so called "friends"

@ren1982 (341)
January 4, 2011 2:30pm CST
i hate those kind of friends that just dont listen when you are talking to them at all. and then try and deny it grrrrr last night i had a friend over and like many times before while i am sitting theree talking to him he just looks at the telly and nods his head and says yea here and there but i know full well he isnt listening to me last night while i was talking and i could see he was watching the telly i even said i am talking to myself here and your not even listening and he said nothing but what i was trying to ask him was about a dvd to put on. so about 45mins later he turns to me and says about when i am going to put the dvd on. i told him then that i asked before but he wasnt listening. and what does he say? he sits there and tells me that he was listening! i couldnt believe he was going to deny it! so i turned around and told him what i said while he wasnt listening to me and he just sat there and said sorry. if this only happened every now and then i wouldnt mind but it happens every time he comes over but yet if he calls me on the phone we can sit there for hours talking. i just dont get it do you have friends like this? how do you deal with it when you really like the person and dont just want to get rid of them?
3 responses
@coffeebreak (17798)
• United States
5 Jan 11
MY husband does that all the time...and even admits to me later when I bring it up that he wasnt listening to me! But when he talks to me... he prefaces and continually questions with "are you listening to me?" "do you hear me?" and I am supposed to say yes. He makes a statement that requires no response so I don't respond and he'll say "do you hear me?" I say "yes" and it ends there. Other times he will say "well you didn't say anything" and i say "it didn't require a response nor did you ask for one". So now I have turned the tables on him and I will say "do you hear me?" and he doesn't even get it. Even my grand daugher told me the other day when she was here 'Why does papa always ask if you are listening?"
1 person likes this
@ren1982 (341)
5 Jan 11
yea my friend is like that. i just cant stand it. i think what i might try and do is just stop talking if i think he isnt listening or when he talks to me next i might just sit there and watch the telly!!!
@bounce58 (17387)
• Canada
6 Jan 11
Haha! I just posted a discussion about bad news becoming white noise... Maybe he thinks this way too! When people or 'friends' talk, they tune them out and it just becomes white noise. And they just bob their head to appear to be listening. I also hate not being heard. But if they are friends, I grant them a once or twice offense of not listening. But if they are like that all the time, then maybe it's time that we're not friends anymore.
• United States
5 Jan 11
You could take the phone away from them and tell them they have to get it from you. You might try telling them that you value their input and could use it on something specific. You could try talking about things their interested in. Hope this helps