Review: _My Dark Places:_ You want it darker? Here you go...

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I had heard of James Ellroy for years, but I had never read any of his novels before. Being a fan of noir, and true crime, I figured that it was about time, and when this book caught my eye on the Mt.TBR pile, well, it was time. I was shocked, enthralled, and very disturbed. My Dark Places explores Ellroy's troubled relationship with his mother, Jean Ellroy, and the murder that shattered his childhood. Told in first person, we discover that 'troubled' barely describes James Ellroy. As a child, he was a lazy troublemaker in school, and played by both parents against each other in an acrimonious divorce. James preferred his father, who let him be lazy and do nothing, and fed him a steady diet of abuse aimed at his mother. James loved spending the weekends with his dad. That all ended when James was ten. The body of his mother was found in a open field, half-naked and strangled. His entered the permanent custody of his father, who encouraged his deliquent behaviour and James happily spent his time cutting class, drinking and doing drugs with his buddies. A bit more darkly, James was developing an sexual obsession with violence, often starring his mother and sometimes girls from his school as emperiled maidens to be rescued from death and danger and would reward him with sex. By the time he was in his twenties, James was getting and losing jobs at the bottom on the payscale, sleeping on friend's sofas, and living on a steady diet of drugs and alcohol. It was pretty dire. And his obsession over his mother's death grew... How he transformed himself from the self-destruction, and managed to reach a tenuous peace with himself is what makes this book so fascinating. Do not think for an instant that this is full of new age philosophy on how to transform yourself into a bright and shiny human. Forget that. Ellroy not only embraces the dark, he uses it and his memories to fuel his writing. His style is brutal, sharp and staccato, like flying glass. The profanity and racist overtones are loud and brutal, and this is not a book for anyone who is sensitive over such expressions. At times it's not at all easy to read. And that is precisely why it is such a good read, if your tastes run that way. While this is the first book that I have read by James Ellroy, it certainly won't be my last. This is one that helped me to understand some of my own dark spots in my soul, it also helped me to understand why and how they got there, and that there are ways to live with them. Fans of true crime will enjoy this one, but again, I would exercise some caution. Ellroy is not at all blunt about what he says or shows in here. Enter with care. Four stars out of five overall. Recommended. My Dark Places: An L.A. Crime Memoir James Ellroy 1996; Vintage Books ISBN 0-679-78205-1