If you help someone do you expect anything from them in return?
January 30, 2007 10:23pm CST
If I help someone mainly it is because I think it is good to be helpful rather than not. I'm not after anything from them in return. However, I must admit I do feel a little bit miffed if they don't have the courtesy to say thank you.
• United States
31 Jan 07
I never expect anything in return. I have helped a lot of people in my time, and it makes me feel good to do it. I guess the reason I do not expect anything from anybody, is I do not like to get let down or disappointed. I have live with enough of that in my lifetime too. I had a friend that I helped constantly, I babysat her two boys for years, for free. She was a single mom and she worked two jobs sometimes to pay her bills. I have made her house payment once, I have paid her electricity bill a few times, I have let her use my shower when they did not have hot water, I have cleaned her house many times, etc. Over the past 15 years, I have helped her in many different ways. When I needed help with moving, she always had a reason why she couldn't be there. Since I moved, I have only talked to her twice. She does not have a phone, and I have no way to get in touch with her. I have had the same phone number for quite a long time, and she has yet to call me. It has been about 8 months since I moved. It really hurts me, knowing that I made so many sacrifices for her, and I feel like she does not want to be my friend now because I live 80 miles away. I guess I am too far away to be of any help to her. Oh, wait, she used me as a reference to buy furniture, because about 3 weeks ago, Rent-a-Center called me wanting me to tell her she needed to pay or they were coming to get her stuff. Oh, well, I guess she showed what kind of friend she was, and I learned that I am a sucker. LOL. Anyway, thank you for all you do, there are people who will take advantage of the fact that you are so helpful, but the real reason we help people are for the few who really appreciate it and how it makes us feel inside.
31 Jan 07
I have this habit of helping one for the first time, and then when he seeks help to me again, I expect something in return already. Not that I like any payment or what, but I expect them to help me too when I help them now. I don't tell them directly though, I just use my "offered help" to them as some sort of blackmail if they don't want to help me. Is that bad?