What to do?! :|
By Madmax73
@Madmax73 (280)
Romania
March 23, 2011 4:00pm CST
Ok so the thing is that, 2 weeks ago i met a girl named (i'll give the name cuz nobody cares) Lorena. My brother told me about her, that she's nice, she's single etc. etc....
Sooo, what to do? Let's meet!:D We met at a zoomba party(dancing and thing like that). We clicked, there was a thing, i liked her, she liked me, we ended that night with a kiss on the cheek:D.
Next day we met again, we talked, we laughed, and at last...we kissed. Everything is cool but she is a professional dancer, she is training for 15 years, and now she has 2 shows in april, and another thing, she wants to leave to country by fall.
She told me that our relationship is useless cuz she will leave and it's not gonna be a good thing, cuz we'll start caring for each other.
I told her that i respect her decision although i don't agree.
After 2-3 days we kept talking and she told me that she would want to see me...so we meet again. She invited me at her house, drank some wine, she got drunk(don't worry, nothing happend), we kissed...it was fun. But, what was this? just for fun? am i in a relationship? What should i do? we didn't talk about that night, and i am afraid to do it, becuz i don't know what she's gonna say.
2 people like this
13 responses
@kalyani1234 (637)
• India
24 Mar 11
Hello Madmax, it seems like you do like her truly and from the fact that although she told you that the relations between you too is useless and not good, she still asked to see after 2-3 days, it really means that she too likes you. But what seems to be holding her back is that she is a professional dancer, practising and working for so many years and is really committed to her vocation. She may be feeling that getting into relationship with you will have an effect on her dancing, which is why she is either being noncommittal or is clearly confused about you.
If you feel uncomfortable just don't talk about it yourself. Give her time and the space that she needs. She needs to sort out her feelings herself, maybe if her liking is really intense and truwe, she will come back upfront about it. For now, like everyone else has said, enjoy the moments spent with her and make it worthwhile while you are at it.
@kalyani1234 (637)
• India
25 Mar 11
OMG! Madmax, I am truly sorry for you that things did not work out well with you! I truly am. I just hope that you get over it sooner! DOn't take it to heart much, evidently her career is more important for her!
@LeighB (700)
• Thailand
23 Mar 11
Hi Max,
From what you have said I would think that she is a nice girl who obviously has feelings for you, but...She would like to form a relationship with you but knows she has other roads to travel. It seems as if she hasn't yet come to terms with the fact that she will be leaving and hoefully living in a new country. If I was you I would try and distance my feelings and view her just as a friend. She has been honest with you, saying it can not lead anywhere, but at the same time is playing with your emotions. If a friendship is not what you want with her then your best bet is to look for someone who will be staying in your country and whom you can have a relationship with.
Affairs of the heart are never easy.
Good luck mate.
@Madmax73 (280)
• Romania
23 Mar 11
I could start dancing lessons?:D This could work:| By fall i can i be a professional dancer:| yeah, this is a good idea... Kinda hard to do...The thing is that she's gonna give me signs, u know, those kinda signs, when your like : What to do?:| she wants me, she doesn't. The way she speaks, the way she looks at me. I have a bad habit to observe every detail on a person...and i noticed these.
@LeighB (700)
• Thailand
25 Mar 11
Sorry to hear things didn't go the way you wanted, Max. But at least you are getting out before it developed too deeply. It is never easy when love is a one way street and two people are not on the same page, but I think you made a wise decision. Obviously she has mapped out her future and has dreams to persue that unfortunately don't include you.
Hope you find the girl of your dreams soon.
Good luck!
@raviteja_ravi84 (2620)
• India
24 Mar 11
Well it sounds as if you both had a good time and as a mylotter said above enjoy every moment with her. I think maybe you want to give your relationship a shot and see how it works out. It's the feeling that counts between both of you. I suggest that you go ahead play it out and see what happens.
Cheers!
Cheers!
@adnileb (5256)
• Philippines
24 Mar 11
Maybe you should ask her if that was all that she wanted, like friendship and nothing else. If yes, then just enjoy the moments with her. Soon she'll fall for you I'm sure and would want it deeper than friendship. If she's undecided of what to answer, maybe she wants you to become more that friends. 
Just enjoy the fun being with her. And tag her as a friend. Don't expect too much on your relationship with her so you'll not get disappointed if it ends.
Best wishes! 
Just enjoy the fun being with her. And tag her as a friend. Don't expect too much on your relationship with her so you'll not get disappointed if it ends.
Best wishes! 
@tacojass (6)
• United States
23 Mar 11
well has she called u since that night? did she say she enjoyed being with u and likes ur company? me as a girl will tell u that if she said that it wasent going to work and then she called cause she wanted to see u is because thats a verry good sign and it means she want to try it out first kissing is a good thing if it happened more than once i think u should call her up again bring her some flowers and take it from there she will be going on the trip but is she coming back?
@cream97 (29087)
• United States
24 Mar 11
Hi. Madmax73. I think that you should have a serious heart to heart talk with her. If you feel that you want to pursue a long distance relationship with her as she is in another country, then you should make this known to her. I understand that you don't want to push her into being with you, if she feels that it is not going to work. If you are interested in being with her while she is away then tell her so. I mean, she is leading you on and you have no choice but to think that she wants you in more than a friendly type of way. If she does not want to pursue a relationship with you any further, then she should stop making the moves on you. Otherwise, you are going to continue to fall in love with her and you will develop an stronger attraction to her.
@aerous (13434)
• Philippines
26 Mar 11
Feel yourself if you really got a feeling with this girl. I mean if you really love her...why you didn't talk about that things before she left?
I think your in love with her. Because as read your post. It seems that you really want that girl...
I suggest you to find a way to have a good communication with the girl. Ask her the situation before she go? If she's willing to continue...good. If she's not..good thing also because your not assuring something...
@jaiho2009 (39142)
• Philippines
23 Mar 11
I think she likes you,but she loves her passion "dancing".
She's not yet ready to sacrifice her career in return for love.
So,if you are really meant for each other,you will be together someday.
Only TIME can tell,and LOVE will bring her back into your arms.
@ddaguno (3107)
• Philippines
24 Mar 11
Well my friend, if you are meant for each other then you will meet again someday.
some people survive long distance relationships but some end up devastated so if she is not ready to commit in a relationship with you just let her go and after her work as a dancer, if both of you are still single, then you can be together again.
@sweetyellow (86)
• Philippines
25 Mar 11
Ohh! I guess you like her and maybe she does, but apparently she's leaving for a moment so what happen is you end up hanging. You can talk about it especially what happen between you on that night. Maybe she's something up to and she cant either tell you or whatever. You might have the same feeling together scare of the next step and you jump into conclusion of what she will say..:)
@yopyyop (187)
• Romania
23 Mar 11
The best thing I can say for you in this moments is to live every second like it was the last one. Stay as much as you can with Lorena and spend more time with her because feelings are the most important thing in the life. You don't know what is going to happen and she could stay there and not going on fall. Just try your luck and feel good because she will do the same, I am sure!
@NewAgePatriot (14)
• United States
24 Mar 11
Live the moment. She isn't looking for a serious relationship. Based on the story you two just met anyway. Look at it like a FWB (friend with benefits) kind of deal.
