like the idea of pinpointing every one's wrong doings to correct them each time they step out of line. If he or she is a good friend of mine and it is something gross, yes I would be tempted to say it in a nice manner. However if I don;t know the individual or have superficial relationship with him or her I just would keep my mouth shut. Sometimes people do turn against you if you pinpoint a wrong doing. Others might thank you. It depends on the person an situation.
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@singuri (571)
• India
31 Mar 10
Sometimes I do. If the mistake is horrible then I point out the person. Otherwise I keep quite if the mistake is small. Very few times I show my fingers at others.THere is a saying" When you point your finger at others,four of your fingers points at you". Therefore We ourselves are not perfect , then why should we try to correct ourselves. First clean yourself and then try to clean others. You are not appointed to rectify others mistakes. Helping is different from pointing out others.
@lipstick2009 (1236)
• Philippines
1 Apr 10
I hate people who are fault finders, my ex was.(^_^)
We all makes mistakes, we make them while learning lessons and we still commit the same mistakes sometimes. We just have to give room for others so they will be more inspired to improve and change their ways. If we just keep pointing out their mistakes , we are dampening their will to improve.
Perfectionists are a pain in the neck.(^_^)
Nobody is perfect.
1 person likes this
@kharlav (1667)
• Philippines
31 Mar 10
I some people who are like that. I dont think we should be doing it though, we should try to check ourselves first before trying to correct other people or before trying to tell them they're wrong; because we might end up being humiliated. I remember these words which a friend of mine told me, he said, "remember that when you point your fingers to another person, 1 is pointing at him but 3 fingers are pointing at you"; which means that most of the time we point out our fingers and blaming others, not knowing that we are worse than the other person.
If your really care for your friend or the other person, you just tell him what he did wrong if you could not help it, because most of us don't really know our badside or what we did wrong (because we are the ones acting so we don't see ourselves); but don't correct/scold your friend all the time, because it becomes annoying. Ones is enough.
1 person likes this
@chiyosan (30181)
• Philippines
31 Mar 10
Iam really careful when it comes to pointing out whose mistake, etc. i never like blaming others for the turn of events or anything related to that. I believe we need more than blaming to others what they could have done and what they did wrong. People may take offense in whatever we say and we can hurt someone when we are not careful with what we say, or do.
As for me, if the person is a friend and i know he/she will not be offended i will still weigh if he is ready to take any suggestions. unless an advice is seeked from me, i shall not openly talk about people's mistakes, whatsoever
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@krajibg (11922)
• Guwahati, India
31 Mar 10
Hi pose,
Very nice discussion indeed. Many people many minds and hence this is a personal and individual issue if one is happy being pointed out the mistake and hence corrected. Some happily welcome such move you make and some other would surely scowl as if saying -"who the hell you are to poke you nose into my job?"
Since people are complicated and so is their life we need to calculate the whole atmosphere before pin pointing one's mistake. In my view unless asked for it would be like an act of an extrovert to go ahead and steer one's mistake towards proper direction.
Earlier I would get really upset if people showed my mistake but as I grow now I feel what people say has two directions, one is to really see your good and some are to make you feel down. Now I take them as they come and after sieving them I keep what I actually need and if necessary I do correct my action and if think that what I did was right anyway, I ignore.
The best thing is to judge the person and his situation and decide what to tell him and know for sure that he/she does not get upset or hurt.
1 person likes this
@Pose123 (21635)
• Canada
1 Apr 10
Hi rajib, I think that you have stated this very well and I certainly agree. There are of course those who appear to enjoy pointing out other people's mistakes and that's really where the problem lies, none of us are perfect. Thank you for sharing your ideas. Blessings.
@chiepao (714)
• Philippines
31 Mar 10
I know someone who's like that. It's my dad. He always points out every single mistakes that me and my siblings have. My dad runs his own business and he wants us to be in it. I like it of course, but every single, even little mistakes are pointed and and my dad tries to correct us. I know what he's doing is for our own good. I wouldn't be here and be able to help him with what he needs if it wasn't for him himself.
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@picjim (3002)
• India
31 Mar 10
To point out each and every mistake of the other person i feel is not healthy.It is good to overlook small errors.If a person is committing a grave error or wrongdoing its good to correct them but to intervene and correct every action means we are trying to control the others.Yes some people do see it as a duty to correct others but its not very healthy.In life even for the best of us life doesn't always go as it should so its better to adjust to the difficult situations instead of nit picking.
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@apoljuice1 (730)
• Philippines
31 Mar 10
I don't usually point out people's mistakes to them. I believe people are old enough to know what they did wrong and what they did right. I'm sure the embarrassment of finding out what they did was wrong was enough to let them know it was wrong so that you don't have to point things out to them. just prod them a little bit and ask if they know what they did wrong, but that's about it.
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@setsuna26 (2748)
• Philippines
31 Mar 10
When im all feed up i just cant help it but to do so. Some people can be really irritating unless you tell them about it then wont realize it so there are times that i make it a point that he or she knows the reason why im freakin feeling bad about them. Plus its more like a wake up call for them too ;)
