does anyone in a long term relationship miss dating?

@smithy86 (137)
March 19, 2007 6:22am CST
I love my girlfriend very much and we are together a year next week. And although i would never trade for where i am now i really miss the fun we had when we were dating and we would get dressed up and meet up and have dinner being suprised by what each other was wearing. As two females we tend to dress total opposites so we each try a different style etc... I do miss that. Does anyone else? My friend has just started a new relationship and they are going to little places together like the zoo or the aquarium and they are finding it all romantic.
8 people like this
33 responses
@quatelmon (955)
• United States
19 Mar 07
I've been with my boyfriend for 5 years. What you have to do is stir up the romance yourself!!! Why not surprise her and take her to cute little places, or bring her flowers for no reason (other than you love her!) There are tons of things you can do to bring back the romance. And, if you are already feeling bored after only a year, maybe she is not the right one for you. As long as you stay loyal to her while you are in the relationship and you do not act upon it, those feelings are perfectly natural. Just try to do things to bring back feelings like when you first started dating.
1 person likes this
@smithy86 (137)
19 Mar 07
no im not bored at all, i simply miss the learning about each other and the dinners by candlelight and the butterflies that are still slightly there after a fifth date
• United States
19 Mar 07
I used to, now we set every Saturday night aside as 'date' night. We get dressed up, either go out someplace with friends or prepare a special meal at home. Rule #1 is that we can't discuss anything to do with the house, the bills etc. the conversation has to be centered around our relationship, our plans, etc. Its worked very well for us.
• Andorra
19 Mar 07
I have found that too. I have found that my partner and i dont really make the effort to look nice for each other as often as we used to because we are just so comfortable with each other. My girlfriend is very feminine and wears make up most days and she always looks nice but every now and then she puts that little bit more effort in and she just takes my breath away and i cant stop staring at her
1 person likes this
@listen2me (511)
• United States
19 Mar 07
i try to go somewhere different with my gf at least once a week. we've almost ran out of places to go but we try to not have to miss dating.
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@winkerf (44)
• Philippines
19 Mar 07
hmm. what i know is that DATING doesn't stop even when you already are into an intimate relationship. ...you can tell your partner to "bring back the old days," and i am sure that your partner misses that, too. the difference in having the relationship is commitment, but the way you're going out doesn't have to change in any way. do what makes you happy. do what makes you both happy.
• China
20 Mar 07
Yes, I miss the romantic of dating very much. But I do enjoy the terrific feeling eveytime I saw him after hours of being apart. The problem is that, the feeling won't last long because we are troubled with the mass of life.
20 Mar 07
YES! My guy and I have been together over six years now. What a bore! I miss the not living together, the anticipation of when we'd see each other next, the cutesie phone calls and visits at work. Now it's just boredom with things and fighting over bills. But, I guess it's part of growing up, right?
@langhua (501)
• China
20 Mar 07
oh i thought it is no matter what you dress
• United States
20 Mar 07
Why don't you take your girlfriend out on a date. Just because you have been together for a year doesn't mean you have to stop dating. You can pick a Friday, meet after work and go out on a date. Or pick a Saturday afternoon for an outing to the zoo or a museuem. It could be fun.It could be a great way to reconnect after a hectic week. Call a baby sitter on a wednesday night, if you need one, and go see a movie.Have fun.
@Gemmygirl1 (2870)
• Australia
20 Mar 07
I remember back when my boyfriend & i were at our 1 year anniversary (keep in mind it's was almost 8 years ago now) - we were still in the dating part :) We'd go to the football (Aussie Rules), drive in, out to dinner, i'd watch him skate etc. I agree it was definitely fun - it's not quite as fun now that we're almost 9 years together but things are still good - we have our time, we welcomed a new addition to our little family & everything is great for us! Have you though about maybe getting away for a romantic weekend? Maybe go to some cute little country style hotel, with some fun things you can do together, buy new clothes for the trip & have it all set up like an anniversary. Put rose petals on the bed & in the bath, have candle light dinners, that could bring some of the dating scene back!
@NatureBoy (493)
• Singapore
20 Mar 07
I think people always say that everyday is valentines when you are with the right person. But seriously, after a long period of time, there are not as many romantic nights, not as many surprises anymore. Cos of the getting used to and also the lack of time to plan anything. Hardly ever apart for more then a few hours a day.
@tatzkie (644)
• Philippines
20 Mar 07
well.. as for me.. we are running 3 years this april. and we treat each day as a date. so i doesnt really miss dating.
@onlyu2008 (172)
• China
20 Mar 07
I think dating is so exciting and interesting and I seldom miss dating.
@myklaire (437)
• Philippines
20 Mar 07
I am married now with kids. My hubby and I always find time regularly for dating. We mean going out just two of us, forgetting for a moment about obligations. This is how we relaxed and unwind. But on sundays, we make sure that it is for the whole family.
@Perry2007 (2229)
• Philippines
20 Mar 07
yes, sometimes having time alone together in dates will give you a chance to earn more memorable moments and of course tighten the bonding together. In long term relationship, specially when both of you are in differrent place you will miss dating.
• United States
20 Mar 07
No way!! I am so glad it's over. Maybe I will feel differently in another 10 years, but for now, not a bit. You could still take your girlfriend to the zoo and have fun. You guys could try something new, like call eachother up during work and see if you two could meet up for dinner or take a walk. I always got goosebumps when my husband asked me out after being in a routine for so long.
• United States
20 Mar 07
No, I don't miss dating as I am in two long term relationships, a wife of 26 years and the Lord Jesus Christ for eternity. I don't miss dating at all. consider Christ and really live, countdown21.com
• United States
19 Mar 07
All new relationships are more exciting then after couples are together for awhile, it's natural. That is why couples need to have a lot in common, and be able to communicate well. Also, never take eachother for granted, and always continue with the surprise gifts, and spur of the moment places to go too. Good luck sugar.
• United States
19 Mar 07
Personally, I do NOT miss dating or the single life one bit! My husband and I have been married 16 years in June (June 1st to be exact) and I wouldn't trade the occasional ho-hum / boring / routine day for the non-stop roller coaster of dating for any amount of money! Sure, I enjoyed meeting new people, going to new places, and doing new things. And even though I am nowhere near a 'homebody' I didn't enjoy all the coming and going and activity all of the time. Should I want to spend a weekend with a good book or puttering around the house - no one is disappointed over a missed event or worse yet MAD at my choice. I hope to never to return to the ups and downs of dating! That constant head conversation . . . Am I talking too much . . . I wonder if he would like to join me for supper . . . will he get along with my friends . . . his friends are idiots . . . why did he say/do that . . . why hasn't he returned my call . . . he seems like a nice guy but (insert anything) drives me nuts . . . and on and on. I love the settled in comfort of our relationship. I love the fact that my carefree, spontaneous, somewhat disorganized approach to life and living has had a positive effect on my oft worried, overly stressed, analytical husband. And I am thankful that my personality has become more responsible, thoughtful, and careful by having him in my life for the last 16+ years. Yep, uh huh, give me the married life anyday!
• United States
19 Mar 07
Yes, I know exactly what you are talking about. The little butterflies in your stomach, and the pleasure of just holding hands with each other. Whispering each other secrets to each other. It is the discovery of each other. It is great and exciting and there is nothing like it in the world! The discovery of love, youthful and new. Unfortunately I have never found how to keep that feeling around all the time, and I do miss it most of the time. Sometimes my husband can surprise me and get those butterflies stirring again, by surprising me with a hug or a little kiss on the back of my neck out of no where. If I could bottle up that feeling and take it with me always, I would probably be the happiest woman in the world! Same goes for two females, same principles. Sometimes we just have to look for the smallest little pleasures in our long lasting relationships and take the most pleasure from them instead of pining over "our first days" with our loved ones, lest we lose them forever.