Is it okay to fall in love with someone younger than you?

Philippines
April 11, 2010 12:44am CST
This is from a girl's perspective because it's the usual scenario for the guys. But for girls, is it a big deal when we fall in love with a guy younger (2 years or more) than us? What are the disadvantages and advantages? Who's going to handle the relationship then? Please help me..hehe
5 people like this
44 responses
@yresh12 (3222)
• Philippines
11 Apr 10
Hello hunter kim!! They say younger men are much sweeter than older guys.. They are more showy in there feelings and show care more. Mature men on the other hand keeps feelings to themselves.. Don't play around much and there most PRIORITY is getting married.. That's the thing that could hinder us...
@net101 (158)
• India
11 Apr 10
It is well accepted fact and matter of experience that age does not matter- as long as there is few year difference. If the age difference is of several years, one needs to think. two years is not as big a period as to make any remarkable difference.
@yresh12 (3222)
• Philippines
11 Apr 10
Hey net! You have a good point there.. It is really a biggy when your partner is like 20 years older or 20 years younger than you..
• United Arab Emirates
27 Dec 10
how about if there's a drastic age gap say 10 - 14?
• United States
11 Apr 10
I personally would rather fall in love with a guy who's older than me (not A LOT older-just a few years)... But I don't think there is anything with falling in love with a younger guy. As long as he's mature! And it would help if he at least LOOKED your age (or older). I don't mean he has to have wrinkles and things like that, I just mean he dressed maturely, carries himself maturely...there are a lot of things anyone can do to make themselves look older/better. When it comes down to it, love is love...age shouldn't matter too much (as long as everything's legal!)
@zashimi (148)
• Philippines
11 Apr 10
For me there is nothing wrong with falling for a younger guy. Most of the guys I dated are younger and in essence more fun. Older guys have a special charm though. As long as you and your guy understand each other and you feel like equals, go for it!
• United States
11 Apr 10
I agree with everything you said, if I happened to fall in love with a younger guy I wouldn't just walk away! That would be a stupid reason! lol But older guys do definitely have a special charm! lol
@Draeke (324)
• United States
21 Apr 10
aparently it is ok cause my girlfriend is about 8 years older than me :) things have been great for us since meeting just over a year ago. Things just seem to be getting better everyday.
• Philippines
21 Apr 10
Wow. That's great. Hope you'll continue living and nurturing your relationship. And hope that I'll find mine, too. Haha! Thanks for the response.
• Philippines
11 Apr 10
i think it not much problem until you love each other and you respect each other then there is no problem loving a guy younger than you, just respect him and he will respect you, both you should handle the relationship not only one of you because it is a commitment between the two of you so do no afraid to love a guy younger than you, and besides he can do many rounds of s**, hehe just kidding
• Philippines
11 Apr 10
I'm not after the last part, to be honest. Thanks for the response!
• Philippines
11 Apr 10
Of course, it is just fine, there is a saying, everything is fair in love and war. Don't be too conscientious when somebody like your friend or relative will know about that, there is nothing wrong, it is just an age and sometimes it is only a state of mind, you know many men are mature enough even though young in age and sometimes the older ones are the ones immature.
• Philippines
11 Apr 10
Thank you so much for all your responses! Appreciate them a lot.
@eLsMarie (4135)
• Philippines
11 Apr 10
I don't see any mistake in falling in love with a guy who's much younger than me... It only matters when he's not really that mature to handle our relationship. They always believe that older guys can take good care of the relationship unlike younger men due to their experiences but I doubt it. I think it's only a matter of who's man enough to handle his girl...
@arlera (87)
19 Apr 12
hi, its easy to say but when it does happen u dont know what to do im in a situation where im much older i love him yes but im breaking it up because i think it will be best for him.
@fever324 (51)
• United States
11 Apr 10
Of course its not. If you truely love each other, age is not a problem at all. I have a friend and his aunt is ten years older than her hunsband. They have no problem with. In fact, they are happy about it. If you really like the guy, go for it. I hope you can find your love. :)
• Philippines
11 Apr 10
Thanks for the last part, @fever324. Actually it's kinda weird for both of us because we are not friends yet and I really don't understand why this feeling has been staying since I was in 3rd year college (I graduated last April last year). I've shared this to my college buddies ever since and they told me that maybe we were "connected" in our 'past lives'. I don't know if I'll believe but whatever it is, I hope I'll get clarified soon. It's hard to deal with feelings which you're not sure if they're going to turn into reality.
@maximax8 (27060)
14 Jan 11
When a lady is 20 years old she probably wouldn't want to date an 18 year old. However when she is 28 years old she would happily date a 26 year old. Say she gets to 37 years old she would date a 34 year old. This would be a 3 year age and it wouldn't matter. I don't think it is right for me to fall in love with a man more than 5 years younger than me. The disadvantage would be people's nasty comments. When my mom's friend was 50 she dated a 39 year old man. People said he was her toy boy and that sort of nasty stuff. Their relationship lasted a couple of years.
@dorannmwin (36611)
• United States
11 Nov 10
I simply have to preface with the fact that I am now married to a wonderful man that is five years older than I am. That said, my first boyfriend was a few years younger than me and though it felt like a great relationship at the time, I don't think looking at in in retrospect that there could have ever been a future in it because of the fact that he was so immature. Perhaps if both he and I had been a few years older, there could have been a future, but my feeling is that we were both too young for it to have ever worked out.
@_Honey_ (781)
• Philippines
15 May 10
Why not? Love is not a matter of age. It's a matter of maturity, responsibility, trust, understanding and a conscious to keep your relationship healthy, stable and not-a-mediocre, not complacent and long-lasting.
@elokps (138)
• Indonesia
14 Apr 10
For me it doesn't matter haveing boyfriend younger than me. My boyfriend now is 14 years younger than me but until now we still enjoy our relationship and we happy with that. At first I always tried to reject him but he kept convince me that he doesn't care about age then I gave up to him and we still love each other until now. so age doesn't matter for love relationship as long as we love each other.
• Philippines
13 Apr 10
Hi hunterkim_07, are you familiar with the saying that goes this way: All is fair in love? Love is a many splendored thing? Love is blind? Maybe these will answer your questions. The thing is, age doesn't matter where you're in love is true. Quite awkward for the girls especially in Asian countries but nowadays it's well tolerated. For me as long as the feeling is mutual for both party why not. Two years is not a big deal. I've heard even stories that a woman is ten years older than her husband.
@ybong007 (6660)
• Philippines
13 Apr 10
younger guys who are able to get older girls are considered cool. But it's no longer the case when you are older. Older guys are considered cool when they get younger girls. What's important is both of you enjoy each others company. Don't pay attention on the age as it is not the basis for maturity. Your happiness should be based on whether you want to be with the other person regardless of that person's age. In a relationship, what matter's is the couple's feelings towards each other and not about how you look together based on other's perspectives.
@Lena25 (51)
• United States
13 Apr 10
Oh yes, men have been doing this for decades and more than 2 yrs. younger than he. So what is the big deal if this is what you want. The guy may be more mature than a older man so I say go for it if that's what you want. I see nothing wrong with it. More power to all the ladies that want that type of relationship or marriage.
@zoey7879 (3107)
• United States
12 Apr 10
I'm 12.5 years older than my boyfriend. He's almost 20. We have a decent relationship and have had for a couple of years now. Honestly, it's been a MUCH better relationship than when I dated guys who were -5/+5 or that were 5+ years older than myself. Typical advantages: Financial stability College/Career training already out of the way The younger one of the couple won't like at you like a fool if you still enjoy childhood things such as coloring, blowing bubbles, or just generally being silly.. usually. Some disadvantages: One may want children immediately, the other may not One may already have children Generation gap - You've seen experienced things that the younger has not and have to explain them... and vice versa. College and career training may not be complete and this could impose things such as long distance relationship, etc. Those are the things that people typically say become a problem. I on the other hand find them to be some of the more interesting and fun aspects of dating someone who's younger than myself. The most important thing is to simply be comfortable and happy with one another and whatever situations may arise :)
@celticeagle (66613)
• Boise, Idaho
12 Apr 10
It could be a big deal. When you figure that women mature faster than men then getting into a relationship with someone younger than you is just silly. You shouldn't have to 'handle' a relationship. It should be 50-50 and how can it be when one is younger? When you are young this would be a bigger problem. If you waited until you were both older and more mature then perhaps things could work better.
@bystander (2259)
• Philippines
12 Apr 10
you can always fall in love with a younger guy... mrs. robinson did with benjamin... it's a may-december affair and there's nothing wrong with it so long as the younger guy loves and trust you... a love that is not only pure but unconditional. always bear in mind that love knows no boundaries, knows no colors, not even age... so, go ahead... but be sure he also loves you... really loves you for what you are and not for what you have...
@erikmama (12942)
• United States
12 Apr 10
Sure it is ok. Age is nothing but a number, as and long as both people are grown, they are free to pick and choose whomever they want to date. If people are compatible they'll be compantible no matter what the age.Each person has their own likes, dislikes, and mentalities, and if both people are on the same page, then it doesn't matter what type of age difference it is. I think once you have passed a certain age a different maturity id there so a couple of years wouldnt make any difference in this type of situation. We cant help who we fall for, no matter their age.
@andy77e (5172)
• United States
12 Apr 10
It can work. It also depends on just how much younger we're talking. If he is too young, you run the risk of him treating you more like his mother, than his wife. You also run the risk of him finding someone younger, and wishing to switch girls. But really, if he's a good mature guy, with good morals and a solid family background, sure why not? As with any relationship, approach this cautiously with eye open. Best of luck to you! :)
• Boston, Massachusetts
12 Apr 10
Hi Hunter, I don't see any problem if the girl is older that boy. my mom is two years older than my dad and their relationship went fine. my dad (when he was still alive) used to tease my mom that "the reason why mom chose him to be her husband was because mom wants to be taken cared of until they aged...since dad is younger than her, he has all the ebnergies to take care of mom". aside from my parents i have relatives and friends who married older women but the relationship is going strong and they are fine!