True love ruin everything ....?

@Olleenz (3398)
Indonesia
August 10, 2011 3:52pm CST
Do you believe in true love? What if you find your true love but impossible for you to reach it? Can you forget it just like that or this kind of love ruin your life? The truth is it happening to me and ruin my life. Long time ago I meet very nice girl. In 10 scale, her outlook she only had 7 but on inside she had 12. We then dating in quite some time (about 3 years) and never had a fight. When I close to to her, my life look so easy(specially on study and making money). But suddenly we realize something that our relationship can't continue to marriage (sorry can't tell you why but basically is about family and religion). We decide to break-up. Every time I meet a new girl, consciously or not, I always compare her with my true love and at the end we always had fight and break-up. Some people say the wound in the heart can be cured by time, but it seems this doesn't apply to me. My true love ruin my life ........ that for sure.
1 person likes this
13 responses
@pibi713 (187)
• China
18 Sep 11
Does she get married now? Is there any hope that you can be together with her again. If the answer is yes, you should do something. It is so hard for us to leave our true love walk away from our life. If keep loving her and you will have hopes.
@Olleenz (3398)
• Indonesia
18 Sep 11
She already married now and have one kid but I don't want to ruin her life/marriage. It better that way as long she happy. But if her husband doing something bad to her, he gonna get BIG PROBLEM from me.
@pibi713 (187)
• China
19 Sep 11
I am sorry to know that she is married. Since she has been married you should move on. Next time go out with a girl that you really have something for her. I know you might feel it's different. It probably for the best, a different girl can give you something unexpected. I know that your ex-girl is so great and special for you, but actually there are so many nice girls in the world. I am sure you will find the right person.
@jonahh08 (261)
• Philippines
11 Aug 11
In your heart and mind, you have to let her go. That doesn't mean you're gonna forget about her, it only means that you've accepted the fact that she can no longer be with you. It's not love that's ruining you're life, it's YOU! Your doing that to yourself, not love. And if you really love her you have to have to be happy for her because you let her go for her own good. I remember a quote from fellow mylotter: "One form of loving is when you just want the best for that person, even if it includes you or not".
1 person likes this
@Olleenz (3398)
• Indonesia
11 Aug 11
I guess you're right ..... seem like my heart and my mind not ready to release her. Well .... it mean I must work hard on this one. Even right now I'm blank on how to do it, I gonna find the way ..... or do have any advise for me?
@enigma13 (372)
• Philippines
11 Aug 11
Giving your response the + rating was not enough for me jonahh08. Your response inspired me. Three cheers for you and the myLotter who provided the quote!
@bird123 (10632)
• United States
12 Aug 11
I question whether you really had true love. Let me explain. True love finds a way through all obstacles because true love is set up by God. The interaction has so much chemistry that people always get back together. Point number two. Your true love is there to help you learn and grow through life. That usually takes some drama. If you never fight with your true love, you probably have the wrong one. Strange as it sounds,that's reality. Go ahead and compare the girls in your life. That won't matter. When true love arrives, nothing will be better. You must be patient. True love has no timetable. Sometimes it won't show up until later in life. It tends to show up when you least expect it.
1 person likes this
@Olleenz (3398)
• Indonesia
12 Aug 11
In life, you can't have everything you like/want, sometime you must let it go. In my case, I decide to release her for good. But you're right, this love change me how to see life and how to deal with it. Thank for your attention and support.
@katie0 (5203)
• Japan
23 Dec 11
Religion? Dear you can't let that happen, God loves all the same He doesn't want us apart. If you love her you must try, you belong with her... don't suffer for this, please, I'm a romantic but also I believe in unconditional love and that means God is in all religions. I really hope you end up with her.
1 person likes this
@Olleenz (3398)
• Indonesia
23 Dec 11
She already marriage with someone else (an arranged marriage by her parents). I don't want to ruin her life. I hope she happy with that guy ..
11 Aug 11
hi olleenz:) I don't really know what goes wrong between you too, but I think if the cause of your break-up is religion then maybe it's wrong, because one could always sacrifice or if not,convert to that certain religion if you really love each other that much, if you still love this woman and you still have chance to get back together why not just do that than look for other that you really cannot love as much as you love her? not all wounds will be heal by time, and that kind of pain and love will always go back to haunt you if you don't pursue her, but if she's already committed now, then you can't do anything about that than to move on. so all I could say to you now is just follow your heart and goodluck.
@adhyz82 (36249)
• Indonesia
12 Sep 11
Ollenz, so you want change your religion because someone else and not because you know that your new religion is better than yours??
@Olleenz (3398)
• Indonesia
12 Sep 11
Hi Adhyz, I think we all only had one God, religions only ways(or can I say roads ?) to reach HIM.
11 Aug 11
Yes it is true that true love is out there and the girl you were in love with may have been the one and its also true that true love can hurt you more than anything, it can break your heart, but what is meant to be will be youare the only person in charge of your life you make your own decsisions, you may not think now that there is another girl out there for you but you will find her and when you do you will you will be happier then ever. Just keep trying and never give up on love it will find you when the time is right.
1 person likes this
@Olleenz (3398)
• Indonesia
11 Aug 11
You're different from other. When other said that I must pursue girl which really much with all my strength, you give word that can warm my heart. Thanks for your support.
@salonga (27775)
• Philippines
10 Aug 11
Family and religion separated the two of you? I would say your love could not be really true because I can't avoid but question why you can't agree to sacrifice religion and family if you really do love each other. Why can't either the two of you give in to stretch out whatever differences your religion and family has. Oh well, that is a personal thing but this I would say... unless one is willing to sacrifice everything for the sake of love then to me that is not love in the real sense of the word.
@Olleenz (3398)
• Indonesia
11 Aug 11
The fact was I ready to sacrifice everything just for her but she can't and I must face this fact. Even I can force her to agree with my runaway marriage proposal, I'm not quite sure she gonna happy with me because she still bounded with her past life. We already discuss our problem (about 1.5 month) but nothing positive result.
@kingparker (9673)
• United States
10 Aug 11
Since you said she is your true love, why can't you marry her, only because both your families rejected such idea of you both fall in love and get married, and the religion should not be a matter. No religion should rejected people with different belief to get married either. So, overall, she might not be your true love. Maybe your true love hasn't shown yet. Good luck!
@Olleenz (3398)
• Indonesia
10 Aug 11
In my country, family bless (specially your parents) and religion is very important and we both believe it. In my country also belief that younger brother can't marriage before older brother and this also cost me problem (I'm the youngest of 5). I already try to offer runaway marriage to her but she said no and start crying. thank for your support .... I'll still trying to find the right one ....hehehehe
@iamsummer (192)
11 Aug 11
Let the past becomes past,don't reconsider it.There has one motto said,when there has a scar already,everytime you try to mend the scar you will stab pain of the scar again.Don't let the ex-girlfriends influence your mate selection standard.When the princess you love appearing in the future,you should hold on the chance ,never let it slip away.Good luck.
12 Aug 11
Oh,if so,you should put all the resistance away and tell her you love her again.
@Olleenz (3398)
• Indonesia
11 Aug 11
Well,it could be a problem to me. She already made influence on my life. Any suggestion ...?
@jazzyrae (1745)
• United States
11 Aug 11
If you are really in love don't let anything stop you.
@Olleenz (3398)
• Indonesia
11 Aug 11
Every action you made had consequences. If my action might hurt her and she not ready for it, I won't do it. Love is not just about take, but also about give.
@jazzyrae (1745)
• United States
11 Aug 11
yes it dose, what if i told you i was in your same position less than a year ago. I fell in love at the age of 16 i live in the u.s.a the boy i fell in love with his familly had little money so did mine. My mom wanted me to marry a doctor or lawyer or someone in the millitary who she said could support me. She told me i was no longer allowed to see my boyfriend for 1 1/2 years we saw eachother once a month at nigh when he would drive to my town to see me for normally less than 2 hours. this year in march after i turned 18 i ran away to myboyfriends house we live together both are going to school so we can supprort are future children. If you do not stay with this girl you both will regret it for the rest of your life. love is not supposed to be eassy it has it's consequences and rewards. The dissison is up to you but given the oppurtunity i wouldn't change mine for the world.
@rawar31 (112)
• Saint Vincent And The Grenadines
11 Aug 11
I you really love her and she really loves you for the true meaning of the word lover, you really do need to revisit this relationship. You only find one true love in this life, if your lucky enough to find it at all.If you believe in God or Jesus Christ you can pray that things work out as it should and the both of you be honest about it. Now unless your both relatives and your a muslim and shes a christian I dont see a whole lot of problems that love cant handle
@Olleenz (3398)
• Indonesia
11 Aug 11
First thing that I want you to know that I'm Christian and she's Muslim. In my country, these religions just like fire and water specially on marriage issue. We already discuss about this matter had solution for it (remember, I ready to sacrifice everything for her) for other problem that we must face, we both don't have any solution. That why we must break-up.
@enigma13 (372)
• Philippines
11 Aug 11
Maybe your love was true but it was just not strong enough to endure against the hindrances that came its way. Maybe it's just not meant to be. Maybe the two of you are not meant to be together. Maybe you are destined for another person who will make you happier and contented. The possibilities are endless. You just have to hope for the best.
@Olleenz (3398)
• Indonesia
11 Aug 11
Seem like you and I have same opinion about this. My real problem right now is how to forget her and move on. I have no solution for this and that why I tell to everyone that my true love ruin everything ..... hiks
@enigma13 (372)
• Philippines
11 Aug 11
I guess you can never really "forget" her. Although I am sure that when you meet "the one", you can finally move on.
• India
11 Aug 11
i do not believe in this ridiculous word "love". i want to say that nothing is love its only attraction between us.if this "attraction" gets more between them. "love" and "hate" means attractions and repulsions. if you love someone then you have ability to do everything. so my friend you know how to love but do not know how to complete the love. i m very sad for what is happen with you.
@Olleenz (3398)
• Indonesia
11 Aug 11
Well .... for me (at least) love is not just about take but also about give the best. If love just about take, take and take, it might hurts your partner and i don't want to do that. I already make all necessary action to take and break-up is my best solution to give her a chance to make better life (considering our unsolved problem).
@jazzyrae (1745)
• United States
11 Aug 11
I disagree love exists. Love is having someone there for you through the good and the bad. Love is someone who loves you no matter what and always has your back.