Long Distance Relationship

Philippines
May 19, 2010 9:51pm CST
This is a relationship thats so hard only few people get to make it work. Currently im in one and i want to make it work although its so hard not having to hold, touch and feel the person i still work hard on making the relationship work. I didn't see her for 2 months now and i know its hard on her cause she really wants to see me. But even though i'm still trying to make her stay and asking her badly to wait for me. All i can do is pray and hope that soon ill have the opportunity to be with her even just for a day or two. But it doesn't end there i'm wishing that some day "long distance relationship" will become "long/lifetime relationship".
2 people like this
17 responses
• Philippines
22 May 10
The hardest love to fall for is long distance love. Relationships are hard work, but when you add distance between the two of you it can become even more complicated. But, who cares? Distance doesn't matter if you really love the person. After all, there are many weapons to fight distance, there are social websites, messengers, cellphones etc.., Distance is really not the problem, it is the TRUST. If you don't trust your partner then there comes the problem for distance. Me, I am also willing to wait for you baby especially now that we've already surpass one year of this relationship. I'm sorry if there are times that I'm always in a hurry, I'm just so desperate to see you again. This relationship will be a lifetime relationship if we want to. It'll work out, just BELIEVE. ;)
• Philippines
22 May 10
I want to see you too ASAP. Don't say sorry its part of this relationship we entered. All we can do now is to toughen up, pray and trust each other no matter what. Im glad that you're willing to wait. n_n It will happen.
@jamed28 (1910)
• Philippines
21 May 10
It is really hard to maintain a long distance relationship. Most of it end up on a break-up. But if they don't end-up that way, they surely develop and strong bond in their relationship. Well the good thing is that technology now a days makes it much easier to have this kind of relationship unlike before.
• Philippines
21 May 10
I agree technology plays a very good role in this relationship. Making us feel closer with every webcam chat and i'm not ending it there soon enough ill be with her!!!
• United States
20 May 10
Like every relationship, it takes two. This doesn't get any truer than in long distance relationships. Distance, absence and fear are what relationships like this should surpass. For instance, making every effort to talk counts. Constant communication is important. Also, if the both of you think your relationship is work MORE than the distance, the absence and the fear, then do all you can. I'm in a long distance relationship. We do miss each other and want to be in the same space so bad but at the same time, just talking online can make everything seem better. I guess the constant feeling of not wanting to get used to this arrangement is a good sign. I love talking to him but I know I don't want to be limited to just this and I know that we'll be seeing each other soon enough anyway!
• Philippines
21 May 10
I want to see her too. So much. Everyday is like torture like one of the response here said but im keeping my hopes up never thinking that i made the wrong choice. I'm making this relationship of our work and i know it would.
@LifeGuru (923)
• Canada
20 May 10
-.- I know how you feel. I've been in a 'long distance relationship' for 5 months now. And I'm just so eager to go see my BF and he's just about as eager to see me too. I really never wanted to be in one since it's really difficult and I do not get to hold him nor sit there and take care of him when he isn't feeling too well. Sure they tell me that I give them a reason to wake up in the morning and they tell me they love me and stuff. Bust sometimes I feel as if it's slowly slipping away, kinda not how it's like for the first 2 months. Since being in long distance relationships can make you think about crazy things about someone you care about since they're far away. -.- He even admitted that he wants to marry me and stuff.. Sure I'm cool with the idea after a year or so... But we both live very different lives also. Him? He's studying is butt off in university and it'll be a while for him to get to travel around and see the world for himself. Me on the other hand, I'm a risk taker, I do things my way or the high way and I try to find a name for myself out there... And I'm kinda an idealist. So it's hard for him and I to want the lives we want. For me, marriage = game over.. No more fooling around, no more crazy lifestyle.. just living life like a responsible adult.. with the 'spouse' on your team trying to make things work for stability and raise a family... T_T Him and I found each other with a messed up twist of fate - I was ready to give up on everything when he came along, we became 'friends' I didn't take him seriously when he started hitting on me and stuff, I pitied him so I gave into his words and stuff, he didn't trust me, till I had to prove to him the next few days that the feelings I felt for him were real since I broke down crying and stuff.. Then boom.. along the way it became an online 'serious' relationship due to crazy circumstances... I never really wanted nor expected going into an online relationship with people since my imaginations aren't too great, and I can't hold or kiss him, caress his face, and all that cliche stuff couples do. It breaks my heart just thinking about stuff that I wouldn't be able to do. I desperately wanna see him and vice versa.. But we both do not have money to go see each other.. So it sucks! It's torture.. XD Like sure, when he's done studying and getting his masters things would be smooth sailing for him.. But what the hell with me? I can't just wait for him and let my waiting drag me down.. I wanna do somethin with my life too! That's why I'm planning on jumping provinces and states while trying to get the skills and training for something I wanna be while working along side with my backup career as a fitness instructor. I've never really been serious with guys online since I knew things would not last for some and some of them are misleading.. I've been in an number of online relationships where I forgot half the names of my 'exes...' But I never really cared nor had counted onliners as actual boyfriends and stuff. But after knowing this guy for a long time and knowing that he'll be true forever and always - coz he got nothing to hide, it's just really really really really REALLY hard on us. I'd like to run away to where he is but my conscience tells me I need money and it's too dangerous to hitchhike all the way there. And I can't really do anything irrational that would give me some sort of criminal record. =p But hey, my advice for you is to try to hold on and follow these tips - it's made many types of relationships last longer than expected: - Poke fun at eachother -- it's good to joke around with the one you love every now and then so it wont be a bore for the both of you. Make life interesting you know? - Notice something different about them -- just simply asking them what's new or complementing them on whatever you notice different about them.. For example new hair, shirt, their display pic, asking them about their day, etc. - Finally... The three little words.. the I love yous - but wait... don't just throw it around constantly, try reminding them why you love them, how you feel for them. =D I heard that advice from someone who has heard of someone who's been in a relationship for 50 years.. Sure the two got married and stuff along those years, so whynot give it a shot and keep the flame going? And just hope and pray that one day you will be able to see your dearly beloved! You must have faith to keep it strong within your heart. ^^ The love for that person is still like the love for your friend but deeper... Like any friendship, it still needs some tender loving care like a plant. If you don't maintain it... It would surely die out. So give them attention, and some space - don't get clingy, and hopefully you'll both be able to see each other some day. Happy Mylotting! And I hope it'll work out for you and her. :D
• Philippines
21 May 10
Wow this is a great response. I read it all and i do some of the stuff you just said to maintain it. Its hard i know and i know she longs for me too. All i'm trying to do everyday is make myself be closer like i'm always there. Thats for the great advice and happy mylotting too.
@sizzle3000 (3040)
• United States
20 May 10
I'm glad that there are people that can make a long distance relationship work. I myself do not put a lot of faith in them however I am bias about them being a mother of a daughter that was in a long distance relationship off and on for three years. He never kept any of his promises and cheated on her with his ex for over half of that time. She gave all her love to him and I would hear her on the phone begging and crying for him not to give up on them and not to leave her. After a few months, she would be doing better and start dating again but it was like he had radar and he would want her back and of course she would. Thankfully he stayed away long enough this time for her to really fall in love and get married to a wonderful guy that I am proud to consider my son in law. For those in a long distance relationship I say this from the bottom of my heart, becareful but be happy. Good luck to all of you.
• Philippines
21 May 10
I dont have plan on cheating on her i love her and thats all that matter ill sacrifice everything if i have to. I want this relationship to work i want to grow old with her. Everything will be alright if i just push more and more effort.
@rhinarea (311)
20 May 10
Me and my boyfriend have been separated for 4 months, i had to go for a vacation outside of the country, and it was harder than i thought we always fight online but still survive it after all, and now were in our 7th year together we are very happy.
• Philippines
21 May 10
We're fighting too and all i do is listen. I listen cause i want to here her part, if she has a problem with what im doing i understand. I don't want her to be the cause of the problem, i always tell her its my fault cause it always is.
@djemme (78)
• United States
20 May 10
Long distance relationships can work, you just need to keep communication open. Skype is a wonderful option and it lets you visit face to face. You mentioned in a reply that you expected this distance to be in your lives for only months. That's not so bad, a good solid relationship can surely survive several months of separation. Be sure you both are looking for the same long term goal, communicate often and keep the trust. Good luck and blessings on your relationship.
• Philippines
21 May 10
Thanks n_n.
@KCruzado (79)
• Philippines
20 May 10
Hi! I have seen a few couples who endured long distance relationships in the past. I think their commitment and passion for their relationship have sustained them. Although, I know it is hard; and as you said, not many are able to surpass this. For many couples, it doesn't make a sense to be in a relationship where you cannot hold and see your partner. And although there is trust with one another, doubt and jealousy cannot be avoided because in reality, they may meet someone interesting, who makes them happy during the absence of the partner. While there are many factors to keeping a relationship healthy, companionship plays a big role in strengthening a relationship. It is true that absence makes the heart grow fonder; however, it is also true that it can make two lovers become strangers to one another. In your case, I believe you two can make it because you have plans on following her wherever she is. Good luck!
• Philippines
21 May 10
I will n_n i found the perfect person to be with and she makes me happy and shes happy with me too. Although its really though being in this kind of relationship im keeping my hopes up that someday ill be there taking care of her and making her happy. n_n
• Philippines
20 May 10
Like you im into online romance too.And i know how you feel about it. But sometimes we dont choose the person we should love,cause if we can, we could just settle for someone near us, but it just doesn't work that way. I think to be able to survive this kind of relationship, both should love more, should trust more and should be more understanding.Its more effort than what we do in real life. My partner can't visit me yet but im willing to wait,and just keep on hoping that someday like you it will be long lifetime relationship.We talk about plans for our future you know. Good luck to us. (^_^)
• Philippines
20 May 10
Wow nice :D
@maean_19 (4662)
• Philippines
20 May 10
I had previously started a similar discussion about this topic quite a long time and definitely can relate based on experience. Certainly, long distance relationships may work out to some and not to others. Surely, I can say that my answer or what I have wrote to my discussion then will not be the same with my answer to your topic now because for some reasons, there existed some changes. Perhaps, my friends here will be mysteriously amazed and ask what happened, but life is like that. We really never know what may happen. For others to know, I have a more than 5 years relationship and actually engaged then. My ex fiancee is working abroad and we planned to get marry when he gets back by October. Unfortunately, things had changed in just one snap. Your hunch is right, we had broke up and no longer engaged. Long distance relationship is hard to maintain and I salute couples who were able to get through or cope up with the distance.Communication does matters, but it is not enough to make the relationship strong.
• Philippines
20 May 10
Its definitely hard but i'll make it work!!!
@p3ks626 (6550)
• Philippines
20 May 10
This discussion again. Wow! Maybe there are a lot of couples having long distance relationship these days. I've seen this discussion made more than just 5 times and I'm seeing it again today.
• Philippines
20 May 10
I made this discussions not knowing that haha
@myramae19 (667)
• Philippines
20 May 10
I'm in a long distance relationship now, his been away for more than 2 years,, all you have to do is to trust each other and keep constant communication..it will work if you really love each other.Hope both of you would overcome every little sadness in life.God bless.
• Philippines
20 May 10
Wow you really love him that much huh? i wish my gf can wait too but i ain't gonna take two years for me to show up again its more of just months. Thanks for sharing that gave me more hope that our relationship can work and good luck with your relationship n_n.
• India
20 May 10
Good to maintain distance in relation but make sure that its not too long. I am living alone from last one month and understand the distance in relations. Earlier I used to think that its just kilometer and if you are not together it's same but Now I realize that distance does take lot from us in relation.
• Philippines
20 May 10
Distance doesn't matter in a relationship. What matters is that you love each other and you are happy with your partner. n_n
@qamarep (4450)
• Pakistan
20 May 10
this is kind of relationshpo because of the mak e a living thing you guys have to stay away
@OConnell87 (1046)
20 May 10
things happen for a reason i'm sure people will tell you that if this relationship is meant to last it will naturally, have you tried such things as skype you would be able to chat whilst seeing each other via webcam
@ddaguno (3110)
• Philippines
20 May 10
I was in one for more than 1 year. There were time when I wanted to give up. But it is true that when you love a person you will keep the relationship alive even if it is hard. We're together now and i'm so happy we didn't break up during the lonely times that were apart.
@krisnel (498)
• Philippines
20 May 10
when in a long distance relationship there should always be a communication between you and the one you love. there should be trust to the both of you.