Need Advice please about my mother and my son

As you said, your mother has let him get away with anything. After a great period of that, children think they can get anything they want and when they don't they lash out. It sounds like a harsher discipline needs to be implemented. It is important that your mother also assist in implementing the same discipline or this kind of behavior will continue. For example, I have a daughter who is now 5 years old. She started acting up the same way. My mother was saddened but she would not follow the rules I set forth and therefore in my daughter's mind she could do what she liked and get away with it. Well, I talked with my mother and father both about some changes that were going to be made or they would not see Katy again. I made sure my daughter was present so she could here the consequences. When my daughter or my mother tried to test me, I implemented my punishments. I informed my parents, in front of my daughter, that they had permission to punish her as they saw fit. That really got her attention. So much that they only had to severely punish her once (they gave her a 30 minute time out). Since then she has her moments but they are slowly dwindling. It does take patience but it also takes strength. It is tough to love and implement tough love. But which do you think your child would rather have? Do they want a family that punishes them to make them a better person in life or do they want a parent that ignores them and lets them get away with anything therefore stunting there growth as a good person? Your child is not going to stop loving you if you instill discipline. They may say it but it is only the heat of the moment. They still love you.

my little brother he calls me mommy was acting up on my mother when he was that age I told him to stand in the corner with is hand held out and repeat I must have respect to my mother he slipped up every now and then and I punish him I tell my mother not to sit quietly as I did not get away with that see I am not in to the whole spanking kids but I do like to talk to them and every now and then punish them take away some toy or something so that they understand that they are children not adults and should have respect as respect is being showed to them

Well he needs to understand as that is terrible and you certainly have to nip it in the Butt before he gets worse towards your Mum. It is really sad and I wonder what has turned him like that. I know I would take away privileges from him till he learns to be nice and not rude. Now it is your Mum but who is it going to be next, he might turn on you to eventually or even your Partner

Well, first off, I would talk to him, ask him why he responded to her like that? is there something she said/did that made him angry/upset. Then explain to him that even when he is upset, he has no right to talk to her that way, and that if he continues there will be consequences. HOw old is your son by the way? When he is rude, instill consequences and be consitent. Take away privelages, t.v. time, internet times, something that will surely affect his behavior and attitude. Good luck. If he is a pre-teen alot of it could have to do with puberty, raging hormones in anyone usually causes bad moods and mood swings.

what I think is that treat him with patience and have faith in him and keep on telling him how much everyone loves him

I think your response to the situation depends on your son's age. You definately have to nip it in the bud before he gets the subconsious message that it is ok, which I kind of think your mom may be sending him. I think you have to talk to both your child and your mom. She is not setting boundries with him and so he is not respecting her. If she is willing to avoid coming around because of a child's behavior, then the child has the upper hand, not the adult.

Sometimes grandparents pamper a child to such an extent that he/she loses respect for them. But as his mother I think you should talk to your son and find out what made him so angry and shouting at his grandmom. Be strict in that matter.