When a woman is successful in her carrier: Is it a bless or a curse?

@MissPiggy (1751)
Indonesia
February 15, 2012 12:21pm CST
Well, this is just what I feel. It's undeniable that there are many women who achieve great success in their lives. They earn money on their own, they build images, and somehow become independent. However, as life is in balance, a success may come up with disaster. In my age now, people around me would think that I'm already successful. I have a good job, I have a good position, I earn enough for me, and blah blah blah. The bottom line, I can make some people get jealous of what achieve in my life now. But, on the other hand, my love life is always a disaster. I have some guy friends, even I can easily make friends with guys. But it seems like I'm not interesting enough to be more than friends. :( Some of my friends say that I don't want to open my heart and get really serious with one of them. Well, I did. Still it didn't work. Even I got hurt. Now I'm still not ready in any kind of relationship. I'm enjoying myself being single. But my mom is afraid if I get too comfortable being single while I'm not. I'm worried too. :( And this is not just me. I have some single friends who have the same experiences as mine. And for those who got married, they have some difficulties in keeping their lives in balance. In "The Devil Wears Prada" Nigel told Andy that if her life goes up in smoke, maybe it's time for a promotion. Somehow I feel it's true. My career is rising while my love life is drowning. :( Sometimes I question myself: Is there really a soul-mate for me somewhere? When will I meet him?! :(
3 people like this
10 responses
@shylade (3137)
• Philippines
16 Feb 12
i am a working mother and wife. i'm holding a good position in our company right now and at the same time doing my responsibility as a wife and mother. its a multitasking work, doing all at the same time. i think being a career woman does not prevent me from having a good family because i got all the support from my husband and because i am very inspired to work hard for our son. by the way, my husband is working too, and like him i am very supportive of him. yes it is really hard to balance everything but if you truly want to do it, you can do it. but at this point in my life, my family is my first priority that is why i'm planning to stay at home to take care of my son and our future children. i wonder if other mothers feel the same way too. for you MissPiggy, don't lose hope because in God's time you will have a family of your own. you will find a man you will support you all the way and is very brave to stand with you without any insecurity. good luck and God bless.
@sishy7 (27640)
• Australia
16 Feb 12
Being able to balance a career and family is certainly a remarkable achievement. Having to choose one over the other, is not an easy decision either. Just having a career, or just having a family, can still be a rewarding life if one makes the most of it.
@MissPiggy (1751)
• Indonesia
16 Feb 12
@Shylade: It's really amazing to know that you could manage to make it in balance between work and family. I have some friends who do the same. But somehow I always manage to find the flaws in their life. :( And finally you have to make a choice too, right? Right now, I'm enjoying everything I achieve, but I'm ready to let everything go to take care of my family someday. And thank you for your wish, I really say Amen to that. Now, I guess I'll just wait for that day to come. :) @Sishy7: Yes, to me, a woman who can manage to keep work and family in balance is a very amazing woman. But if she is willing to let go the carrier and choose the family, she's even more amazing. And Shylade there, is a very very amazing woman in my book. :D Thank you for both of you. :*
@shylade (3137)
• Philippines
18 Feb 12
@MissPiggy: when you have a family the work "me", "myself" is not going to be that important to you. all you will think and say is my husband, my baby... i am willing to give up everything for my family, especially for my little son. some will never understand the feeling unless you have experienced it. the best job every woman can have is to be a mother and it is the best right we have. thanks for your kind comments.
• India
16 Feb 12
i guess, you just need to wait for the right person. think of all successful women in the world and see for yourself if it was a curse for them to be successful or was it a blessing....
@MissPiggy (1751)
• Indonesia
16 Feb 12
But what if I see both? :( I have some successful friends and I can see the flaws in either their carrier or in their family. :(
• India
18 Feb 12
Hello MissPiggy, exceptions are always there in all spheres of life. I bet you just need to give yourself sometime and wait for the right person.....
@MissPiggy (1751)
• Indonesia
18 Feb 12
I agree with you. And yes, I'm enjoying myself right now. I keep on pray to God and just wait for Him to do His job. :)
• Mexico
18 Feb 12
Hi Miss Piggy: It shouldn't be a curse. I know some guys feel intimidated when they try to start a relationship with a talented woman just as you are but there are guys like me who actually feel even more interested when we know a woman with ambition and talent because we could have a really good conversation and we are tired of trying to date a silly girl. I think there are chances around you. Maybe you are just looking in the wrong place. Good luck. ALVARO
@MissPiggy (1751)
• Indonesia
19 Feb 12
Hi, Alvaro. I just wish that the guys I meet so far have the same thoughts as yours. Somehow I can be very sweet and lovable to a guy, but when they starts saying or doing silly things, I can't help myself to become sarcastic. :( My boss (he's a man who really enjoys having a conversation and jokes with me, but unfortunately, he's married, lol) says that what scares the guys. I can be a good listener, as long as it's a logical conversation. But if I can learn how to be more patient, I can attract guys. But that's what he says. I don't know for sure. Lol.
@Ernnesto (180)
• Slovak Republic
16 Feb 12
I do not see any problem with being successfull like a women. Maybe some men have a problem with that still, but for me it is a forgot thing. There is no problem with that. But when you come to normal life, I think those some men who have a problem with that have a problem also with mantaining a relationship with a women who is more successful than he is. I saw many examples of broken relationships because of that. Some poeple simply dont like if their partner is nore succsessfull then they are. There is still some kind of challange. And do not worry about love of your life. When there will be a right time for you, it comes. There is no need to push it, it comes by itself.
@MissPiggy (1751)
• Indonesia
17 Feb 12
First, you're right, I have stopped trying to be in a relationship. Now I prefer to be relaxed. :) And yes again, just like you, I have seen some relationships collapsed because one of the couple refuse to understand each other. That's why I am worried that I won't find a man who is brave enough to propose and marry me. :) But I'm waiting for God to do His job now. I won't rush Him although I'll keep on praying. ;)
• Philippines
16 Feb 12
When a woman is successful with her carrer, then she is so blessed,and thankful to God that she able to commit positively.Struggle and perseverance is a must to obtain such success in life...
@MissPiggy (1751)
• Indonesia
16 Feb 12
Believe me, I'm grateful to God for what I have achieved now. However, I'm also waiting for another blessing from Him: my soul mate. :)
@Lakota12 (42684)
• United States
16 Feb 12
you just havent met the rightperson yet!
@MissPiggy (1751)
• Indonesia
16 Feb 12
You're right... :(
@r3jcorp (1384)
• Philippines
16 Feb 12
I guess it is the prize you pay for any success... and you can not get it all. Or many it is not just the right time... The fact that it is a blessing financially, there would be someone who will suffer from the hectic schedule that would surely be asked for any sucessful person.
@MissPiggy (1751)
• Indonesia
16 Feb 12
Yes, but I'm ready to let go off my carrier once I meet my soul mate. :)
@sishy7 (27640)
• Australia
16 Feb 12
Your topic reminded me of Adele. You've heard of her perhaps, a great singer who just swept 6 Grammy Awards. She is now going to put her career "on hold" to concentrate on her relationship. Well, that's her choice and it does not mean her career is a curse. When it's time, the right guy will come; in the mean time, just enjoy and make the most of your career.
@MissPiggy (1751)
• Indonesia
16 Feb 12
Well, I think I would also do the same if I have this someone to focus on. :( I'm enjoying what I have now, but I really hope I'd find someone soon.
1 person likes this
@cassije74 (247)
• Philippines
16 Feb 12
Hi misspiggy! All i can say to you is that, everybody is has its own way of calling whether we like it or not. Some are called for marriage, others are for singleness, and so the rest. Just that we learn to accept and consider it as a blessing and not a curse. Never force yourself searching for Mr. right guy because you will just end up in frustration.Let time draws you both closer and nearer to each other as i believe the two of you is already plan according to God's eyes. A successful woman like you really had a hard time looking for a husband you know what? because of your status in life. 1. Are you willing to turn down your career if that guy happens to ask it for you? 2. Are you an idealistic person or rather a perfectionist one? 3. Is the current status of a guy important to you? or i should say, your salary is more higher compared to that guy, his family background . 4. In your position right now, you had the right to " be my way" with authority 5. The guy is hesitant to propose you because of insecurities especially comparing their achievements to you. You know men's ego. And by nature men should dominate the women. 6. Are you willing to be corrected and accept the guy as he is inspite of your standard right now? Lastly, your choice will always depend on you. If you gonna find a husband, and build a home the willingness of yourself really matters. I believe, nobody is considered perfect unless we keep on practicing and got the best out of it. We live in a world that is full of challenges and competition. We should learn how to run the race and finish the line...
@MissPiggy (1751)
• Indonesia
16 Feb 12
Omg, Cassije74, who are you really? :D It really is amazing reading your respond and I am really grateful to you for responding. This is exactly what I need, but I already know some of the answers to those questions even when I'm still in high school. :) 1. Yes. I am willing to let go off my carrier to stay with the family. I even hope that guy would ask me to quit working to take care of him and our family. 2. Well, to be honest I don't know the answer to this question. Some of my friends said that I'm an idealistic person. I prefer to really think with my head than with my heart. And although I sometimes break some rules, but I prefer to stay in it most of the time. If this perfection means to the character, then I'd say that no body's perfect. But there's nothing wrong to keep learning how to be a better person, right? 3. I don't care. If this guy has the guts to propose me to marry him, then it means he already has a plan for both of us. It also means that he believes in himself and in me. 4. Correct, that's why I need a man who can "control" me. Well, I have t admit that I need a man who's smarter and more strict than me. :( But he also has to be very patient. :D 5. Don't worry, I've been educated well that a woman should be "under" man. I know their ego. But somehow, men also need to listen to us women as well. And I'd appreciate this kinda guy more. 6. Depends on the situation. If this guy can logically convince me if I'm wrong, then I'd listen. That's why I said I need someone smarter. At first yes, I forced myself to search for this Mr. Right as I have been in relationship. But now, I think I'm going to pray and let God takes care of the rest. You're right in this: My choice will always depends on me. :)
@deodavid (4150)
• Philippines
16 Feb 12
Hi there miss piggy, I know that one day your guy will come and sweep you off of your feet someone who can handle a successful woman and is very spontaneous and build things with his bear hands someone that will show you that even though you are successful and very independent you will depend on his heart to care for you and love you you'll just have to wait pounce on him when you see him.
@MissPiggy (1751)
• Indonesia
16 Feb 12
Awwww...that's really sweet deodavid! I'll sure wait for that day to come! Just please pray for me. :)