Love Is In The Air

@YrNemo (1391)
August 4, 2017 8:50am CST
Heard an interesting love story today. She, a naive but attractive and highly educated Singaporean in her mid 30s, has been engaged for a couple of years (or perhaps longer) to a Nigerian (Christian) minister. The odd thing about it is, both have never met each other in real life. The engagement took place in cyber. I was shown the fiance's photo from Nigeria. He looked handsome but youngish, in his mid 20s. (The lady had told me that her loving fiance was older than her, in his early 40s and that she would trust him with her life.) Since one of my best friends happened to be black African, and her first two sons, 20ish, looked similar to this Nigerian minister, I don't know what to think. Would you engage (for real) to anyone from the cyber world with the view to marriage, thinking that love would conquer all? (I could believe in the 'falling in love' part, but to have a cyber fiance for years without ever seeing the guy for real? )
16 people like this
18 responses
@LadyDuck (102994)
• Switzerland
4 Aug
I believe that two people must meet and discuss one in front of the other before deciding if they are made to live together.
5 people like this
@YrNemo (1391)
5 Aug
I agree wholeheartedly with you, but perhaps somewhere out there, there are some lonely hearts who decide to trust naively more in scoundrels? (This case doesn't sound good, but I can't convince her.)
4 people like this
@LadyDuck (102994)
• Switzerland
5 Aug
@YrNemo There are many lonely hearts who decide to have faith and when they finally meat the one they dated online find out that it was a scam.
3 people like this
@YrNemo (1391)
5 Aug
@LadyDuck I read about those cases, and felt extremely sad for those unlucky & too trusting souls.
2 people like this
@salonga (27763)
• Philippines
5 Aug
i don't think I will enter into cyber relationship. That is quite risky. I have to know very well the person before I could ever trust and fall in love.
3 people like this
@YrNemo (1391)
5 Aug
That guy must have done something right to make the lady trusting him that much.
1 person likes this
@sol_cee (11293)
• Japan
5 Aug
It might work. Their faith, a big factor.
3 people like this
@YrNemo (1391)
5 Aug
Ah, faith! the magical word...
1 person likes this
@garymarsh6 (11721)
• United Kingdom
4 Aug
No absolutely no way, There are many con merchants out there praying on young innocent people. This smells like a red fish to me. I think she could be being conned!
3 people like this
@YrNemo (1391)
5 Aug
I heard similar cases with the victims were lonely widows or divorcees from the US or UK. A few came to Africa to build the love nest with their intendeds, bringing along all the hard cash they had, as instructed. They got killed right in their hotel rooms.
1 person likes this
@holdoors (528)
• Malaysia
4 Aug
My personal opinion is that it's important to meet each other in real life before committing to any relationships. I find this story to be extraordinary. It could really happen but is their engagement valid or is it purely a verbal agreement ?
3 people like this
@YrNemo (1391)
5 Aug
Guess in certain countries, renege on an engagement is not a done thing, but in many modern countries these days, I don't think 'engagement' is a serious matter. The odd thing about this case is, they never met each other in real life (plenty of couples these days tend to just live with each other first - long before committing to each other via engagement). Extra odd, because the lady had complete trust in the authenticity of this unseen fiance.
1 person likes this
@DianneN (49644)
• United States
4 Aug
I know people who have met online and have then met in person. After dating and getting to know one another, they married and lived happily ever after. Becoming engaged online isn't my cup of tea. That's just asking for trouble.
2 people like this
@YrNemo (1391)
5 Aug
I can't convince her to be careful, you know why? because he said he was a 'minister'... The magic word was there!
2 people like this
@DianneN (49644)
• United States
5 Aug
@YrNemo I see. I hope it's a real minister.
1 person likes this
@thelme55 (8785)
• Germany
15 Aug
@YrNemo I think I have read a discussion here about a Mylotter who was a minister but he had talked about women badly. I donĀ“t think just because he is a minister, he is a good man.
2 people like this
@bluesa (8252)
• Johannesburg, South Africa
5 Aug
I would have to spend real face to face time with someone before deciding on getting engaged @YrNemo , I know meeting on the net has worked out for some. But I am not certain about it at all.
2 people like this
@bluesa (8252)
• Johannesburg, South Africa
5 Aug
@YrNemo , oh wow, that is so creepy! Luckily he found out!
2 people like this
• United States
5 Aug
Oh wow that is crazy... how is that possible to be engaged cyber world? Did they exchange rings or just labeled each other engaged?. For all we know he can have a whole different life!
2 people like this
@YrNemo (1391)
5 Aug
I pointed that out to her, but she told me to be positive, to have some faith... 'As a minister, he must be good!' (her words!)
2 people like this
• United States
5 Aug
@YrNemo eek that's very concerning I hope all goes well
2 people like this
@1hopefulman (16318)
• Canada
4 Aug
I've delved into cyber dating and it did not work well for me but I'm sure that there are good experiences and bad experiences. I would recommend meeting the person quickly and if it goes well then continuing.
2 people like this
@YrNemo (1391)
5 Aug
Tell you what, if you said you were a minister of some Christian churches, you could have got a few wealthy followers by now...
2 people like this
@jstory07 (57082)
• Roseburg, Oregon
14 Aug
I think you need to fall in love with the person and get to know them first.
2 people like this
• Philippines
13 Aug
Most people get scammed for thousands or thousands of dollars @YrNemo But I don't want to generalize because some love story come true.
2 people like this
@Freelanzer (5435)
• Canada
10 Aug
No but I have heard other stories where it has been done and the women ended up being scammed for thousands of dollars
2 people like this
@SIMPLYD (72456)
• Philippines
9 Aug
That cannot be avoided if they keep on chatting and seeing each other on Skype. But if it is only through emails and pictures, I am afraid to trust someone like that. The cyber world is with different kinds of people, scammers and the like.
2 people like this
@paigea (19478)
• Canada
7 Aug
That sounds silly to me. I would have to meet the person. I did meet my husband online but the first time I met him in person is what I consider the first time I met him. I certainly didn't start to fall in love with him before I met him in person.
2 people like this
@Nawsheen (22898)
• Mauritius
16 Aug
This is definitely something that I will never do. It is so difficult to trust anyone those days.
1 person likes this
@YrNemo (1391)
16 Aug
You are smart. (too many con men out there these days - con women too of course! )
@shynu44 (2257)
4 Aug
thats truely a moving love story.
1 person likes this
@YrNemo (1391)
5 Aug
In a sense, it is, isn't it!
@FayeHazel (7173)
• United States
13 Aug
I don't blame you for your hesitation -- I have had many online romances through the years - thought I knew the person well, but by the time you get to meet them -- they are not who you thought they were at all. It is disappointing. I hope your friend will be alright
1 person likes this
@thelme55 (8785)
• Germany
15 Aug
No, I wouldn't if I am that woman. I have to see that man in person first. To know his real self. That is very risky. Who knows he is only acting good and in reality, he is a monster. Just my opinion.