Do you Reflect on Your Behavior?

Looking at ourselves
@Shiva49 (26204)
Singapore
June 23, 2016 10:06am CST
We are observant of how others behave, but do we also reflect upon our own behavior? It is only natural for us to understand others and even at times jump to conclusions, but how aware are we about how we come across to others? I have always taken care to look at myself from others’ point of view, how I connect, even critically. This helps make the interaction meaningful and enjoyable. If I go half way others get the right message too. Upon reflection I have realized that life is a learning process and one can learn even from a child. One does not want to take advantage of children. Likewise, when we have good intentions others will also be encouraged to raise the bar. In personal lives too we should be aware that those who matter will appreciate us more when we go more than half way and not halfhearted. How about you on this rather basic of how we present ourselves? Image from Wikimedia
14 people like this
16 responses
@responsiveme (22926)
• India
23 Jun 16
Sometimes I do reflect . And I say I shouldn't have behaved like that. Actually we live and learn from experiences.:)
4 people like this
@Shiva49 (26204)
• Singapore
23 Jun 16
Good to reflect as we ourselves may not be above blame. And we tend to take our loved ones for granted over time - siva
4 people like this
• India
27 Jun 16
@Marty1 Thats tough. friends and family are a great support system. And blessed are those who have sisters.Keep well.
2 people like this
• India
27 Jun 16
@Marty1 Glad for you.:)
1 person likes this
@JudyEv (325854)
• Rockingham, Australia
24 Jun 16
I try to watch my behaviour and I try to be as pleasant to those close to me as I am to strangers. Some people drop their manners around their own family and can be rude to their spouse when out in company. I don't like that.
3 people like this
@cacay1 (83223)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
26 Jun 16
@JudyEv, there are many like them in the world so rude to their own family and good at others.
3 people like this
@JudyEv (325854)
• Rockingham, Australia
24 Jun 16
@Shiva49 That's very sad.
2 people like this
@Shiva49 (26204)
• Singapore
26 Jun 16
@Marty1 Sometimes we lose it but we owe them an apology. We should also be ready to forgive and even forget as we are human prone to occasional unreasonable behavior - siva
2 people like this
@salonga (27775)
• Philippines
24 Jun 16
Yes I do reflect on my behavior, because I am very concerned with how my behavior will affect my relationship to others.
3 people like this
@salonga (27775)
• Philippines
24 Jun 16
@Shiva49 So sad for those kind of folks.
2 people like this
@Shiva49 (26204)
• Singapore
24 Jun 16
That is the right way. I see few who are oblivious how obnoxious they are. Obviously, they have no clue that they are digging their own grave! I may add, as a matter of fact, when they pass on, others are relieved with 'good riddance" - siva
2 people like this
@Shiva49 (26204)
• Singapore
25 Jun 16
@salonga That is why they should also reflect on their actions and try to change little by little - siva
1 person likes this
@SIMPLYD (90722)
• Philippines
24 Jun 16
I always see to it that in my interaction , i won't hurt feelings . And as far as i can reflect , i am always following it .
3 people like this
@SIMPLYD (90722)
• Philippines
24 Jun 16
@Shiva49 We just have to understand those people .
2 people like this
@Shiva49 (26204)
• Singapore
24 Jun 16
That is the way to go about our daily lives. I have to deal with few who are quite difficult and unpredictable - siva
3 people like this
@Shiva49 (26204)
• Singapore
24 Jun 16
@SIMPLYD Yes coexist with them too! siva
2 people like this
• Eugene, Oregon
23 Jun 16
I constantly reflect on my behavior and, in retrospect, am not always pleased. I suppose that is the price of being a rather outgoing introvert, a contradiction in terms.
3 people like this
@cacay1 (83223)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
26 Jun 16
I think only those hearts made of stone cannot reflect ; they do not want to be corrected.
3 people like this
@Shiva49 (26204)
• Singapore
26 Jun 16
@cacay1 Sadly they are everywhere too. They leave a scar hard to heal - siva
1 person likes this
@Shiva49 (26204)
• Singapore
24 Jun 16
I do that especially when I realize I was unfair and others might have been hurt. Overall, I am a very happy person and only a happy person can spread happiness and the contrary is also true! siva
1 person likes this
27 Jun 16
While reflecting and introspecting, I believe, are two best ways to improve oneself, every individual has his own way of acquiring and meeting such ends. I am a person who is given to much frequent bouts of introspection therefore it becomes imperative for me to reflect upon my own manner of conduct. I write a diary and I make it a point to go through it every once in a while so that I may notice the way my writing has evolved (for words are the direct manifestation of thoughts) and thus I figure out what has improved in me or say, what needs to be improved further.
2 people like this
@Shiva49 (26204)
• Singapore
27 Jun 16
Well said, I reflect and ponder all the time. It is interesting to analyze how our behavior impacts and evokes a response. I am straight forward and mean what I say and say what I mean leaving little room for any misunderstanding. Then if something is not in order I try to probe further so that I plug that loophole too. This attitude serves us well in personal and work life. Friends will know who we really are or we get good ones than those who beat about the bush, wishy-washy ones, who drag us into controversies that we can do without. Such an approach mold our character and help to make us better human beings - siva
2 people like this
@Shiva49 (26204)
• Singapore
27 Jun 16
@The_Bong_Woman A friend in need is a friend indeed. To be honest, I hardly have them I relate to very few as I find time is a rare commodity nowadays. It is more of hi/bye culture now. It is said if we have friends like some, we do not need enemies! However, I do go out of the way to help those in need and that is so fulfilling. The less the better; quality over quantity like passing them through reverse osmosis process so that only the pure survive! siva
2 people like this
27 Jun 16
@Shiva49 True Sir. Earlier it irked me to see others having giant "friend circles" as they call it and me with only a handful of people for companionship but it is now that I understand that these "friend circles" are simply agglomeration of people who see benefits in each other and care very little for each other while my handful ones are the very people who help me evolve into a better human being.
2 people like this
@allknowing (130064)
• India
27 Jun 16
I would rather wait for feedback from those who I trust and this is how I come to know how disgusting I have been sometimes (lol)
2 people like this
@allknowing (130064)
• India
28 Jun 16
@Shiva49 Time tells us whether the feedback has been right.
2 people like this
@Shiva49 (26204)
• Singapore
27 Jun 16
Yes, we need to have those who give us the right feedback or we could change for the worse just like some give us the wrong direction to a place! siva
2 people like this
@flapiz (22403)
• United Kingdom
25 Jun 16
I've always been sensitive of how others perceive me and I do reflect on my behaviour. I think it's helpful for self development and growth.
2 people like this
@flapiz (22403)
• United Kingdom
26 Jun 16
@Shiva49 There are aspects in us that only other people can make us aware of. It could be as simple as "I being a snorer when I'm asleep" or "me being over sensitive to issues". But whatever it is we can learn from others.
2 people like this
@Shiva49 (26204)
• Singapore
26 Jun 16
It is good to self-evaluate our actions even critically. And we can always learn from others as there are those worthy to emulate everywhere. They are a breath of fresh air and make our lives worthwhile too - siva
2 people like this
@Shiva49 (26204)
• Singapore
27 Jun 16
@flapiz Yes, that self-awareness and openness by themselves will lead to a better person - siva
2 people like this
@Drosophila (16573)
• Ireland
13 Jul 16
I do.. and I don't. It depends on the situation and the person. If I feel that I should have handled the thing/person better, sure I would look at improvement points. it's just so I don't run into the same problem again in future. But I won't over think it, after all, what's done is done. However.. There are somethings I simply don't care about. Then I just won't waste mental energy in hashing it over. Bigger fish to fry 'n' all. To quote my favourite Rapper Jay-Z, "I have 99 problems.. well and that ain't one!"
2 people like this
@Shiva49 (26204)
• Singapore
14 Jul 16
I also don't waste much time reflecting on my actions. However, I am subconsciously aware how I come across with - treat others like you wish to be treated - in fact, better. This has brought me real fulfillment. Most appreciate but few take advantage but I know who to watch out for better now - siva
1 person likes this
@Drosophila (16573)
• Ireland
14 Jul 16
@Shiva49 oh I see what ya mean.. but no am not subconsciously aware of anything if am behaving in what the society deem as "normal behaviour"
1 person likes this
@TheHorse (205820)
• Walnut Creek, California
23 Sep 16
I sometimes ponder how others perceive me. I like to be challenging, but not too much so.
1 person likes this
@TheHorse (205820)
• Walnut Creek, California
26 Sep 16
@Shiva49 But what if I don't know who I really am? Many people are unclear about who they are.
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@Shiva49 (26204)
• Singapore
26 Sep 16
@TheHorse I take myself as part of a whole - a meaningful role to play or just a cog in the wheel. I want to be aware that my role matters and that I did my best. I do not want to upset the rhythm of the whole process but try my best as a co-creator despite a drop in the ocean - siva
@Shiva49 (26204)
• Singapore
24 Sep 16
I am quite honest and upfront how I come across and that make it clear to others who I really am. When I treat others better than I expect to be treated that clears the path for a comfortable ride - siva
1 person likes this
@cacay1 (83223)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
26 Jun 16
Shiva, congrats this is a very scholarly article.In my own, of course, i also evaluate my action if acceptable by others or not. If I sensed my action or behavior inappropriate, I instantly make a change.
2 people like this
@Shiva49 (26204)
• Singapore
26 Jun 16
Thanks Erly for your support and encouragement. We tend to take our actions for granted and, maybe, blissfully unaware of how we come across. When others behave in a way we should also take a look at ourselves why we get such a response. My dealings seek their cooperation - siva
1 person likes this
@aarifa (1210)
• India
23 Jun 16
We are all learners of the world..take good.. avoid bad ...simple to said..but difficult to follow
2 people like this
@Shiva49 (26204)
• Singapore
24 Jun 16
For our betterment and of others, we should go more than half way. Looking at how we behave is the first step for better understanding - siva
2 people like this
@innertalks (21026)
• Australia
24 Jun 16
Who is pouring what into your cup?
I never spend too much time looking back at my behaviour, unless I have a reason to. When I feel that I could have acted better, or if I have some other type of uncomfortable feeling about it, I will try to pinpoint this further, to see if I can then work out how I might handle the situation better the next time that a similar scenario presents itself to me. Generally though, is it good for us to reflect about how we have acted at times, or is it better to meditate, or, as I often do, to ask our higher self about it, instead? The emptiness of life is filled from the cup of love, which our soul and God hold at our lips. (These are our various life experiences) By all means, we should succour the taste, and think about how it tastes, or about how each experience has gone. We cannot do this alone though. You should not block out the total you, to just try to find answers from your mind alone. We cannot find out why we act as we do, until we allow all parts of ourselves to answer to "us", the real us. This includes our mind, our emotions, our soul, and even God's spirit in us. Each part of us has each got its own answers, as much as they should do so too. We need to share our reflections from each part of our self to each other part, so as we are not going it solely alone. In all things, we must be connected to as much as possible, as it's possible, for us to be connected to then. One part of us acts as a mirror to another part usually. Our emotions for example will lead us to our thoughts, and vice versa.
@innertalks (21026)
• Australia
24 Jun 16
@Shiva49 Thanks siva, I should reflect more on why I am always so philosophical too I suspect, but if I did, I wonder which part of me would win, or try to win, the philosophical debate that might result from my doing this...LOL... That's a good technique to ask someone to help solve the problem, even if it is them causing you the problem! They might come to a realisation or two along the way then too.
@Shiva49 (26204)
• Singapore
24 Jun 16
@innertalks I tend to find comfort in philosophy too as there are many interpretations to justify "anything"! I try to put others at ease but should not encroach on their territory, maybe stretch my boundary that bit! siva
1 person likes this
@Shiva49 (26204)
• Singapore
24 Jun 16
A good and philosophical take Steve, thanks. I raised this as I find many tend to complain how others behave but the problem could well lie with them! When we are open-minded and frank then half the battle is won. I am always positive even when I feel apprehensive of the outcome. I ask the other about how they can help me out of difficult situations especially for work related issues and when I deal with the government offices. That breaks the ice and I get useful responses and help to know where I stand better. In personal matters too I am more self-critical when things sour and work harder to get back to placid waters. I feel a lot depend on me and try to keep up with the change while at the same time I am open with my views - siva
1 person likes this
• United States
23 Jun 16
I do look on my behavior and try to analyze it to make sure I'm not way out there.
2 people like this
@Shiva49 (26204)
• Singapore
24 Jun 16
When we are above board, others too get the message. Then all are winners - siva
1 person likes this
@pumpkinjam (8540)
• United Kingdom
16 Jan 17
I think I usually behave respectably, even with people who don't really deserve respect. There are times when I wonder if something I've thought, an opinion, or an act was the right thing. It's not usually things I've done. It's usually things I think or say/don't say. I'll wonder if I am wrong for thinking something or for not saying something. I have wondered, at times, how I come across to others but never really made any conscious efforts about it.
1 person likes this
@Shiva49 (26204)
• Singapore
16 Jan 17
Our world will be a much better place if we all think and act from the others' point of view and where they come from. To extrapolate, for some cultures democracy may not be practical or we have to give them time to evolve. But they have been force-fed with heavy doses that has disoriented some countries to the extent they are now worse off! Individuals too tend to proffer unsolicited advice that can be grating. We should be helpful but also know not to cross the line. I look for signals and instantly know thus far and no more even while offering help of any kind! siva
• Austin, Texas
15 Aug 16
Doesn't everyone reflect on their own behavior? Surely we all know that not one of us is perfect.
1 person likes this
• Austin, Texas
16 Aug 16
@Shiva49 - Yeah. I get a lot of nudges.
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@Shiva49 (26204)
• Singapore
16 Aug 16
Normally we tend to be critical when others go overboard with their behavior and attitude. And we overlook our own faults. Those who are interested in our welfare will nudge us in the proper direction - siva
1 person likes this
@Shiva49 (26204)
• Singapore
17 Aug 16
@cmoneyspinner Yes, some are too subtle too and we should keep our eyes and ears open! siva
1 person likes this