To all lovers out there: What do you think of this thought?

@inkyuboz (1288)
Mandaluyong City, Philippines
July 26, 2012 10:46am CST
This line came from the movie, 500 Days of Summer: "People change. Feelings change. It doesn't mean that the love once shared wasn't true and real. It simply just means that sometimes when people grow, they grow apart." Despite the heart wrenching feeling you get while reading it, the statement is quite true isn't it? It's inevitable and somehow, I feel that a lot of people will still feel that the statement is invalid. I wanna discuss this with an open mind.
1 person likes this
12 responses
@ankit_620 (496)
• India
27 Jul 12
No i don't have anything to say against this statement.I can't even if i want to because it is just so true.i can say that because i have experienced it myself. For once when two people are together in love and then when they break apart then they start doubting the time they spent together and the things they said to each other if it were true or not. Of course it was all true everything that was said and done but what people need to learn is that the things which happened in the past were true at that moment it was in that moment which was honesty.If they try to compare past said things with the present circumstances and claiming each other liar is not the way to go and that is what this statement tells us, teaches us
@Paper_Doll (2376)
• Philippines
27 Jul 12
I like that line and it maybe sad but it is true to many relationships. I promised my husband when we got married that there will be no night that I will not be in his side and that wherever he is, I am there. I am not doing that just for me, it is for our marriage. He sometimes think that I am exaggerating but later on, he was able to see things through. We are on the stage where we are starting to build the foundation of our marriage and being together will help the bond stronger. What the line says is almost like what Kim Sam Soon said in this drama series. It is during the scene where she was talking to the previous girlfriend of the guy he is currently with. She told the previous girlfriend that you cannot just hold onto memories because people change and so their feelings.
• United States
27 Jul 12
You're right about it being a heart wrenching statement. How horrible must it be to fall OUT of love after really being IN love with that person!? I've never experience that, but I know it'd be terrible! And yes, you're right about it being true too! I'm sure this happens all the time. People change, and while the people may still "love" each other, it's not the same love they started with, and it's not the love of a marriage. It's the love of familiarity and friends, but not mates.
@doroffee (4230)
• Hungary
27 Jul 12
I do agree with this. People don't feel crushes on other people and date for x time if they don't feel anything. It is TRUE love, also, maybe not THE love of their lives, because they are a mismatch from the first moment or people and their interests change. I think those people who say after a break-up that their love wasn't real just say it for 2 potential reasons: -the break-up wasn't a nice one (they argued, they were vheated on), and by saying this, it's easier for the heart to heal -just because they don't feel any love anymore for their ex, they think that then it was not love... but if they thought back then it was love, then it was.
1 person likes this
@LittleMel (14055)
• Canada
26 Jul 12
I somewhat agree with the statement I used to say that myself. People change. Feelings change. They grow apart. But it's also true that sometimes this doesn't mean the love is not real, and sometimes because it isn't love to begin with, so it's not strong enough to last they just think they love, but they really don't Still, change will always happen, no matter how much we believe something or someone will not change I usually just go with this understanding and move on, whether there is closure from the other person or not, I'm closing that chapter in my life
1 person likes this
@jeawings (27)
• United States
26 Jul 12
Relationships all have their ups and downs. Sometimes the downs last longer than the ups and vice-versa. I've never been married, so I can't speak for married couples, but as far as my fiance goes, I can definitely speak for engaged and dating couples. My fiance and I are currently undergoing a rough patch in our relationship. That doesn't mean either of us are bad people, but we both understand that it's just one of those down times, and if we can't get through this down time, then we will never be good enough for the next up time that's waiting for us. Although right now we are not happy, this is a time where we can take a step back, relearn each other and rethink things through. We are also experimenting in new ways with our actions and attitudes in order to hopefully hit a new gold mine along the way. I don't really think people can grow apart. I believe when people go from married to divorced, it usually has to do with a pride issue. Someone doesn't want to suck up their pride, and instead of remembering that marriage changes "I" to "US" stubborn selfishness exists and gets in the way of the relationship. Relationships take sacrifices. That doesn't mean to sacrifice your relationship, but get rid of something that causes your relationship to be on the rocks. Besides, who is more important? Your significant other or some inanimate object, addiction, etc. that takes over your mind?
26 Jul 12
It is a bummer that it is a valid statement. It does not have to be all bad I mean it is subjective. For example, high school sweethearts and the girl has the urge to be something great , to do something extraordinary in her life yet her male companion is a homebody and does not feel much urgency to change the world. She will perhaps succeed by following her heart and look back at things to understand that it was painful but she grew out of it. I am a believer in when things or people are no longer in our lives, there will be something/someone greater coming our way. It may never be able to replace the hole that the previous one has left us with but the sting of the memory wont hurt as much, and if you are lucky, you won't have time to remember it at all! Another line from that movie is that "A guy and a girl can be just friends, but at one point or another they will fall for each other.Maybe temporarily,maybe at the wrong time,maybe too late,maybe forever." It is truly a fantastic movie , brutally honest and you can relate to each character plus you cant help but to root for Tom!
1 person likes this
@factorial (982)
• Philippines
26 Jul 12
My first gf and I were lovers for ten years... On the tenth year I just felt it is gone... gone and nowhere (no-where; not now-here).
1 person likes this
• Philippines
18 Nov 12
As they say, Change is the only permanent thing in this world. That is why, to keep the relationship working, both parties should work for it. Keep the passion alive. And you have to exert effort not to be tempted to cheat nor to fall out of love. Because if not, the two of you could really grow apart.
@bestboy19 (5482)
• United States
28 Jul 12
I would think if you were truly in love with someone, your feelings for that person would grow, not change.
@dorannmwin (36698)
• United States
28 Jul 12
You know, in the eight years that my husband and I have been married, I have seen that both of us have changed, but I don't believe that it has had any kind of a negative impact on our marriage. In fact, I actually think that quite the opposite is true in this kind of a situation. We have changed and our feelings have changed, but I tend to think that those feelings and such have made us a lot closer than we were when we originally said our vows back then.
@lelin1123 (15645)
• Puerto Rico
27 Jul 12
This is a very valid statement. Many people grow apart after years of being together. Then again alot don't. Remember back in the day people married and lived a shorter life. Now for a good number of decades people are living much longer and its sometimes very hard to live with the same person day after day year after year because people change. They change in their thoughts, attractions, how they eat, sleep etc.... That is why when others find out that people have been married for 40 or more years to the same person they are surprised. It takes alot to deal with the same person everyday even if you are still in love with them.