whenever a friend asks you, "is it a yes or a no?"
By katzar0712
@katzar0712 (324)
Philippines
July 10, 2011 1:57am CST
how do you respond with this type of question, especially when it's blurted out of the blue?
one of my friends ask me this and i had a slight idea why all of a sudden she is running a survey of yes or no.
i answered no, because again i had an idea what she's up to.
at the end of the shift, she collected more NO responses than YES responses.
and she looked upset. some asked her why and what the survey is all about. she defended that if you answered NO it shows that you are a negative person, if you answered YES then you are a positive person. WHATT!?
the following day, I found out the reason why she felt upset with the results. she actually wanted to know if she will pursue "someone" based on our responses. she believed that if she revealed the true reason behind that "yes or no" survey we will definitely question her. indeed!
my final words for her that day is, "You should take responsibility in ALL areas of your life."
I hope she learns from this.
1 person likes this
6 responses
@carmelanirel (20942)
• United States
10 Jul 11
That's crazy, I'd never answer a question with a yes or no without knowing what the question was. Plus, it isn't being negative to say no, not when as far I as knew, she was asking me to do something I don't want or can't do..
@carmelanirel (20942)
• United States
11 Jul 11
Well, she opened herself up by not being clear on the question, so she shouldn't be upset by all the "no's" she got..
@katzar0712 (324)
• Philippines
10 Jul 11
she blurted the question out of the blue. afterwards, she even posted it in Facebook to get more responses. i normally wouldn't answer too, if i don't know the real deal, but i have an idea what she's up to. so i answered no. maybe that's the reason why she admitted the real situation to me after surveying others...
1 person likes this
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
10 Jul 11
hi kat z she will get no answer at all from me unless she tells
mne what is a yes or a no! I will not be trapped like that
specially from a fellow co worker. I have to know what I am yes or
noing about first berforee giving my answers at all.She should have
trusted her own instincts and not based it on her co workers at all.
@katzar0712 (324)
• Philippines
10 Jul 11
clearly she wants US to decide for HER, right? that's why i told her to take responsibilities in all areas of her life. we are her friends, we can give advise but up to that extent only.
@beeduzhe (138)
• China
12 Jul 11
I think your friend is a negative person,how could she made such a decision based on an ambiguous question? If she really wanted to pursue "someone",she should be brave to do that!Whenever a friends asds me such a question, I must get to know what the "yes" means and what the "no" means before I make my answer.And I agree that we should love our life!
beeduzhe
@sanjay91422 (2725)
• India
10 Jul 11
I don't know, it depends on the question they ask from me. I don't have a favorite among the two "yes" and "No".
I think your friend is crazy or maybe she is reading some psychology book. Maybe she is researching some theory. Girls don't have much work other than reading and applying the psychology on the other people.
@katzar0712 (324)
• Philippines
10 Jul 11
whoa.. im also a girl, i also love reading... but applying psychology esp to other people? errr..... ahaha.
i think the reason she did what she did is because she cant decide for herself...
@devinim (79)
• India
10 Jul 11
hi friend
the answer for such a question really depends upon our then situation. if my mind is happy then i will answer yes, otherwise no. but deciding things with these responses is not correct. i liked ur last advice to her, "you should take responsibility in all areas of ur life". it is the best u could say. we should decide things by self, or should ask friends openly, not by an yes or no survey.
@katzar0712 (324)
• Philippines
10 Jul 11
true. i answered NO because i have an idea what she's surveying about.
it could have been nicer though if she discussed her real situation and received "motivating" responses from us, rather than beating around the bush...
@hardworker1972 (311)
• United States
10 Jul 11
I think it would depend on the question. I am a really blunt honest person so if I think that the answer will hurt her feelings I would answer it honestly and then explain why I answered the way I did. If she is really my friend then she will know that I don't mean harm and am just being honest.
@katzar0712 (324)
• Philippines
10 Jul 11
do you think that since she beat around the bush (surveying instead of asking our opinions about her current dilemma) she doesnt trust us enough? does she feel that if she reveals the truth we wont understand her?
