To Leave Or Not To Leave

@Kandae11 (53698)
January 20, 2022 7:56am CST
You know that love has dried up, taken a hike. The union or relationship of six, ten, or twenty years is in deep trouble - yet you hang on. Is there a chance it could be fixed? Are you trying to fix it, or will you eventually just walk away?. If children are involved - what then? Is the relationship worth fighting for?,or is it best to get out?. What would you do?. What are some of the things that would make you want to stay or leave? Pixaby image.
10 people like this
10 responses
OceanTiara
@RebeccasFarm (86839)
• United States
20 Jan 22
I am not good at love..romantic I mean. So I end it very quickly and never look back or even have any communication.
2 people like this
OceanTiara
@RebeccasFarm (86839)
• United States
20 Jan 22
@Kandae11 I would say that is the truth yes. Of course I may have thought I was, but now looking back. it was nothing even close.
1 person likes this
OceanTiara
@RebeccasFarm (86839)
• United States
20 Jan 22
@Kandae11 On a second thought I may have been very close to being in love with the first one. Close, but it was not fruitful. Just a memory.
1 person likes this
Kandase
@Kandae11 (53698)
•
20 Jan 22
Does that mean that you have never really been in love?
1 person likes this
MARILYN
@Marilynda1225 (80018)
• United States
20 Jan 22
For myself I ended my 15 year marriage after hanging on to that relationship for longer than I should have. My children were young but it turned out to be the best decision for me.
2 people like this
MARILYN
@Marilynda1225 (80018)
• United States
21 Jan 22
@Kandae11 it's not good for children to grow up in a toxic environment.
1 person likes this
Kandase
@Kandae11 (53698)
•
20 Jan 22
Some say, they endure the relationship because of the children, but that environment cannot be good for a child.
1 person likes this
snowy
@snowy22315 (170699)
• United States
20 Jan 22
I guess it depends on the circumstances. No one answer is right for everyone.
2 people like this
Kandase
@Kandae11 (53698)
•
20 Jan 22
That's true.
1 person likes this
Anna
@LadyDuck (459555)
• Switzerland
20 Jan 22
I agree with @PhredWreck, staying only because of children is wrong. The decision if to stay or to go is personal. There are many reasons to evaluate. I would never stay if I had been cheated or abused, this is for sure.
1 person likes this
Kandase
@Kandae11 (53698)
•
20 Jan 22
Maybe if the cheating happened once-l may forgive but not forget. If it is physical abuse l am out of there fast.
2 people like this
Anna
@LadyDuck (459555)
• Switzerland
20 Jan 22
@Kandae11 I do not believe I could forgive cheating and I am sure I would not forget, so it would become a toxic relationship.
1 person likes this
Kandase
@Kandae11 (53698)
•
20 Jan 22
@LadyDuck You are so right. Going forward there will always be suspicion. He is out late - even if it is legitimate, you will wonder. Your peace of mind is gone.
1 person likes this
Valerie J. Routhieaux
@just4him (307540)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
20 Jan 22
My marriage ended after 21 years. It was unfixable.
2 people like this
Kandase
@Kandae11 (53698)
•
20 Jan 22
I would say mine was unfixable as well. He had a history of abusive behaviour which l did not know about, so l left pretty early.
1 person likes this
Mildred Tabitha
@mildredtabitha (16085)
• Nairobi, Kenya
20 Jan 22
It's better to leave with your children if a marriage counselor can't help
1 person likes this
Kandase
@Kandae11 (53698)
•
20 Jan 22
What happens if he doesn't want you to leave with the children?
1 person likes this
Kandase
@Kandae11 (53698)
•
20 Jan 22
@mildredtabitha. Yes it would have to be carefully planned.
1 person likes this
Mildred Tabitha
@mildredtabitha (16085)
• Nairobi, Kenya
20 Jan 22
@Kandae11 he doesn't need to find out you are leaving. It's a narrow escape
1 person likes this
ShannyBananny
@shaggin (71671)
• United States
21 Jan 22
I would try to work it out for my kids sake but there are times even that isn’t worth it like when you constantly fight around the kids or something it’s better to be single.
1 person likes this
Kandase
@Kandae11 (53698)
•
21 Jan 22
I agree.
1 person likes this
Nawsheen
@Nawsheen (28643)
• Mauritius
20 Jan 22
Sometimes if you are feeling stifled it's better to walk away as you are only harming yourself. If you are not happy, your children may eventually sense this and get affected too
1 person likes this
Kandase
@Kandae11 (53698)
•
20 Jan 22
Life is short. I would try my best to fix things but if it isn't possible l won't want to spend the rest of my life in misery.
Joanie
@Freelanzer (10744)
• Canada
7 Feb 22
It would depend if it is a problem that can be fixed or not.
1 person likes this
Kandase
@Kandae11 (53698)
•
7 Feb 22
True. Some problems are unfixable.
1 person likes this
Simone
@Janet357 (75656)
•
20 Jan 22
Marriage is sacred. I think you both need to talk about it. I am happily married so am thankful
1 person likes this
Kandase
@Kandae11 (53698)
•
20 Jan 22
When l hear about couples celebrating 10 , 12, 20, 40, years of marriage it gives me a warm feeling.
1 person likes this
Simone
@Janet357 (75656)
•
21 Jan 22
@Kandae11 true. it tells something about them.