Tantrums

By C
@ShyBear88 (18113)
United States
December 6, 2011 3:00pm CST
How do you deal with a child having a tramrum? Do you just let them cry it out, do you calm then down and talk to them about it, or do you give in to what that child wants to stop them from crying? For me it depends on that child's age normally younger then 2 ibjust let them cry it out and calm themselves done. Other wise o talk to then calmly about what ever reason why they are throwin a tantrum.
1 person likes this
5 responses
@Neriz69 (1042)
• Philippines
7 Dec 11
From my experience, it is hard and is no use talking to a child having tantrums. You don't ignore them either because they would just cry louder and harder. What I do is to sit beside them while they are having tantrums making sure that they feel that somebody is there to listen to them. After a few minutes they would normally calm down, then that is the time you ask them what is troubling them. It also needs a lot of patience waiting out for their tantrums to subside.
@ShyBear88 (18113)
• United States
7 Dec 11
I let them cry because they need to learn to clam themselves down before I can listen to them. I won't sit next to them because I'm not going to get hi and most kids want to be left alone for a few minutes when thy are up set. You can talk to a child that is upset and tell them nicely when you calm a little bit more down and stop crying I can listen to you and talk with you. But a 2 to 4 year old dont understand that. We do bug in the rug with my nephew where he throws a tantrum we tickle him with out feet. That normally stops him but each child is differen I always want to be left alone when upset. Even though my daughter is 10 months old there are time we me and my husband have to let her cry and she calms her self down. When hurt she ants cuddles. She throws Minnie tantrums where she just sits and cries and when she is ready shell come to you.
• Philippines
7 Dec 11
Hi there. I totally agree. The response you give to a child will vary depending on the situation and the child's age. I don't have kids yet but I have a lot of nephews and nieces who grew up with me. Their parents usually shout at them, but if I say or tell them to keep quiet, they'll follow. It's how you talk with them and they were raised for them to respond obediently too.
@ShyBear88 (18113)
• United States
7 Dec 11
Ye that is correct how you talk to your kids or kids around you gets different responses. The more gental but firm they normally will listen to you.
@Triple0 (1907)
• Australia
7 Dec 11
Your discussion reminded me of this one episode I watched on Dr Phil. He was talking about the same exact thing and he passed out a poll for the audience to do. Most people chose not to get the toy the child wants and let them calm down after their tantrum. There was also an example of one family who had a total brat. he threw tantrums all the time and he was not a happy child. A happy child is a healthy child and a kid chucking tantrums almost every minute is not the way to go. The parents had no idea how to control their child so the Mum reverted to screaming at her child and dragging him away from the item he wants. The father would take a calm approach but the Mum would tell him off why he's being to easy on their son. Dr Phil addressed this complication and his idea was to allow the child to long for something. Promises do work and by allowing them to long for something, they tend to be more behaved and maybe, eventually they'll forget about it but screaming at your child is a big no no. Empathize with your child and tell them that you understand because a child just wants to be heard.
@ShyBear88 (18113)
• United States
7 Dec 11
All kids throw tea turns and dr Phil I don't like. He isn't even a real doctor. A kid that throws one doesn't mean they are unhappy. Children don't know who to express there feelings so it comes out in a form of a tantrum some times. Over finery understand those feelings. My nephew throws then a lot. He is 4 and autistic so some times whe he gets the no answer he just flips out and throws a tantrum distract him for he most part when he throws on so he forgets what was said to him.
@deebomb (15322)
• United States
6 Dec 11
Hello Shy. I have a red headed daughter and when she was about two and a half she found the tantrums. There was no ignoring them either. They were loud and she threw herself on the floor kicking too. There was no calming her down either. for some reason I remembered something my aunt told me she did to her son when he threw one too many tantrums. It was back in the day before every house had kitchen sinks. She had just finished doing dishes and was throwing the dish water out in the yard when he started his tantrum. She with out really thinking turned and threw the water on him. He was so surprised that he stopped in mid tantrum. He was so shocked he never had another one. She was just as shocked as he was. I had an almost empty glass of tea that I had been drinking so I just took it and tossed it on her. She was so surprised she stopped. She was more stubborn and started to have a few more but after a second glass all I had to do was look at the glass and she stopped right away. About the fourth time tantrums were a thing of the past. It might seem mean but it worked better than any time out or any thing else.
@ShyBear88 (18113)
• United States
7 Dec 11
We do the bug in the rug. When my nephew would throw a tramrum we would walk up to him and say "oh there is a bug in te rug and I'm going to get him". Who ever was around would tickle him with there feet like they where going to stomp a bug. He would atop cryin because it was funny. Then we would tell he can't do this or can't go there or can't have this right now.
@EavesJ (95)
• United States
6 Dec 11
As a parent of three boys I would have to say that they always need or want something. It is my job to find out what they need and not exactly what they want. It could be that the reason they are crying is because they have a an illness with high fever, or a bad rash that is aggrovating them. If its an "I want that", what ever it maybe, they can't always get what they want. What I do is tell them if they can have it or not. And if they don't like it there is a corner they can stand in until they want to stop crying. And I tell them that to.
@ShyBear88 (18113)
• United States
7 Dec 11
There is a difference between crying and then a trantrumniabwhen they are laying on the floor kicking, screaming and cryin all at one time. Crying because you did get something or is stick is not a tantrum.