What for you make a conversation?

@dpk262006 (56098)
Delhi, India
January 26, 2013 8:09am CST
Hi all! What does a conversation mean to you? Do you start a conversation and just listen to the other person whom you are talking to or you start a conversation and just keep talking about yourself and your experiences, whether the other fellow is finding it interesting or not. Do you balance your conversation in the manner that you share some of your experiences/happenings and then listen to the other fellow what s/he has to say? Do you node in between the conversation to make the other person realise that you are listening to him/her. Do you ask small questions to make the conversation more interesting? Too many questions from me ..........lol! Now it is your take to get into conversation with me. Please share your thoughts. Thanks in advance.
2 people like this
15 responses
@Aja103654 (5658)
• Philippines
26 Jan 13
I think a conversation is when all the people involved get to take turns in listening and speaking their mind. My conversations are usually like this with people who are close to me. When it's a stranger it's harder for me to talk to that person at first, but when I start to get comfortable, it becomes a two-way communication. One way communications all the time can be a drag, that is unless if the listener is interested in the topic and that the other person is expected to share a long story. I use the words, 'okay' 'aha' and nod when people talk then ask follow-up questions to learn more information. then insert something I want to say then go back to listening.
1 person likes this
@dpk262006 (56098)
• Delhi, India
27 Jan 13
HI Aja! Yes, you are very right when all people involved get a chance to tell their side of story. It should not happen that there is only one speaker and others are listening. It is correct that when we talk to known to people/friends we feel more comfortable and at ease rather than talking to complete strangers. It is nice on your part that you keep using the words Okay, aha and keep noding to make the other person realize that you are paying attention to him. I understand that you know how to 'converse' effectively and for people who come into contact with you always enjoy talking to you. Thanks for sharing.
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@Aja103654 (5658)
• Philippines
28 Jan 13
Thank you, deepak. I may seem that way online. Online I have much more freedom to express my thoughts in words. But in speaking, I don't often open my mouth. Maybe I'm lazy or I have nothing to say. Sometimes I just enjoy listening to a person so I can learn many new things. But people who have the same interest as I do, enjoy talking to me. This applies to everyone too.
@dpk262006 (56098)
• Delhi, India
28 Jan 13
Yes, you are right it is more convenient for us to express on line. Here we could think and gather our thoughts and then we could write and need be, we could edit. If you speak less and listen more in real life, that is OK. You know now a days you will find that everyone wants to 'speak' no one wants to 'listen'. Hence, there is shortage of listeners and if you proved to be a good listener, your friends will come to you only.
@Nursefrai06 (2498)
• Penrith, Australia
27 Jan 13
If they have something to say, I try my best to listen to them and respect them, so that when I talk they do the same thing. Although, sometimes, listening can be really really hard especially if you're not interested about the topic they want to talk about and you can't wait for them to finish so that you can share your even more interesting story. Other times I can't wait and I use butt in with a topic I like to change the conversation into something else. But if it is serious matter, then that's a different story, I will listen to the person if he/she is sad because that's what they need
1 person likes this
@dpk262006 (56098)
• Delhi, India
28 Jan 13
HI Nurse! Welcome to mylot and my discussion. I agree with you that when someone is telling his side of story and stretching is beyond limits, then it gets difficult to listen continuously to that person. It is wiser on your part to change the topic, when you see that the other speaker is going off tangent. Nice to meet you and thanks for responding.
1 person likes this
• Penrith, Australia
2 Feb 13
Nice to meet you dpk. Is that deepak cause I can't help but think of it that way, it's cool though. I wish I foud listen to people like really really listen. I admire people who can though, I think it requirs a special skill to do that.
@dpk262006 (56098)
• Delhi, India
13 Feb 13
You would learn it gradually. All the best.
@MyLeeian (18)
• Saudi Arabia
27 Jan 13
I'm a type of person that talk too much. But everything that comes out in my mouth, I know it has a sense. No matter how small or big the topic is, I'm there, just to give an opinion, suggestion, violent reaction and etc. Sounds crazy right. It's hard to live in a place where in there are no any person whom you can share your thoughts and express your emotions with. Listening and making a conversation is a part of good communication that leads toward to a harmonious relationship.
1 person likes this
@dpk262006 (56098)
• Delhi, India
28 Jan 13
Hi MYL! Welcome to mylot. Do you feel happy and contending when you take the command and you keep talking, means you are the only speaker and others listen to you.. There is nothing wrong in giving opinions and suggestions etc. but we should not give unsolicited opinions. Thanks for sharing.
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@bluespygirl (2112)
• Philippines
27 Jan 13
When I am in a training, seminar or place that I know no one, i try to be friendly by smiling first and I try to open a communication. I would tell something to start a tlk. I don't want it that I am with someone and yet, I can't talk to them. Ofcourse I balance the situation and see if the persons wants to talk too. I nod or smile when a person talks to me and I tell what is on my mind.
@dpk262006 (56098)
• Delhi, India
27 Jan 13
Hi blue! You appear to me a wiser and practical person. It is nice on your part that when you are in a Seminar etc. you just smile and try to start conversation with others. It is good that you know how to balance the conversation. I understand your nature is appreciated by others. Thanks for sharing.
@neelia27 (896)
• Philippines
27 Jan 13
If the person i am with is somewhat a silent type then I will make some conversation and if I am with a talkative person then I just listen its basically depends on what type of person you are with.. but sometimes I am a much more a listener than making conversation.. but if my opinion then I will talk..
1 person likes this
@dpk262006 (56098)
• Delhi, India
27 Jan 13
HI Neelia! Welcome to mylot and my discussion. How do you determine that the person whom you are going to talk is of 'silent' type? It is good on your part that when the other person is speaking you need to listen to him attentively so as to make him realize that you are good listener. Thanks for sharing.
@jenny1015 (13391)
• Philippines
27 Jan 13
Conversation is a two-way street- when one speaks, the other one listens and they take turn in doing both. Hand gestures, nod and facial expressions are all present during such situation.
1 person likes this
@dpk262006 (56098)
• Delhi, India
27 Jan 13
Hi jen! Yes, it is so true that conversation is two way street and both the persons involved should understand this point. What you do while conversing, do you give ample indication through your gestures that you are listening to the other party. Do you ask small questions in between? Thanks for sharing.
1 person likes this
@dandan07 (1908)
• China
27 Jan 13
When I meet problems in life, while can not make out my own decision, I will start a discussion here to get suggestions. People with different backgrounds or different life experiences will have different ways to solve the same problems. So I can have a lot of solutions and find out the suitable one for me. I like this way to find help.
1 person likes this
@dpk262006 (56098)
• Delhi, India
27 Jan 13
Oh dear dandan we were talking about conversation in real life not when you feel like starting a discussion here. It is always good to start a post if you need some good suggestions because mylot is the right place to get some practical suggestions and advice. Thanks for joining.
1 person likes this
@Porcospino (16428)
• Denmark
26 Jan 13
I think that I talk too much sometimes On the other hand I also love to listen to learn more about the topics that other people talk about and I think that the best conversations are conversations where we both talk and both listen. I think that every person has an interesting story to tell if you are willing to listen and I like to ask questions about the things that people tell me in order to show my interest and in order to learn more. If we are both interested in same topics it is fun to share experiences and learn from eachother. If the person that I talk is interested in something that I don't know anything about it is interesting to ask questions about that topic and learn something new.
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@dpk262006 (56098)
• Delhi, India
27 Jan 13
Hi Por! Nice to see you here. It does not matter if you talk too much, I hope you find good listener for your narration. Yes, the best conversation are when there is a balance and both listen as well as speak, turn by turn. I feel asking small questions is part of conversation and without it a conversation can not complete. When we listen to something new we get to learn a lot, therefore, we need to listen carefully what others have to say. Thanks for sharing and joining us.
1 person likes this
@jaiho2009 (39021)
• Philippines
26 Jan 13
A good conversation is when you feel the other person is interested with the subject or not. I won't pursue a conversation if I feel that the one I am talking with finds it dull and we should know how to feel the difference. I am considerate when it comes to communicating/conversing -but I am also sensitive enough to feel if the other person find the conversation exciting or boring. Have a great weekend dear
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@dpk262006 (56098)
• Delhi, India
27 Jan 13
Hi Jai! Yes, it is true that when we are talking the other one should have his ears towards us, if he is lost somewhere else and giving us a blank looks than it is no use prolonging the conversation. I understand that you give ample opportunity to others to say their side of story and you give them a patient hearing. Have a great weekend to you too and thanks for sharing.
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@vandana7 (61043)
• India
26 Jan 13
I am talking too much nowadays...there is enough of people to talks...I should change the route may be. :)
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@dpk262006 (56098)
• Delhi, India
27 Jan 13
Vandana - You are free to talk as much as you like and you always start discussions on fiery and debatable topics, which shows that you are a wonderful orator and could speak on any issue with ease. Thanks for joining.
1 person likes this
@WakeUpKitty (8707)
• Netherlands
26 Jan 13
I seldom start a conversation. And if it's about something that keeps my mind busy.. if others start talking in between I stop talking. I only ask questions if there is something to question about. Most conversations are started because someone needs to get something of his/her chest. So you let them talk first.
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@dpk262006 (56098)
• Delhi, India
27 Jan 13
Hi there ! It means you are a patient listener and you allow other fellow to speak. It is true that someone starts the concersation when he wants to share something or need some kind of advice. Thanks for sharing.
1 person likes this
• Indonesia
26 Jan 13
well it's depend to who i make a conversation, if i make conversation with person i just met. i will let him talk first and then i will speak to him only if necessary. but if i make conversation for job, i will start first but also with necessary sentences it's all depends to the situation and condition.
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@dpk262006 (56098)
• Delhi, India
27 Jan 13
Hi there! It is nice on your part that if you are talking to an unknown person, you allow him to speak, give him an opportunity to open up. Naturally, when you are called for a job, your prospective employer would surely like to know about you and then you will have to speak more and answer more. Thanks for kick starting the post.
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@pergammano (7755)
• Canada
27 Jan 13
Dear dpk...A lesson from my dearly departed Father, has stood me well in life; "God gave you ONE mouth and TWO ears!" In other words, LISTEN more than you speak. Throughout my life, this has helped me in debates and conversations..and "LOL" saving me from eating a lot of my words! I love great exchanges of ideas..there is always a lot to learn!
@dpk262006 (56098)
• Delhi, India
27 Jan 13
Hi dear! Yes, it is so true that we have two ears and one mouth so that we could listen more and speak less. Listening to others enlighten us and we need to be patient when we are talking to others. We need them to give space to speak. Thanks for sharing.
1 person likes this
@bluespygirl (2112)
• Philippines
9 Mar 13
It differs on where I am and the people around me. I start a conversation when I feel that the persons in my surrounding are kind and willing to talk back. I balance things that I have to say and I always participate when someone is talking. I hate silence especially in crowds so I try to make a conversation and be friendly to others
@neelia27 (896)
• Philippines
27 Jan 13
If the person i am with is somewhat a silent type then I will make some conversation and if I am with a talkative person then I just listen its basically depends on what type of person you are with.. but sometimes I am a much more a listener than making conversation.. but if my opinion is needed then I will talk..