Life or something like it...

Canada
January 29, 2007 11:17pm CST
Ok. I had 3 children with a man and I left him in 2001. Okay. Ever since that point he's threatened to kill me several times, over crazy petty things. And this last time took the cake, the one the police needed to finally charge him. He has a first appearance date in court in February. My thoughts are all over the place right now. I am not the one charging him, the Crown Counsil is. If he goes to jail it is not me putting him there. At one side of this I want him to fully understand (which I know he won't, because as i've found out over the years he has many different deficits which he's passed on to atleast one of our children together) that he cannot go around threatening to kill me or kill his ex wife. He never apologizes. When someone catches him on it, all he says was "she made me angry" . ITs always my fault the reason why he threatens to kill me. I have never ever seen him lay his hands on anyone, but recently he has beaten up a woman in a Money Mart for punching my son in the face. So I know he has it in him to hurt someone, and badly. What bothers me about this whole thing, is people expect me to be happy. Why should I be happy about this? I don't get it. Thoughts?
1 response
@patgalca (14309)
• Orangeville, Ontario
30 Jan 07
I kinda sorta had the same thing happen to me. My EX beat me up, and threatened to kill me in the process ("If I had a bullet I'd kill you!"). A week later he took off. The police showed up at my door shortly after that looking for him because of a complaint the neighbour's made. When I said I didn't know when he would be back they immediately pegged me for an abused spouse and asked me if he ever hit me. The whole story came tumbling out. They asked me if I wanted to press charges. I said I was unsure. They said that they could still press charges with what I told them. I agreed to press charges and go to the hospital and have myself examined. They asked if I would take him back. I said only if he got counselling. I found out where he was (in a different province) and phoned him. I told him not to come back or he would be going to jail. Washed my hands of him. I would have preferred he go to jail than hide out in a difference province, but he is out of my life and we didn't have kids and there was no court case to deal with. I felt guilty for pressing charges for a little bit, but eventually I got over it because I knew I was not the one who was wrong. He was the one with the problem, not me.