What is an Appropriate Age for Kids to Start Dating?

United States
April 29, 2016 4:59pm CST
My boyfriend and I were having this discussion just now about what is a good age for kids to start dating. We were watching this cute video on a father telling his four year old daughter that she can't have a boyfriend. She was telling him otherwise. I think ideas change as you get older and have your own kids. I'm not sure. I might be alone on this one. However, I'm curious what your thoughts are. What do you think is a good age for kids to start having boyfriends and girlfriends?
18 people like this
25 responses
@mommaj (22780)
• United States
29 Apr 16
I think 16 years old is a good age for kids to have boyfriends/girlfriends. They are old enough to drive so they are old enough to date. By that time they should be old enough to be responsible with their body. Personally, my daughter isn't dating until she is 30.
4 people like this
• United States
29 Apr 16
I think that's a good point. They should be old enough to be responsible with their bodies. 30 also sounds like a good age. lol :)
4 people like this
@mommaj (22780)
• United States
29 Apr 16
@pinkCardigangirl Yep, for my kid at least 30. When she gets closer I am sure it will go up.
1 person likes this
• United States
29 Apr 16
@mommaj Ha ha ha! You're not alone my friend!
1 person likes this
@BelleStarr (39055)
• United States
29 Apr 16
I think High School is when dating begins. Before that groups only.
3 people like this
• United States
29 Apr 16
Yeah, I think that is where it begins.
@jstory07 (68288)
• Roseburg, Oregon
29 Apr 16
I agree group only until high school.
1 person likes this
• United States
29 Apr 16
@jstory07 I'm thinking group even in high school. lol :)
1 person likes this
@jstory07 (68288)
• Roseburg, Oregon
29 Apr 16
Kids should not go on a date alone until they are sixteen and the parents of the girl should meet the guy.
2 people like this
@mommaj (22780)
• United States
29 Apr 16
Ha, meet the guy? Are you kidding! I am riding in the back of the car the whole night. NO! Better yet she is riding in the back of the car the whole night and I will sit beside of him!
2 people like this
• United States
29 Apr 16
I definitely agree that parents should meet the guy.
1 person likes this
@mommaj (22780)
• United States
29 Apr 16
@pinkCardigangirl I'm with you two on that! Like I said, he wants to see her I'm going to tag along. LOL
@Dishari (700)
29 Apr 16
That is quite an interesting topic to think about. Well maturity levels vary from person to person, i.e., kid to kid. So the appropriate age for a kid to start dating may differ. According to me, getting to teenage is a bare minimum.
2 people like this
@Dishari (700)
29 Apr 16
But I wouldn't mind kids dating if they look this cute together!
3 people like this
• United States
29 Apr 16
I agree, maturity differs from kid to kid. :)
1 person likes this
• United States
29 Apr 16
@Dishari ha ha and AW!!! That is such a cute picture! :)
• United States
29 Apr 16
I believe the second year in high school is the best age. However, those raging hormones come into play and it could be a tricky situation.
2 people like this
• United States
29 Apr 16
I always hear the teenage years are tough!
1 person likes this
• United States
29 Apr 16
@pinkCardigangirl I had 2 girls close in age and 2 boys who are twins. Yeah I had a rough time.
1 person likes this
• United States
29 Apr 16
@ElusiveButterfly That does sound rough. My son is 16 but he's into sports and doesn't have time for dating. Presently, I'm lucky there.
1 person likes this
@jndlponti (2413)
• Philippines
30 Apr 16
I have kids of my own..and the eldest is already 8years old. But never had it cross in my mind with the dating. Most probably I would cross the bridge when we get there. Cannot say exact age. But I hope later. Haha
1 person likes this
• United States
30 Apr 16
Ha ha yes! Later. :)
@jndlponti (2413)
• Philippines
30 Apr 16
@pinkCardigangirl Most probably when she is already in the senior high. I think by that time she is old enough to understand the pros and cons in dating.
1 person likes this
• United States
30 Apr 16
@jndlponti The older the better I think. I know that's not always how it happens, but there are a lot of things to consider.
1 person likes this
@polyxena (2576)
• Sturgis, Michigan
2 May 16
My mom's rule was 16. I used to think it was stupid and made zero sense why'd she'd say that, but now being a mother myself, and imagining children dating. I see why she had that rule. Kids need to focus on school work, and life ahead of them instead of working about their girlfriend/boyfriend..
1 person likes this
• United States
2 May 16
I couldn't agree more. I mean I don't judge. To each their own, but I think their focus should be somewhere else. Discover who they are as an individual. That doesn't mean it happens. lol.
@polyxena (2576)
• Sturgis, Michigan
2 May 16
@pinkCardigangirl Exactly, thinking back at my life, I had no clue what I liked or who I was even at 16.
1 person likes this
• United States
2 May 16
@polyxena Yes! But at the time I thought I knew so much. lol
• United States
30 Apr 16
It all depends upon the definition of the terms. Dating or boyfriend mean different things to different people at different ages. My first date was when I was in the 5th grade (10 years old). I went to the formal military academy dinner dance with the boy next door. My second date was the same boy, same event one year later. My third was the same event with his friend, since I was now taller than my neighbor. But I didn't really start "dating" until the 19th grade.
1 person likes this
• United States
30 Apr 16
That is true. Everyone has different definitions of dating, and there are different things to consider such as the event, who it's with, and so on.
1 person likes this
• United States
30 Apr 16
@pinkCardigangirl It was a great way to be introduced to the whole dating scene. I wore a red satin formal dress from Saks and a corsage on my wrist. The boys all wore dress uniforms and white gloves. So cool.
1 person likes this
• United States
30 Apr 16
@ElizabethWallace I bet it was great! I hope you have pictures to remember those days. :)
1 person likes this
@toniganzon (51693)
• Philippines
30 Apr 16
Kids? No way hahaha! I'm a mother of a 12-year old boy and the truth is I don't mind if he goes out on a date, but it should just be a friendly date. My son is going into an adolescent age but his mentality is still that of a kid. Fortunately, we are open to each other and he tells me almost everything. I'm crossing my fingers.
1 person likes this
• United States
30 Apr 16
I think that's important too. The openness about what is happening.
1 person likes this
@toniganzon (51693)
• Philippines
1 May 16
@pinkCardigangirl He's my only son and I have all my attention to him. We're friends but I'm still his mom.
1 person likes this
• United States
2 May 16
@toniganzon I think that's wonderful!!!
1 person likes this
• United States
30 Apr 16
16 'n i'll not budge!
1 person likes this
• United States
30 Apr 16
I think many members would agree with you. I think 16 AT LEAST too. But then I look at my 3 year old daughter and think hmmm...maybe older. lol :)
1 person likes this
• United States
30 Apr 16
@pinkCardigangirl back home, ya didn't go'n dates solo 'til ya were 18 - e'en then such was frowned 'pon. this didn't mean double datin' with friends. noperz, ya'd kinfolk'n tow. many families still require such.
1 person likes this
• United States
30 Apr 16
@crazyhorseladycx I think my mom was watching a show where the father wouldn't let her daughter go anywhere with a boy unless he was there.
1 person likes this
@OneOfMany (12420)
• United States
30 Apr 16
I had a girlfriend when I was 5. We used to kiss on the playground or in the corner. Then she moved away and I was too sad to kiss again for a long time. Innocent love is fun, but it can be heart breaking if it's deep.
1 person likes this
• United States
30 Apr 16
Your story is cute. Love is always heartbreaking when it doesn't work out. :(
1 person likes this
@OneOfMany (12420)
• United States
30 Apr 16
@pinkCardigangirl I was good at getting girlfriends when I was younger, now it's really difficult to find anyone! The good ol' days are gone!
1 person likes this
• United States
30 Apr 16
@OneOfMany I think things get complicated as we get older, and the older we get we become more strict on who we date. At least that's been my experience.
1 person likes this
@VivaLaDani13 (20495)
• Perth, Australia
14 Jun 16
@pinkCardigangirl Good question. It's very hard for me to say since I don't have kids of my own so I've never put much thought into but for some reason I want to say 16.
1 person likes this
@Daljinder (21710)
• India
8 Feb 17
@VivaLaDani13 Let's debate the heck outta it. 16 is too young for me! My son or daughter won't be dating until 18 or until they are mature enough to be independent even if at 16
1 person likes this
• Perth, Australia
11 Feb 17
@Daljinder lol good point!
1 person likes this
@Daljinder (21710)
• India
12 Feb 17
@VivaLaDani13 Drat! Now how am I supposed to debate that?
1 person likes this
@ridingbet (55876)
• Philippines
30 Apr 16
i had my first BF when i was in my senior college, and it was not even real love but a bet among us dabarkads.
1 person likes this
• United States
30 Apr 16
Ha ha what was the bet?
1 person likes this
@ridingbet (55876)
• Philippines
1 May 16
@Daljinder (21710)
• India
14 Jun 16
@pinkCardigangirl Your question What do you think is a good age for kids to start having boyfriends and girlfriends? itself has the answer. Kids and boyfriends / girlfriends don't mix for me. I feel teenage is not an age for dating. Teenage is already a time when kids are already going from so many things physical change, growing up, leaving their childhood behind, entering into adulthood, then competitions at school, peer pressure, bullying, studies......geez the list is long. Why put the pressure of a relationship on kids? P. S. @VivaLaDani13 is the culprit! I am innocent.
1 person likes this
• Perth, Australia
11 Feb 17
@Daljinder ................BAHAHAAHAHAHAAHA
1 person likes this
@Hate2Iron (7953)
• Canada
30 Apr 16
I guess it all depends on what they mean by boyfriend and girlfriend. My 4 year old granddaughter has 3 boyfriends at the moment. I think that we are safe lol! I think that I had to be in high school! lol
1 person likes this
• United States
2 May 16
Ha ha yes! I think she's safe. :)
@OreoBrownie (3640)
• Elberton, Georgia
30 Apr 16
It's hard to say. Kids get in relationships and then sometimes become parents. I think there has to be a level of maturity. I couldn't date until 17 and not without an adult with us. I didn't like it but I stayed a virgin till I married.
1 person likes this
• United States
2 May 16
I think 17 is a good age. 18,19, in their 20's is good too! :) Can I ask? How was it having an adult with you during a date? Did you feel that it was good or did you resent it? You don't have to answer if you don't want to. I'm just curious. :)
• Austin, Texas
30 Apr 16
Appropriate age? I guess that depends on the “maturity age”. Chronological age might not be a good gauge. Last two years of high school is probably OK. Not before that. My opinion. But this was my mother's advice and I am glad I followed it. She told me not to get serious about dating while in high school and focus on getting my education. She said wait until I got to college and even then … don't feel compelled to rush into any relationship. She said it was it more important to learn how to be able to take care of myself, with or without a mate. She said to enjoy my youth and my freedom as a single person. But if I wanted to date, don't bother dating somebody who wouldn't be a suitable life partner.
• United States
30 Apr 16
I think that's the best advice that can be given. I want that for my daughter when that time comes. :)
1 person likes this
@sharon6345 (130945)
• United States
30 Apr 16
I think kids choose on their own when they are dating when they go to school. When they feel like telling mom and dad about liking about most often they already been kissed.
1 person likes this
• United States
2 May 16
Yes. I think I kissed my first boy in 7th grade, and my parents knew nothing of it.
@db20747 (8484)
• Washington, District Of Columbia
30 Apr 16
35- And we'll hear no more of it!!
1 person likes this
• United States
2 May 16
Thirties sound good. lol :)
@karjatwala (1133)
• Pune, India
30 Apr 16
A difficult question to answeer, but I strongly feet not less than 16
1 person likes this
• United States
30 Apr 16
I think I would agree with you. It's a difficult question to consider and 16 the bare minimum. :)