Extra Marital Relationship
By [eds]
@ZedSmart (19753)
Philippines
August 28, 2018 12:55am CST
OK, first of all it’s really none of my business but situation like this is very common. And I don’t want to directly judge people engaged on this situation. They maybe have their own reasons and in the first place, it’s impossible to believe that they didn’t know what they’re doing.
This happened when my colleague engaged in a relationship we call extra marital. They have both kids and the man has still co-habiting with his wife but the woman’s separated. When I heard this news from other colleague, I was not quick to believe because I haven’t notice any signs at all that they have that kind of relationships. It’s not my habit to keep an eye with the person’s personal activities. Maybe, I was the last person to know except for the bosses and their families. When the woman got pregnant, I was convinced that it was really true. And because their situation was no longer unknown to all people around the workplace, the woman resigned from her job after giving birth. It doesn’t end there because after a year of giving birth for their first child, she’d given birth again for their second child.
I thought of the man’s legal wife because this does not come to her knowledge; we presumed, otherwise there would be confrontations. I know the person but I don’t want to tell her also the acts of his husband and neither with the other people around us. I don’t want to meddle with the issue and I believe the every one of us feel the same. It’s their life and only time can tell for the man’s wife to discover.
8 people like this
13 responses
@infatuatedbby (95001)
• United States
28 Aug 18
That is a messy situation. Are you close friends of the man's wife, or just know of her? I would not want to be involved, but after 2 kids with that man and he has kids and a wife is so wrong. Seems like the man likes having two women...
That is not fair for either situation.
2 people like this
@ZedSmart (19753)
• Philippines
28 Aug 18
I've known the wife for a long time but will not considered close of friends. I think this is very unfair for her, the cheating. Maybe the guy really want to be in that situation.And now, he have this additional children to support with finances aside from his kids from the first family.
1 person likes this
@infatuatedbby (95001)
• United States
28 Aug 18
@ZedSmart Yes, definitely it is unfair for the wife that her signifiant other (husband) is cheating, as well as the other woman involved whom now has two children with this man.
However, like you mentioned - we do not know the background information of all sides. We do not know the relationship of the woman with her husband. We do not know about the woman who is separated. But I do think, they all need to be upfront about this situation. Kids are being involved, feelings are going to get hurt and its a big messy situation. :(
And it doesn't help knowing either!
1 person likes this
@ZedSmart (19753)
• Philippines
28 Aug 18
@infatuatedbby The situation got more complicated because of the children. The kids are innocent though. It's a question when they can keep this situation. In the first place, they knew the consequences.
1 person likes this
@yoalldudes (35040)
• Philippines
28 Aug 18
The consequences for the kids is what people have to be careful about.
1 person likes this
@yoalldudes (35040)
• Philippines
28 Aug 18
@ZedSmart A lot of millenials don't want marriage. I can't blame them lol.
1 person likes this
@ZedSmart (19753)
• Philippines
28 Aug 18
@yoalldudes I observed that too. Living in is becoming common.
@rsa101 (37968)
• Philippines
28 Aug 18
Oh boy looks like this two are serious enough that they continued even after the first child. I wonder what happened to the woman who you said have kids and how did the husband reacted to it. It is hard to really meddle on them since you are not involved or have any interest in that relationship.
1 person likes this
@rsa101 (37968)
• Philippines
28 Aug 18
@ZedSmart it takes two to Tango as they say. Both are willing partners to do the crime of passion. It is really pitiful for the wife but legally she has more rights so she can fight for that than the other girl. So in the end if the illicit relationship fails the other woman cannot ran after the guy and the legal wife does have more option she can pursue legally.
1 person likes this
@ZedSmart (19753)
• Philippines
28 Aug 18
The woman was no longer living with his man (I won't call it husband because I'm not sure if she's married with the guy) she had two kids with her previous relationship. She left the children with the grandma whose living in different place. She worked here and it's where she find this guy she have an affair and with 2 kids now. I felt pity for the legal wife.
1 person likes this
@anya12adwi (6037)
• India
28 Aug 18
but you should drop hinting her wife.. it is better for her to know about her man earlier..
1 person likes this
@anya12adwi (6037)
• India
30 Aug 18
@ZedSmart Oh.. It can be complicating thing at times.. and very complex too..
1 person likes this
@SIMPLYD (90722)
• Philippines
28 Aug 18
It is so sad, when this happens because usually it's the wife who is last to know.
It is also sad that no one will tell her except when one of her family - sister or brothers would get to know about it and tell her.
I too, wouldn't like to be the one who will tell a friend about it. It has to be a family member.
1 person likes this
@yugocean (9965)
• India
29 Aug 18
People call it extra martial relationship, I call it cheating their families.
If people cannot be truthful for their families, then they cannot be believed either.
Well some people will come up and say, this is none of your business.
I'll say, yes I have nothing to do with this, no sympathy either, if they want it, then take permission for this from their spouse.
@ridingbet (66857)
• Philippines
28 Aug 18
if the legal wife will know about this, it might be a problem for the man.
1 person likes this
@domiwla (398)
• Venezuela
28 Aug 18
In my opinion who should respect is the person who is committed to a relationship, if you know that you know another person and consider that it is your better half then put on your pants and leave your current partner and enter the divorce and thus avoid a bad time to your partner, and is more sinsero with himself, it is inevitable to meet people who attract us and maybe already have a partner but the respect is put by someone who has a family formed.
@ZedSmart (19753)
• Philippines
28 Aug 18
I don't know whose side is going to leave. If any of them want to patch things-up, the involved party could make a move and instead of keeping the current situation. If the guy would choose the latter to be his new family, he must talk to his wife honestly about the situation if he would want a separation. We'll never know how the other party reacts. It would be shocking and painful for her and won't give-up that easily. We can't just speak and say the we should end until here because there's someone new. The're plenty to put in consideration. Although, it's their life, they have their choices.
@domiwla (398)
• Venezuela
28 Aug 18
I think the wording of the subject under discussion is repeated several times
