Torn Between a FRIEND and a LOVER
By xien2xien
@xien2xien (1382)
Philippines
May 17, 2011 11:38pm CST
I've never felt contented like this before, I have a wonderful family, A bestfriend who i can lean on and stay by my side no matter what and a perfect lover who loves me and i'm totally in love with.
Though i admit i'm being torn with this friend of mine. She was very insecure and very jealous of me, way back before i give in a love of a man just because she told me that she loves him, but after i give in she didn't actually get the love of this man away from me. And now i'm finally loving someone who really loves me too but sadly this friend again is keeping in between us because she likes this guy too, she's doing everything she can to break us, my bestfriend was really upset with her and even told me to never talk to her again, i'm really confuse of what should i do, i'm sad knowing that she was too selfish to not support me this time like the way i supported her before when i turn down someone just for her. I just can't give up this man for her this time, i know that i will regret it someday if i did it, i can't afford to let go of this perfect man that makes me complete and i knew that i made him complete too.
I really need your advice fellow mylotters, i wanted to know of what will you do if you were in my case please.
4 people like this
12 responses
@xien2xien (1382)
• Philippines
18 May 11
Friend....
I'm really in love this time, and i was into a great and fast transformation of being a bad chick into a perfect girl... my bestfriend was happy for me this time, because she sees me being good this time i don't know what to do with this friend, but all i need is the support of my parents and my bestfriend, and i have it, so i'm willing to fight for this man as long as i have all the right to fight for him
I'm really in love this time, and i was into a great and fast transformation of being a bad chick into a perfect girl... my bestfriend was happy for me this time, because she sees me being good this time i don't know what to do with this friend, but all i need is the support of my parents and my bestfriend, and i have it, so i'm willing to fight for this man as long as i have all the right to fight for him
@xien2xien (1382)
• Philippines
18 May 11
thanks friend, but don't get envy at me, i knew you've experienced this before. and i know how wonderful feeling you've also feel.... i just wished this could last a lifetime
@zed_k4 (17589)
• Singapore
18 May 11
You have a good heart , still thinking of giving her a chance at friendship , but you're not willing to give up this guy this time. Give her a good ear-lashing then. Tell her how you feel about the whole situation and that you're not going to give up this guy. However , you still want to retain friendship with her.
If she backs off , then it's for the best of both of you. Why do you have to give yourself an option , when it's her that has to make the decision. All the best for you and the guy. Go get him , tiger ..hihi .. just a saying.
@xien2xien (1382)
• Philippines
19 May 11
first of all, all the talking and explanation is done with this friend i used the most simple yet appropriate words to let her know my side and how much i needed her support on me this time.
second.... i don't need to get him, because i've already got him and he's already mine and i'm already his
@laydee (12798)
• Philippines
18 May 11
I think it's time for her to realize that she can't get everything she wants. I can't believe you feel that she's your bestfriend when all she does is be envious or jealous of you?
I think you need to put your foot down this time and tell her up front that she can't do that to you anymore. You need to realize that these types of friends would only bring you down and you need to let go of her.
@xien2xien (1382)
• Philippines
18 May 11
i'm sorry if you misunderstood my discussion, my bestfriend was a different person from this FRIEND. my bestfriend was always at my side and always wanted me to be happy and supported everything that can makes me happy, this friend is different she was too insecure but i can't blame her
1 person likes this
@xien2xien (1382)
• Philippines
19 May 11
she wanted me to dump him just because way back before she had this puppy love thing with this guy, but this guy never likes or loved him before and he didn't even take a single look at her way, so in the end process she became bitter with this guy, so when this guy court me she's telling me dump him, but i really think that she wants me to dump him just because she was jealous of this guy courting me and loving me instead of her
@chuyins123 (2112)
• Philippines
18 May 11
As I have already commented on your other discussion, just bring the matter to your friend. Communicate every view that you have on the matter, and express your firm decision in front of her. It's just make or break. And she really cares for you and the friendship? It shouldn't be the one to hinge your friendship.
This is the time when you should be able to know, whether it's a friendship for real you have with her. Things will pretty work out for better if properly communicated. Go my friend! Express yourself, not just here in mylot but also to the person involve.
God bless you. Hope all will be well with you and your friend and your relationship soon. :)
chuyins
@xien2xien (1382)
• Philippines
19 May 11
things are kinda weird for us right now my friend..... you know what, last saturday me and joel (the man i'm referring in my discussion) arranged a bonding time with shiely (my friend), the day went well, we had a great time, we try to explain our side, and there was a moment that i talk to shiely alone in the corner, i had explain everything to her, i admit that i love this man, and i wanted her to support our relationship since she was my friend, she said yes and at the end of the day i thought that the problem was already fixed so we can go on with our lives..
sadly after two days, shiely send a text message to joel, saying that "I HATE YOU JOEL, WHY DID YOU HAVE TO COME BACK AGAIN AND HURT ME, WHY DID I HAVE TO SEE YOU AGAIN I HATE YOU SO MUCH AND I WON'T SUPPORT YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH AYCE
@feeltheirie (301)
• Philippines
18 May 11
It would be best for you to talk to this friend of yours. Tell her how you feel about this guy. If she really is a true friend, she would understnd and not stand between the two of you. However, if she still insist that you give up this man, then she is not a true friend. She is selfish and she does not want to see you happy. Your other friend may then be right for you not to associate yourself to her.
@xien2xien (1382)
• Philippines
18 May 11
i would like to say to you the same thing i responded to my first responder STOWYK.... i pity this friend, because i think she would loose all of her friend when she looses me, cause all my friend befriend her just because of me, without me they won't never look at her way. i pity her, because i felt like i have everything like ive said i have a wonderful family a trusted bestfriend and now a perfect lover, and when i look at her side her family never wanted her, she has no bestfriend, and she has no lover, so i never wanted to bring her down that's why i'm always forgiving her and always understanding her situation
@chiyosan (30184)
• Philippines
18 May 11
I am sorry i have to say y this to you but i think she is not your friend and i think she is just trying to make you miserable because that is probably what she is right now. She should not be wanting the things you have and is taking them away from you.
@sender621 (14894)
• United States
18 May 11
We lean on so many different relatrionships in our lives. one is really not any more m=important than another, freinds and lovers are both of value to our lives. Love can begin and end while a friendship can remain endlessly. @kingparker (9673)
• United States
18 May 11
She is a selfish person after I read your discussion. You already gave up your perfect life once for her, and certainly you don't have to do it this time. If she is your good friend, she should support you like you said it. She should be happy for you. Not for herself. Well, maybe you should stay away from this person. She is not your good friend anymore.
@snowhybiscuis (1882)
• Philippines
18 May 11
Your friend seems to be a selfish person. If she's a real friend, then she will make the sacrifice and be happy seeing her friend happy.
Have you talked to your friend and told her how much you value your lover and that you would appreciate it if you get her support in your relationship? If she's a real friend, she will stand aside.
I suggest you strongly tell your friend how much you feel towards your partner. If she's a real friend, she will understand you. If she will not give way, I suggest that you talk to your lover about your friend. Get his commitment towards you. Then you ease yourself away from your friend little by little. Your partner can be your good friend if you are both loyal to each other. Yes, you may lose your friend but you will gain one from your partner.
Hope you'll be able to resolve your dilema. Regards.
