Do you feel that your spouse should be your best friend?
January 1, 2014 11:51am CST
I feel that before people marry they should really get to know one another. How do you all feel?
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• Blacktown, Australia
2 Jan 14
My husband and I became friends when we first met and began a more intimate relationship 2 years later, we married 2 years after that. We will celebrate our 34th Wedding Anniversary in June this year. We are still best friends today. However, I can't say I recommend this as a pre-requisite to marriage as I have heard and met people who barely knew each other before they married and their unions have proven the test of time. I have actually met more people who were friends before they were married and separated some time later. Too many variants to be able to say which situation is the most ideal.
• Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
2 Jan 14
I'm 'of different minds' about it. On one mind, I agree; because one's best-friend is USUALLY oneself, and a spouse is Divinely Commanded to be "a help, meet for oneself" (and the first step in such a mating is that the 'help' is "bone of (one's own) bone, flesh of (one's own) flesh"). On another mind, I disagree with the order of events---I think it should be more like 'you take them as you find them, and MAKE THEM INTO your best-friend!' (their "reasons for which they/you are willing to bend" & "the reasons for which you/they WISH them/you to bend" being 'what attracts-you to them & -them to you). These are met with a mind that believes that one is not the same creature after marriage as they were before ... sort of like if one grows an extra pair of eyes & ears & arms & legs. So one should not pre-suppose the new creature one will help create.
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