Reasons NOT to have children

France
December 2, 2006 10:27am CST
Not everyone wants children, and I woudl also argue that in todays world where there are so many more people than te planet can properly support, its right that not everyone has kids. (I'm not saying its wrong to have kids, just that its not right for every last one of us) Have you considered this issue, and if you chose not to have children, what was the biggest reason? For me it was wanting to give a gift to the planet, if I don't have children then I linit the impact I have on the environment for thousands of years into the future.
10 people like this
133 responses
@ChewySpree (1832)
• United States
2 Dec 06
I agree that many people have children for (what i consider to be) the wrong reasons. I have known women who had children because their relationship was having issues. A child is just going to exacerbate the issues, not fix them. Usually those women end up raising the child along and struggling. I waited until I was 35 to marry my husband, and we're getting ready to have our first child (I'm 37 now). I'm glad we waited. I think we have more to offer a child now - we're more stable emotionally and financially than we were when we were younger.
3 people like this
• France
2 Dec 06
Absolutely right, you have had the chance to test your relationship and the reasons for wanting a child, and you know you will thoroughly enjoy the experience. Thank you for responding, and the best of luck with the new baby when it arrives :) PS Don't forget to plant a few trees on its behalf to offset the nappies and such like it will get through before it can make its own environmental decisions :)
2 people like this
• Canada
2 Dec 06
Yeah, people are naturally more stable when they're older. They have more experience in real life and in things like balancing their budget and owning their own house. A lot of marriges these days seem to be rushing into starting a family and having children. I'm not married yet, but when I do I'm not going to want children right away. I'll want to relax a little and learn more about what life really is like with all that responsibility. So thanks for letting everyone know about your situation. It's helped me really think about what's happening and what's at stake.
2 people like this
• India
2 Dec 06
a good thought but have you thought how many people think like you...... in india people still want more than 2 children and having no children is a mirrage..... i would suggest to have one child a family, what do you say?
3 people like this
• United States
2 Dec 06
What if someone has twins. You can't limit to 1 kid. All these problem people are having 5,6,7,8 children and someone like me who wants to raise my children right is only allowed to have 1. That's the problem already today the good people aren't having enough kids
1 person likes this
• India
2 Dec 06
a good thought but have you thought how many people think like you...... in india people still want more than 2 children and having no children is a mirrage..... i would suggest to have one child a family, what do you say?
3 people like this
• France
2 Dec 06
Once child would be a good step in a culture that still relies heavily on having children in most marriages. As long as people do that out of choice that would be good, I wouldnt like to see people forced to do that though. It must always be a concious decision
1 person likes this
@SharK07 (245)
• Romania
2 Dec 06
Child - child
Well there r many reasons but one of them is no extra problems and no spendings.But i don't think there is a person out there how hates children.
2 people like this
• France
2 Dec 06
I have met people who genuinely don't like kids, glad I'm not one of them though!
1 person likes this
@nicky35 (748)
2 Dec 06
i have three kids age 8,4 and 2,i wouldnt change it for the world but life is tough and i can completely understand anyone who decides not to bother.borrowing nephews is a good idea.i think people should do whatevers best for them because were gone in a blink,so if having kids or not having kids is the way to go its up to you.
1 person likes this
@nicky35 (748)
2 Dec 06
i know people who dont like kids
1 person likes this
• India
2 Dec 06
i dont agree with not having children at all coz if everyone decides that way then we won't have any, i repeat, ANY young blood in next 20-25 years as everyone would be old and dying. I know this is so hypothetical and the situation can never be that bad but it can be bad enough to affect the working of our planet. I wud go for a single child for a couple rather
• France
2 Dec 06
I agree tat there need to be some children, but too many people are having children young and without thinking it through properly, and often then they end up having 4 or 5 children but not having the skills to ensure that their environmental impact is minimised. Better for a good lot of us to choose to not reproduce and help make the world a better place for everyone.
1 person likes this
• United States
2 Dec 06
I have a link I'd like to share. I hope you don't mind. I think it's great and it tries to show the impact that overpopulation is having. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1-0vnRmej0Q
1 person likes this
• United States
3 Dec 06
But if a small percentage of the population decides to not have children, it's not going to affect the population growth. The world is overpopulated as it is, and within 60 years we're going to be severely lacking in resources if the birth rate continues. There are thousands upon thousands upon thousands of people still having children. And there are people in the world who shouldn't have children - I'm one of them. It's better to leave the child bearing and raising to the people who are prepared and ready for it and let the rest of us go along *not* ruining the lives of kids we might have.
• Romania
2 Dec 06
You do not want children because ypu don't want the plannet to suffer??!!I think I missunderstood, right?!
2 people like this
• France
2 Dec 06
Whats to misunderstand? We share this planet with billions of other lifeforms. I don't think we have the right to use up every last scrap of its resources. Look at any family tree to see how fast we increase. If I don't have kids then in 200 years time there are not dozens of my descendants making an even bigger impact than I am. It makes perfect sense that if you care for the planet the absolute best thing you can do for it is not add to the burden of population.
1 person likes this
• India
5 Dec 06
well i thnk having kids fullfills a women n to gve reasons n decide over it is stupid n is also fullfills a realtion
2 people like this
• France
6 Dec 06
But the worlds population is predicted to double in the next 50 years. I think its crowded now, can you imagine your home town with double the people? There is only one reasonable way to prevent thatm and tats to have fewer children overall. I don't think thats stupid at all!
1 person likes this
• India
5 Dec 06
I would not like to have children at all because I do not want to leave a copy of mine on this earth. The planet is beautiful but human beings arent. The human world is a dirty world full of crime and pollution, of hatred and of fear. My parents do not allow me to travel alone thinking am in danger of being in trouble. And the limitations have only increased. If you look at delhi- the city in which i live, i would never have children until and unless i can give them a beautiful future with the best of education and opportunities to live this life without hurting others or being hurth themselves. Not all people are tolerated here- dark coloured ones, poor, helpless, homosexuals, women....a bundle of powerlessness sweeps the society and discrimination is aghast. I have taken years to come term with myself. I would never give this world my children. I will live and complete myself with this world.
• France
6 Dec 06
thats a very philosophical answer
1 person likes this
• Malaysia
5 Dec 06
You have your choice to choose not to have children, nothing wrong with it. But for myself I love to have 2 children and I’m pregnant now. I think certain country didn’t educate their people well enough on family planning which creates an unequal distribution of human being in the world. If everyone in the world decided not to have children, there would not be anymore young generation in the future, imaging the impact it will give to the world. That why, I think having one or two children will be the ideal way.
@MsBatt (10)
• United States
5 Dec 06
I knew from an early age that I did NOT want children. I've never particularly liked children, even when I was one myself. And I sort of felt that my not having children might in some small way make up for those people who have too many.
• India
2 Dec 06
A good thought friend..But juz imagine what if ur parents had thought the same.U wont be here right now starting this discussion in myLot..
• United States
2 Dec 06
Heh... You know, that argument doesn't work with everyone. There are days (most days) I wish my mother didn't give birth to me and I tend to resent her for that. Which is yet another reason why I don't want kids. Wouldn't want any of my children resenting or hating me because I gave birth to them.
1 person likes this
• France
2 Dec 06
Intersting argument! I'm very glad my parents did have me, but if they hadnt then I wouldnt be here to know any different, so I don't think those yet unconceived have any say in the matter really. We, as adults, have to choose what seems to be the right course of action for our own individual lives and how we view our palce in the world. We won't all agree of course, but thats part of being human.
@funfreak2k2 (1740)
• India
2 Dec 06
so u dont want to have children for sake of other humans and the planet ? boy this planet is made for us to live in. not to let it desolate ! dont u have faith in God's strength? He will give what is needed for the entity of the whole planet. there were epidemics in history but the world has come upto u coz people had children even they lost others in the family. what if ur parents thought like u? wud u been in this world?
• France
2 Dec 06
I'm not saying nobody should have children, but look at a population graph. We cannot keep going teh way we are and not have some major disaster happen. There are just too many of us on the planet, in my opionion, to enable the species to survive if we continue to reproduce at our current rate.
• India
3 Dec 06
for that i think its enough if u restrict the no. of children u have. let population grow, so the resources shall, by His grace.
@hm1177 (1223)
2 Dec 06
i personally wanted to have children because its the most natural thing in the world. Our bodies were made to procreate and i wouldn't want someone telling me not to have kids because the environment will be harmed. Kids don't harm the environment. People abusing it by using aerosols and producing pollution harm the environment. People driving round in large cars and choosing not to walk or cycle or use public transport wherever possible. That is something we can teach future generations and they can learn from OUR mistakes.
1 person likes this
• France
2 Dec 06
That is true, but can you guarentee you will bring your children up without the things you mention? Do you avoid them yourself?
• United States
5 Dec 06
That is a great point. Maybe we should ban SUVs and other things which pollute and make the world less beautiful.
• India
2 Dec 06
because thy are troublesome to be brought up and it is an extra responsibility on ur head.
• France
2 Dec 06
Thats one way of looking at it, true. I think children can be a great joy and of course they are the future of our species as well, but I don't think I'd choose having an easy life as a reason not to have them. For me its definately to offset my own presence here. However, I respect your perspective, thank you for responding.
1 person likes this
• United States
3 Dec 06
I think that it is a choice that you have to take seriously and maybe each person has their own reasons to have or not have children. On another note, I believe that my children are contributing to the wellness of the planet and have the potential to help in the future. It is a responsibility though, once you have them, to raise them with some good guidance
1 person likes this
@imadriscoll (2230)
• United States
5 Dec 06
My husband and I would love to have a big family. We love children and the three that we already have, have blessed us richly. They bring us great joy and bring out the very best in us. We would actually like to double up!! To accomplish this though we have decided that the next three children that we add to our family should come through means of adoption. This really doesn't have a lot to do with not wanting to populate the earth as much as it has to do with us desiring to give children a loving home. I might suggest to others who are concerned with the environment, but still have a heart for children to consider adoption as an option for their family. You solve two problems ... you give a child who needs a home, a home and you still maintain the current population of the earth!
1 person likes this
• France
5 Dec 06
thats sound reasoning
@pravibabu (135)
• India
3 Dec 06
IT IS THE NATURES TENDENCY THAT - ONE GETS BIRTH, LIVES, GIVE BIRTH TO OTHER, DIE AT THE END - IT IS ALL THE CYCLE. YOU BORN, OK , CREATE YOUR REPRESENTATIVES (LIMITED), MAKE THEM GEMS. THATS ALL. GO AHEAD.
• France
4 Dec 06
but we also have free will and can make choices about our own lives and legacy, we are not blind unthinking baby machines
@DeenaD (2688)
• United States
3 Dec 06
I definitely think you should NOT have children. Not everyone is cut out for it, and if you're sure you won't like parenting, then definitely don't have children. Be aware, however, that all your life you will depend on other people's children. Other people's children will prescribe your medication, fix your leaky pipes, collect your garbage, and pay for your social security benefits. And if you are a woman, one day you may well be asking young men in your family (nephews and nieces' husbands and their children) to come to your house to fix your air-conditioner, and move heavy things, and take a look at your car which is broken, and wait in the emergency room for you and talk to the doctor afterwards. I am saying this because the elderly childless women in my family are always asking my husband and myself for these kinds of favors. I happen to love babies. I have four children and I wish I had one more, but we'll see...
• France
4 Dec 06
thats a good point about relying on the next generation, I wouldnt deny the truth of that
@ewriterz (20)
• India
3 Dec 06
Reasons NOT to have children? Gawd! You sound really fed up with life. God gives em to you, you do nothing but take care of them for him. Yesterday is past, tomorrow is uncertain, TODAY is a GIFT from GOD that is why we call it the PRESENT!!! Smile and Have em....in small doses.
• France
3 Dec 06
I'm not in the slightest bit fed up with life! Its because I believe life is precious and should be treasured that I think that cautious planning for the right number of humans is the way forward. I'm not at all against children, but I want all children to have the best chance in life, not be struggling for a share of resources that no longer stretch as fas as they once did. I want all children to know what a true forest looks like, to know that there are fish in the sea and fuel for our industries, if we grow at the rate we are, that won't happen. Life on this planet is wonderful, I want it to continue to be wonderful for future generations.
@yorb24 (2181)
• United States
3 Dec 06
I choose at this moment not to have children. If or when I get married and my husband prefers that, then I will do it. I want to have as much life experience as possible so I can pass on all the qualities they will need to be a productive adult and I'm not quite there yet.
• France
3 Dec 06
That sounds like a very reasoned choice, I hope it all works out just as you hope.
@cheongyc (5075)
• Malaysia
3 Dec 06
I am a dark-green enviromentalist, so i would encourage that people not to have too many kids. According to the formula of multiplication, having just 1 kid will cut half the world's population (like what had been enforced in China). Having 2 kid is just nice, (to maintain the population count) but if having more than 2 will giving us the over populated crisis (we are facing nowadays) when every new baby is born, what come together is an increase of many tons of rubbish, higher food consumption rate, worsen green house effect (consumre more oxygen). But it's still our right to have kids, and it's human instinct to ensure the continuaty of his own blood line. But in order to be environmental friendly, just not to have more than 2 kids. :)
• France
3 Dec 06
well said!