how far can you and your partner go if you ever are doing Ménage à trois?
By nikramos
@nikramos (698)
Philippines
November 4, 2010 10:51pm CST
first things first, i dont want to give the impression that i am doing it. i havent, which is why im curious (as always) to know what others think about it.
years ago i thought of having it as a gift to my ex. i tried to talk to him about it because i was having second thoughts but i know he would love it if we would. if im not comfortable with it then he wouldnt push me into it. i had a lot of conditions set prior to agreeing but i ended up not wanting to do it.
basically i was too afraid he might like the other girl or that she will do better than i will in bed. in the end i just thought maybe he can just watch a girl on girl thing for real, lol, and we can finish the rest. i cant stand seeing him kissing or doing the deed with another and it might ruin the whole "special gift" idea like it's supposed to be. i cant just do it casually and i dont want to risk my relationship with him even if i know it's one of his wishes.
how would you deal with it if your partner requested for it(not force you to)? respect between the couple wont be a problem as both will consent to the act itself but what will be the limits if ever you agree?
1 person likes this
7 responses
@frontvisions101 (16043)
• Philippines
5 Nov 10
I never thought you were the type nik. Lol. You have some naughty bones in you, i gotta say. I've done threesome once. The deed was very exhausting i had to drink 2 bottles of red bull and it was with 2 girls with no emotional connection. It was fun but exhausting.
1 person likes this
@frontvisions101 (16043)
• Philippines
5 Nov 10
Ok, ok. I understand. :) it's all good. Just want you to know i'm open if you decided to do something like this again. Jk
@nikramos (698)
• Philippines
5 Nov 10
im definitely not the type you assume. i embrace my sexuality but i dont do it for fun thank you. i dont see it as anything bad as i also have my limits. wanting to please my partner then made me think of fulfilling one of his greatest fantasies. all for the love of him. but since i cant do it casually (like you did), i was bound by a lot of conditions and realized i really cant. it better remain a fantasy than ruin our relationship. but its a lesson learned now. was just wondering what others would think about it.
1 person likes this
@pjnjclyn (176)
• Newton, New Jersey
5 Nov 10
We have had one and the thing was we sat down and talked about it really talked I mean it took us more then 6 months before anything happened. You might say that is a long time but I wanted to make sure that there where ground rules that would not be broken. We did it together I mean this was not going to ruin my marriage.
Some of the rules where as followed
the woman could not be a friend or live in the same city
there could be no kissing
she could not be alone with him
there where more if you like I will share.
All that I am saying is make sure that you know what you are doing first take you time and do not jump into anything it will be better for the both of you in the long run
1 person likes this
@shaggin (71663)
• United States
21 Nov 10
How come you only did it once and never again? I am just curious. How in the world did you find someone to do this with if it wasent a friend and didnt live in the same city? I dont want to do things like this with a friend either so I understand that it would just make things uncomfortable after. Thats good that you didnt allow kissing as that is to me a pretty personal thing to share. I'd want to kiss the girl but I wouldnt have wanted my husband to kiss her. LOL I guess I should have just done a girl on girl thing and let him watch.
@rameshkumaar57 (5908)
• India
5 Nov 10
My partner will never accept doing Menage a trois. She is quite possesive and once we were talking about it, and she told me, that she will never accept it. The fact was she told me that she will leave me, even if I start having an affair with another woman, so Menage a trois is a no no as far as I am concerned with my partner.
But at the same time, I had had menage a trois when I visited Bangkok, and visited a massage parlour. Let me tell you that experience was some thing out of the world, when you have a sandwich massage, in those parlours.
1 person likes this
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
5 Nov 10
nikramos to me these p eople who want to play around are asking for trouble in their marriages. why not just come out and say you are boring and I want out,at least this wou ld be more honest than that yucky mess of the menage of three. what a sick way of doing and it turnes my stomach as a widow of many years, I cannot think that many people can really be this blase about the whole thing not to mention sort of stupid plan that this is an excellent way of picking up nasty stds too . no nikramos if my partner wanted to do that I would just say okay count me out and let u s just say bye bye nice knowing you. I would not agree to such a sick endeavor and would not be one of the menage at all. if he wanted to do that fine, but not with me and not in my house. he would be finding a new wife as I would let him go in a flash., I am no fool,. if a man wants this let him go. I do not want this crap myself. not at all.
the whole idea is ludicrous and i would not be part of this sick thinking.
@nikramos (698)
• Philippines
5 Nov 10
i understand your total rejection of the idea.
i was hit right on for having thought of doing it but only if well-defined rules are set.
nevertheless, i wasnt offended you had such opinion. i completely respect your views regarding the whole matter. :)
1 person likes this
@swissheart (6482)
• Romania
5 Nov 10
this depends on what you had decided before: if it involves only touching or even psomething more. anyway I couldn't do it. in a one man and two women ( me with another girls ) I would feel the need to grab that woman by the hair and get her out of the room, and in a one woman and two man I would feel as a hooker so I wouldn;t try it at all.
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@nikramos (698)
• Philippines
5 Nov 10
whew, what a scene... i dont think i can grab a woman by her hair, im afraid she will be stronger than i am and i dont wana risk breaking my bones for something that can be outright embarrassing. id rather leave them alone and leave the relationship.
1 person likes this
@KellieWilson (98)
• United States
5 Nov 10
Any time you invite another person into your relationship you are asking for trouble. The idea in general is one thing, and of course its a fantasy every man has, and some women as well, but fantasy and reality are two different things. Whenever the lines of fidelity are blurred, it becomes easier in the future to go even further past the set boundaries.
That being said, if you ever do decide to do this, be safe and make rules that you can live with after. If you let something slide simply because it's what your man wants, you may end up very resentful after the fact.
1 person likes this
@cyrri_ako (461)
• Philippines
5 Nov 10
this will be a big no no for both of us..we're both jealous and protective of each other......
