I get so jealous of my husbands time

United States
May 31, 2011 5:39pm CST
Im a stay at home Mom of two children 8 and 5. My husband is in the Navy. We have been together for 10 years so this isnt anything new with him coming and going. I notice though when its close to him leaving I become more possesive. I dont want him spending time with anyone else. I just want him spending time with the kids and I. This is selfish since he needs time too. We play an online game with friends from Wa where we just moved from. I play sometimes as well. I get so upset when he comes home and just goes straight for the comp and than his friend calls him and soon hes talking to him and than getting into a game while Im left dealing with the kids, housework and preparing dinner. I eventually reach a point though where I dont even want his attention since he spent most his time with his friend after being gone all day. I dont know what to do. I feel he shld have his time to unwind from work, but talking to me would be nice too.
8 responses
• China
1 Jun 11
Hi,tink1879. Don't be upset, cheer up. Once you feel happy yourself,you can find a good way to talk to your husband.I think maybe you too can plan one day or two,leaving your children to your parents or your babysiter,then just you two,have a good time and talk to each other,you can tell your husband how you feel about you now,I think it 's a good way to work out the proplems . Good luck for you!
@SIMPLYD (83052)
• Philippines
1 Jun 11
If i were on your shoes, i would feel the same too. I would like his last days of stay to be spent just for me and the kids. Perhaps you could talk to him about this. He will surely understand and schedule the day with friends earlier and make them understand too that he needs exclusive time with you and the kids. His friends will surely understand too.
@kumakuma (84)
• Malaysia
1 Jun 11
why not you plan activities with your family? for example, asking him to go buy groceries with you and kids or going out to the park as family one day vacation. I think that would be nice for you and kids also.
@bingskee (5237)
• Philippines
1 Jun 11
you have to talk. you have to tell him than just wallow in your disappointments and frustration. there is nothing that cannot be resolved with communication.
• United States
1 Jun 11
i know how you feel, I felt that way about my husband too. He would come home and jump on his video games and play all night on them. we hardly had time to ourselves. I finally had enough and talked to him about it. Yes, we argued because he felt like I was telling him that he couldn't play his games, but that wasn't the case. I was just reminding him that he does have a wife that needs attention to. Have you tried talking to him? if that doesn't work then try reverse psychology on him.. basically do the same thing to him. I guarantee he want like it and that might get him to thinking. There also could be a reason why he is doing it that he isn't telling you. Good or bad I would try to find out if there is a reason.
@dodo19 (33608)
• Beaconsfield, Quebec
1 Jun 11
It is somewhat understandable why you feel this way. I think though that you should maybe talk to him, and figure out some plan where you guys can spend time together and he can still spend time with his friends. Just tell him how you feel and take it from there.
• United States
31 May 11
There are somethings we have to deal with in life. Sharing is one of them. I am sure you could use more help with the kids. I think he should have the time he needs with friends and family since he is the one leaving home. It is natural to be jealous in life. but selfish we can control.
@peavey (16866)
• United States
31 May 11
You need to let him know how you feel. Let him know that you'd like a hand with the kids (they're his, too) and that you don't feel appreciated when he walks in and heads straight to the computer and his friends while you're left to deal with everything else. He probably doesn't realize what he's doing so it's up to you to let him know.