advice for teenage mom to be..

Philippines
May 10, 2010 9:51pm CST
a few months ago i bumped into a cousins friend. she is seventeen years old and is currently bearing a child, yes, she is pregnant with her fifteen year old boyfriend. the boyfriends mother told the girl that it is not his son's responsibility to support and rise the baby and that she shouldn't make him take in charge of the situation.crud. what advice can you give to my cousins friend?
1 person likes this
8 responses
@Jadxia (39)
• United States
12 May 10
First off, she needs to see if the guy is even interested in being the father. Not talk to the mom, not talk to the dad. Talk to the one who actually donated the sperm. If the boy is willing to man up, then that is a starting point. File for food stamps and state help and let them deal with getting the support money out of him. That is going to be the safest avenue for her, honestly. And just make sure she has the services she needs. Depending on what state and city she is in, there is a various ray of services outside of the government agencies as well. But if he wants his name on the birth certificate, then he needs to be the one to man up, not his parents.
@chulce (1540)
• United States
11 May 10
It scares me to think that I could be in a similar situation, my oldest son and his girlfriend have been together for a while and I worry about him coming to me and telling me that he is going to be a father. However, even though I might be hurt about it. I would support him and his girlfriend and I would let my son know that if can play then he can pay. He needs to stand up to the responsibilities of having a child. Yes, he may also be a child, but he will need to be a grown up as well. Even at a young age like the boy you mentioned only being 15, he can still find a part time job after school at a fast food restaurant or helping with a landscaping company etc. there are ways that he as a 15 year old can help to support that child that will be coming into the world. The one thing that both families need to remember is they need to be supportive of both kids (teens) in this situation, it took both of them to create a child. Now, I am sure the young couple and their parents may talk about all the options that they have available to them. I hope that all works out for them.
@doormouse (4619)
11 May 10
15 is young to become a dad,but he can still step up to his responsibilities,probably not financialy but with love and care for the child,even if he doesn't care for the mother he should still help his child,,at 17 she should be perfectly capable to raise this baby,i did,it wasn't even as hard as i thought it'd be,your cousins friend will be fine
@markleob (1904)
• Philippines
11 May 10
well, they are all young.... that is the award of irrisponsible parents and liberated children.. let me guess these youngsters are not studying and are bystanders.. anyway, that is there already. no matter what happen the two of them made that baby so they should be the ones responsible of that baby.. contrary to what that irresponsible mother of the boy says.. her words only depicts what king of parent she is, IRRESPONSIBLE...
• Philippines
11 May 10
well i think she should ask for her parents help. if his boyfriend doesnt want to take the responsibility of what they've done then she should just focus on her future on how she will continue her life with this new responsibility. at times like this, her family plays a very important role. im sure that her family will not turn their backs on her in times on need specially on situations like these. so she should ask guidance and help from her family, im sure they will help
@icequeen (2843)
• Canada
11 May 10
well first of all the father should be involved. the problem is that they are both very young. they will need the support of friends and family. they should both think about taking a parenting course to learn how to raise a baby...I wish them both good luck...it is a huge responsibility.
• Philippines
11 May 10
just always think that having a baby is a blessing at first she must be stressed, so relatives must assist her, so she will not feel alone.. and for his boyfriend be responsible on that.. you are the father , even though your only a teenager you must be ready for what will be the change on your life.. you made it its your responsibility.. just always assist your cousin.. i think she needs moral support now..
@dorannmwin (36698)
• United States
11 May 10
They are both still nothing but children themselves. Now as far as the boyfriend' mother saying that it is not her son's responsibility to support and raise the child, I feel that she is absolutely incorrect. Once it is proven with certainty that the baby does belong to the boyfriend, then the state where they reside will expect him to support the baby in some way. If he doesn't do this then he is just as apt to get fined for it than is a father that is twice his age. Once you become a parent you really aren't a child anymore.