white lies... do you feel guilty afterwards?

@dagami (1162)
Rome, Italy
April 18, 2013 3:20am CST
there's going to be a 24 hr transport strike tomorrow. as per the rules, there are two guaranteed breaks - one the morning and the other in the early evening. this is done in order that the working population will be able to go to work and go back home safely. i have a regular 3pm-8pm job so i will have a problem in going to work. although we have a van, i don't want to take this to work as it's so hard to look for a parking space near the place. besides, because of this strike, there will be traffic jams all over the city. in the mornings, i have an arrangement with my landlord. i drive his daughter to school using their car and he deducts the pay on my rent. due to this transport strike tomorrow, i told him a white lie. since he knows that i am looking for another afternoon job, i told him that tomorrow morning i will have an interview with a prospective employer so i cannot take his daughter to school. i did this because i want to catch the last bus in the morning since i've already talked with my afternoon employer that i'll be coming in the morning because of the strike. but i feel GUILTY...
1 person likes this
12 responses
@grvdubey11 (1882)
• India
18 Apr 13
I would call it a practical decision,just my opinion though.It would have been wrong if you were doing this on a regular basis.But since you had very less options ,you had to take such decision.The thing is we cannot please everyone all the time,all we can do is ,make sure that our actions do least damage to people.We have to make adjustments like this.In my earlier days of sailing, like 6-7 years ago i asked my senior that i want to wish my father as it was his birthday, he gave me time during working house to do that.Then couple of years ago i asked another senior for the same favor on this other ship i was sailing but he just refused ,so i told a lie to him that i had to return checklist to the Captain and he allowed me.I found doing that fair because i did lot of work in my off duty hours too, why taking 5 mins for a genuine reason is wrong.I found it fair so i lied. However if you are feeling guilty ,do something extra for Landlord and his daughter someday, that would make it even.Best wishes.
2 people like this
@dagami (1162)
• Rome, Italy
18 Apr 13
sometimes it is funny that white lies are often accepted better than truths. i just hope i won't get caught! they are a nice family and i don't want them to think bad of me.
1 person likes this
@Pegasus72 (1901)
27 Apr 13
Sometimes but most of the time it is like saying No I don't know anything about the party, when I do know there is a party because it is suppose to be a surprise more then outright lying.
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@dagami (1162)
• Rome, Italy
28 Apr 13
i wouldn't feel guilty if i'd tell this lie in this situation you mentioned. if i tell the truth, it would remove the element of surprise and those who are organizing the surprise party would get mad at me.
@Pegasus72 (1901)
28 Apr 13
Exactly. Don't get me wrong I have lied in my lifetime, but as an adult I try not to lie. It just isn't worth the time it takes.
@bird123 (10518)
• United States
21 Apr 13
I don't understand why you could not have told the truth. You told us. The results would be the same except you would no longer feel guilty.
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@dagami (1162)
• Rome, Italy
21 Apr 13
i guess i didn't express that comment clearly. what i meant was he would have made me feel guilty had i told him that i was choosong the afternoon job. i would still feel bad in both ways. the fact that i didn't tell him the truth avoided his getting disappointed.
• United States
21 Apr 13
Truth is always the best policy. There is no such thing as a white lie. It's just a lie. That is why you feel guilty, you know it was wrong. Have you ever heard the old saying...Oh what tangled webs we weave, when we practice to deceive. It will catch up to you somehow. Honesty is always the best policy.
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@dagami (1162)
• Rome, Italy
21 Apr 13
i think deceit would be a strong word for that. i wanted to avoid getting him disappointed that i was choosing this afternoon job.
@roshigo58 (4871)
• Pune, India
21 Apr 13
Hi, You should not feel guilty. Sometimes we have to tell lie for our convenience. When we tell lie for the goodness of others then we don't fell guilty. But when we tell lie for our goodness then we feel guilty. the situation in your city forced you to do so. So don't be upset. This is life.
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@dagami (1162)
• Rome, Italy
21 Apr 13
i felt guilty because i knew it is wrong to tell a lie. however, he would have made me feel bad too had i told him the truth. and he would have been disappointed in knowing i was choosing the afternoon job over than taking his child to school.
@JohnRok1 (2051)
19 Apr 13
I have to agree with those who say that it was a lie and it was wrong. And just to show you it wasn't white, what if your landlord would have preferred to increase your pay by the difference between your afternoon and morning jobs, rather than make his little woman get up so early in the morning? And the fact that you take the last bus in the morning might make him suspect that you don't really have an interview for another afternoon job. However, how many men in Italy expect a woman to tell the truth?
1 person likes this
@dagami (1162)
• Rome, Italy
19 Apr 13
the apartment that i rent is a little distant from their house so he won't see me. i wouldn't have accepted had he offered to pay me more. it's my payday today so i needed to go there. although, i really doubt if this is possible. my landlord pays me 8 euros for this morning job. it takes me around 30-40mins trip, back and forth. her daughter has classes even on saturdays and since i don't work saturday afternoons, he sometimes requests me to get her and he asks for a discount if i make two trips. instead of 16 euros, he pays me 15!
@tinayu (214)
• China
19 Apr 13
don't feel fuilty.in my opinion, some white lies are necessary in our lives.the prerequisite is that you can't hurt others.my husband sometimes told white lies to me.he said that i was the most beautiful woman in the world.he said that my new dress was most suitable for me without his eyes on it at all.he said that i was normal and didn't need to lose a little weight, but the fact was i really put two kilos weight.i know that he was telling some white lies.but i can feel his sincerity.if you really tell a white lie ,i just want to advise you not to break it.when some one gets the truth, he would be sad.
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@dagami (1162)
• Rome, Italy
19 Apr 13
you're husband is sweet. i know that i have to be very careful so he will not know about it. they are a nice family and i've been renting this apartment of theirs for more than two years.
• Philippines
19 Apr 13
it's not white, it is a lie. it should have been better if you have been upfront and told your landlord your real intention. you have a valid reason and i'm sure he will understand. what do you think will your landlord do if he learned about it?
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@dagami (1162)
• Rome, Italy
19 Apr 13
knowing him, i don't think he would that's why i cooked up that sory about the interview. there is no possibility that he will get to know about it since only my husband knows and he won't tell. however, if he discovers, then i'll tell him i'm sorry but i did that because i know he wouldn't have understood.
• United States
18 Apr 13
You should feel guilty because you knew it was wrong. but,there is nothing you could have done about the situation you were in. I would not continue to be feeling this way knowing you had no other option.
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@dagami (1162)
• Rome, Italy
19 Apr 13
actually i could have driven the van but i just didn't want to get stuck in the traffic and to go through the hassle of finding parking space.
@marguicha (99970)
• Chile
18 Apr 13
You should not feel guilty. In case of necessity, we must always look after our own safety. I did not even send my children to school, many years ago, on specially problematic days. I had a very good imagination to use when an explanation was needed. safety was more important.
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@dagami (1162)
• Rome, Italy
18 Apr 13
actually my decision was based on the income. i decided that i would be getting less if i take my landlord's daughter to school because i would miss the afternoon job which pays higher. but you're right. i too have a very good imagination.
• Philippines
18 Apr 13
You should not feel guilty about it, its your decision to tell white lies, we tend to tell lies for our own good. I don't regret or feel guilt when i make a decisions because its my choice, i must be ready to face the consequences of my doings no matter what it is.
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@dagami (1162)
• Rome, Italy
18 Apr 13
i feel guilty because i know i did something wrong. but you're right, it was my decision to miss this morning job and go to the other one. i weighed the circumstances and i know that my landlady will not be harmed if she wakes up early tomorrow morning to take her daughter to school.
• Romania
28 Apr 13
hmm....yes and no this is a hardy answer to give :P