What will you do if you were him?

China
August 13, 2011 4:09am CST
I know one person in my previous company, he is from south of the China, I mean his hometown is very very far away from our place. He worked in our place and has been working here 5 years. He has gotten married, he has one child, and his parents, wife, child are all living in his hometown. He will give most of his salary to his family every month, but the problem is that he only goes back to see his family once a year, I asked him why not also take his family to our place or found a job in his home town, he didn't answer me, maybe he don't want to say. Indeed, earning money is important, but I think life is much more important, especially for the people who have gotten married. If you were him, what will you do? Will you find a job near his hometown and live with his family together?
1 person likes this
8 responses
@laydee (12798)
• Philippines
13 Aug 11
We have different reasons and sometimes people won't understand them but it doesn't mean that our decisions are wrong, they're just good for the moment - from the viewpoint of the person living that life. Perhaps it's more expensive to move the family. Perhaps there's no well-paying job near his hometown. Perhaps the family just don't want to move because they own the land. Perhaps the wife has sources of income there but it isn't enough. The most important thing here is that they're managing well. That he is confident and happy that he could give or provide for his family. I have friends who go out of the country to work. It's not because of ambition, but mostly for survival. There's just few opportunities where we are and a family couldn't really live through it's means here. Therefore, the fathers and mothers are forced to leave their families in order for the children to be able to live well and go to school It's a tough call because these kids usually don't see the value of their parents' sacrifice and when these parents do come home, they are mostly despised by the kids who were left behind. Is it all worth it? They always say yes. Have a great MyLot experience today!
1 person likes this
@jaiho2009 (39142)
• Philippines
13 Aug 11
Most husband and also wives here in our country are working in far places for the sake of their family and some or most of them only comes home once in every 2 years. This is one great sacrifice a husband/wife ever done for their family esp for their kids future and we can never blame them but admire their courage and strength leaving behind their loved ones. It's not easy for them...never easy for them but they endure the sadness and loneliness for the sake of earning money and giving their family a better life and future. have a great weekend jaiho®
1 person likes this
@williamjisir (22819)
• China
13 Aug 11
I think that it is because he likes his current working place and he is happy to have his wife stay in his hometown with her child. He must be content with his current life and work or his child is still too young. If they are both here, then he will get distracted from his work that is already hard for him. But if his wife stays in his hometown while the child is still so young, she can have her own parents offer her a hand. Or maybe the salary he could get from the company is good that he doesn't want to give it up and move back to the south. Any reason is possible. If I were him, I would do the same as I wish to even though I could go back to my hometown once a year. Career is more important to some people compared with family life. Of course, it would be much better if we could make both ends meet. Thank you for the discussion.
@fannitia (2167)
• Bulgaria
13 Aug 11
We don't know exactly the reasons but I think this is clear - they are economical ones. In my country too people who live in villages or small towns where they can't find work, go to work abroad. Many of them prefer to make this sacrifice - they go alone, they work hard, they try to live with little money and they send most of it to their family. Sometimes they decide to move with the whole family but this is a huge risk. I cannot say what would I do if I was him. But I admire him for his courage and sacrifice.
@pahak627 (4558)
• Philippines
13 Aug 11
Well, if I were him, what I will do would depend upon the situation that we are in. I guess he has reasons for this. Most of us want to be near our family but for some reason maybe we will also do what that person did.
• China
18 Aug 11
If I were him,I am sure I will live with my family. I can't imagine if I see my family once a year. It's too terrible. Living alone is poor. He must have his own difficulties.
@iamsummer (192)
13 Aug 11
If i i were he,i would find a job near my hometown.I don't wanna work far away from my families.As for you colleague,i don't know why he don't tell you why he don't take his family to your place,maybe he has his agony.But nobody knows it.
@keihimekawa (2009)
• Philippines
13 Aug 11
If I were in his shoes of course I would like to bring my family to where I work. That way I can be closer with them. Or I can find another job where I afford to travel back home frequently to be with them. But then, I'm not your ex-officemate :D Maybe he has his own reasons on why he decided not to move or find another job and maybe that reason is quite confidential so he decided not to reveal it to anybody :D