Can you say I forgive you?

Very wise words, knittingpro. You've echoed a lot of how I feel. I became civil with my ex... my daughters' father... after a rotten divorce (is there ever really a good one, though?) I got tired of living in fear of what he might try to do to bring me down. I decided to use my best coping skills to develop some kind of relationship that allows me to keep in contact with him regarding what they are doing in school and such... but I don't get emotionally invested. I think you are right that some just don't have the ability to be a good person. I've been in relationship with a narcissist... and that's not something anyone would want to do willingly, believe me. He treated me in ways that no woman should ever be treated and, at this time, there is no forgiveness for it. I think, in time, I may learn to forgive but, as I said earlier, I won't ever forget. Some things just leave an emotional mark on a person that can never be erased.

We come to a point in life where we have to forgive for ourselves. For better mental health and inner peace. I've trusted people and have betrayed people but that part is in the past. If someone hurts me I try to understand why. For the most part it's not intentional. But discussing it straight away can mend any hurt and you move on. I've been working on all relationships I've had and I'm making peace with them. It's not to have friendships it to resolve it and move on. To express an apology and try to make it right. That's all we can do in life is to try and do better.