Relatives are not always family

@1creekgirl (40636)
United States
December 5, 2016 1:57pm CST
I used to think that relatives and family were the same thing, but they're not. We can't help what set of people we were born into or who happens to share our DNA. As with most, there are a few we'd just as soon not be clumped in with. They're technically part of our gene pool but what can you do? Family, on the other hand, is not just who shares your ancestry, but who you choose to be part of your family. I have some relatives who are just that: relatives. But I have some family members who aren't really related to me at all. They're part of my family because I choose them to be and I know they feel the same way. The relatives? Well, they're just that.
17 people like this
18 responses
• Peoria, Arizona
5 Dec 16
Anyone you can love is your family, friends can be family, pets of course they are family, friend's pets are family. I have a rule of you have to love your family, the family you share blood with, but you do not have to like them. My family is dread awful, but I'll love them because that's the point of the relations I guess. My friends are more of my family because I actually like them and of course I love them. DNA means nothing, love means all.
3 people like this
@1creekgirl (40636)
• United States
5 Dec 16
I love your comment "DNA means nothing, love means all." !!! That should be cross-stitched somewhere.
1 person likes this
• Valdosta, Georgia
5 Dec 16
I absolutely agree with you! I have a friend who I consider to be my family, she's been amazing since we have met and she would do anything for me and vice versa. =)
2 people like this
@1creekgirl (40636)
• United States
6 Dec 16
You are blessed to have such a good friend.
1 person likes this
@pumpkinjam (8539)
• United Kingdom
23 Feb 17
I certainly agree with that. I have relatives whom I barely know. I don't think I really have anyone I consider family who isn't related unless you count my partner's family but they will be related by marriage once I marry him. As for his family, I wish his eldest daughter would see that he is still her Dad, despite not sharing DNA.
1 person likes this
• United Kingdom
23 Feb 17
@1creekgirl Certainly. My youngest son and eldest step-daughter both have 'fathers' who don't bother with them. They also both have my partner who does his best to be a Dad. My son calls him Daddy out of choice because that's what he is to him. Unfortunately, the situation with the step-daughter has been made difficult by the mother but my partner is still her dad, and she is still his little girl, even though she's 23!
@1creekgirl (40636)
• United States
23 Feb 17
You are right, DNA doesn't mean anything in relationships.
1 person likes this
@allknowing (130168)
• India
5 Dec 16
What you feel is universal. It's time we move on and seek those in society with whom we can relate.
1 person likes this
@1creekgirl (40636)
• United States
6 Dec 16
True, we sometimes waste our love and concern on relatives who don't care about us.
1 person likes this
@allknowing (130168)
• India
6 Dec 16
@1creekgirl Everyone is living in a fool's paradise really. There is nothing like family bonding anymore.
1 person likes this
@1creekgirl (40636)
• United States
6 Dec 16
@allknowing Well, I don't totally agree with that. My husband and I, our kids and grandkids are all close. We have our issues every so often, but we work them out.
1 person likes this
@moffittjc (118587)
• Gainesville, Florida
9 Dec 16
I agree with you 100% on this! Very well said!
1 person likes this
@1creekgirl (40636)
• United States
9 Dec 16
Thanks, Jeff. It took me a long time to learn the difference.
1 person likes this
@moffittjc (118587)
• Gainesville, Florida
9 Dec 16
@1creekgirl Me too! In fact, I'm still learning the difference, and figuring out which ones are just relatives and which ones are truly family. It became more astute when my father passed away several months ago. It was a real eye-opener for me.
1 person likes this
@Hannihar (129572)
• Israel
8 May 18
@1creekgirl I have found that friends can be better family than family itself. We cannot choose what family we are born into but we can choose friends we want to spend time with that can be like a family to us when our family is not there for us.
1 person likes this
@1creekgirl (40636)
• United States
8 May 18
Very well said.
1 person likes this
@Hannihar (129572)
• Israel
8 May 18
@1creekgirl Thank you Vicki.
• Singapore
14 Dec 16
We will all have some weird characters somewhere within the family tree and these people are just biological links and nothing else. There's no connection, no feelings of kinship, nothing. Sometime I don't even find a kind word to describe one particular horrible person who is "existent" but luckily non-present in my life.
1 person likes this
@1creekgirl (40636)
• United States
15 Dec 16
I know exactly what you mean.
1 person likes this
• United States
7 Dec 16
adorable pic! i agree with ya, hon. i've more family that aint relatives than vice verse :)
1 person likes this
@1creekgirl (40636)
• United States
7 Dec 16
Same here!
1 person likes this
@MALUSE (69409)
• Germany
5 Dec 16
And then there are relatives who're horrible and can poison your life. In Italian, there is a saying: parenti / serpenti meaning: relatives / snakes.
1 person likes this
@1creekgirl (40636)
• United States
5 Dec 16
Wow, I have several parenti/sepenti!
1 person likes this
@Happy2BeMe (99390)
• Canada
5 Dec 16
1 person likes this
@blitzfrick (2890)
• United States
11 Dec 16
Einstein was right, and so are you: It's all relative.
1 person likes this
@1creekgirl (40636)
• United States
12 Dec 16
1 person likes this
@deadreak (653)
• Dagupan City, Philippines
6 Dec 16
i feel like my friends are close to me than my relative, I can not imagine why those thing happen, supposedly they close to you because in the first place you know each other, But that's not what is happening some envy of what you have instead of being happy if they so your life getting better.
1 person likes this
@1creekgirl (40636)
• United States
6 Dec 16
Thanks for your input.
8 Dec 16
Well said...am too fade up of sm of my relatives..n I always wonder do v really share same DNA or genetic element
1 person likes this
@1creekgirl (40636)
• United States
8 Dec 16
It makes you wonder, sometimes, doesn't it?
6 Dec 16
I agree!!.... All people who are genetically related to us can't be our family and at the same time people who have no genetic relation can be our family. A person can be called family not because they are related to us... but they genuinely feel and care for us... when we can't find that care and affection from relatives it's hard to call them as family. To call a person as family for namesake is worthless. Instead calling a true friend as family can make complete justification to the word FAMILY.
1 person likes this
@1creekgirl (40636)
• United States
6 Dec 16
Well said! We always make sure which group we're talking about.
1 person likes this
6 Dec 16
@1creekgirl yeah right!!!!. thank you
1 person likes this
@Stessia (192)
• Abuja, Nigeria
9 Dec 16
Relatives?... I don't relate with them.. I only keep those that keep me as family... We cant help the pool of relatives we are born into.. We can only choose the ones we relate to.. I love the people I call family.. Not everyone deserves that label.
1 person likes this
@1creekgirl (40636)
• United States
9 Dec 16
That really is true. You're blessed to have good friends and family.
@Stessia (192)
• Abuja, Nigeria
9 Dec 16
@1creekgirl yes, anyone that's got good friends and family is really blessed. He/she has got it all.
1 person likes this
@youless (112131)
• Guangzhou, China
6 Dec 16
I agree with you. Sometimes some relatives just have a little blood relationship with you and that's all. They can't even compare the close relationship with our friends.
1 person likes this
@1creekgirl (40636)
• United States
6 Dec 16
I think that people who have relatives who are also family are truly blessed.
1 person likes this
@Jackalyn (7559)
• Oxford, England
6 Dec 16
I have a couple of friends who are like sisters. Family means a lot to me, but I have quite a small one. I used to have a lot of older great aunts and uncles so over the years it dwindled down.
1 person likes this
@1creekgirl (40636)
• United States
6 Dec 16
You are very blessed to have such good friends.
@JudyEv (326191)
• Rockingham, Australia
6 Dec 16
There's a saying about being able to choose our friends (family in your terms I guess) but we're stuck with our relatives.
1 person likes this
@1creekgirl (40636)
• United States
6 Dec 16
That's true. We may be stuck with our relatives, but we can enjoy our family and friends.
1 person likes this
@Happy2BeMe (99390)
• Canada
5 Dec 16
This is so true. You can't choose your relatives. I have many dear people who I consider family and that I am blessed to have in my life.
1 person likes this
@1creekgirl (40636)
• United States
6 Dec 16
You understand the difference between family and relatives.
1 person likes this