How to deal with my mother in law

Well If i cannot get along i would just ignore the person, sometimes it is difficult, I have very weird sister in law, all that i have seen of her is evil and ugly, and i no matter how much i try to tolerate her its no possible with her nature, so i just totally ignore her

Goodness me I am blessed! My mother in law is one of my best friends - in fact she was my matron of honor! If your husband really won't move out and insists on the two of you living there, you're in a bit of an awkward spot. It's hard to live in someone else's house. Perhaps I'm somewhat ignorant of other cultures, but as much as I love my MIL, there's NO WAY I could live with them in the beginning part of marriage. There's enough pressures on marriage without adding more, and I'm far too much of a private person.

Well nobody needs to stand her but you. Don't bring in the whole world into your own world of interpretations. Just keep your world to yourself & think again. Things will surely look different to you. It's not the other person but YOU who needs to understand what the other person wants. I am not taking any side here but your's alone. Try this out & then see how life takes a turn to the better. You know giving in is a virtue only the great have? All the best.

It's very seldom that a mother-in-law and a daughter-in-law get along well. You are living in her house and you have to play by her rules. She has her own way of doing things around the house and you must respect the way that it's been before you came into the picture. She treats you as a stranger and you are under a magnifying glass, so to speak. So she questions every move you make and makes a big deal out of your minor and petty mistakes. And as for the part of her getting between you and your husband, it's very likely to happen since you all live in one roof. He is still her son after all and your marriage doesn't stop her from doing her motherly duties. I really suggest and advise my friends to live separately and get their own house or apartment no matter how small it is. Try to convince your husband to get your own place where you can move freely and comfortably without anyone meddling into the smallest details and actions you make. You will notice that you will have a better relationship with your mother-in-law. Living together makes you realize each other's habits or mistakes that causes friction in the relationship. You can solve that by doing what a married couple should do, and that is to get a place separate from your respective families and live life in your own terms.

Let's face it, your mother in law will not change - this is the way she deals with things. If you are really fed up and your husband won't listen, then perhaps it is time for you to take steps to change your own life - without him. If you don't have a job - get one! Make your own money and find your own place...see if husband wants to stay with his mommy or with you!

I used to live with my inlaws as well. I was lucky that 90percent of the time we got along well, but sometimes hearing them was like nails on a chalkboard, everything they did or said got on my nerves. There are 2 pieces of advice I will give you. 1- start saving some money, so that you and your husband can get out on your own, 2- Always be polite, while staying true to yourself. If she is fussing about the way you do laundry, it might help if you tell her that is the way, you do laundry, and even though it is not her way, the laundry is still getting done, and you would be more than happy to do her laundry at the same time, just to help her out, she can hardly fuss, when you are doing something to help her out at the same time. Hope this helps., that was just one example, but you get the idea. try it, even ask her advice about housework, from time to time, some people just need that extra ego boost to be happy, she may be one of them. Good luck sweetie!

same here baby!!! all men are momma's boys (we bring them up like that, specially indian mothers)...so don't complain. what does you sis-in-law do? you can follow her. how long have you been married? i've been married for 10 yrs and since my bro-in-law is not married yet, i'm the only woman of my age group in the family. my mom-in-law is from the districts and inspite of living in Cal for 35yrs, she hasn't changed a bit. her outdated notions drive me up the wall. we have had legendary tiffs over anything and everything. i can't change anything in the house without her returning it to the same place again. only my room is my own domain, otherwise i'm like a guest in that house. i'd seriously advise you to be patient then maybe after 10/15yrs, your husband will feel like having his own establishment. you will have to tolerate till then, if nothing else can be done. you can also think of taking up a job, if its possible.

I can relate to how you feel. I've got my mother in law living in my house too. She drives me crazy as well. You may not be able to do anything unless you move out. It may be the only way to get away from it.

It's really not right in the first place to live with your parents or his parents. There's nothing you should do but just treat them nice and try to please them. I really couldn't suggest anything that will make your mother in law like you more because just like what you said nobody can stand her. But I strongly suggest that you find your own place and that doesn't mean being disrespectful because that's the right thing to do for what I know.

I guess the best solution for you to do is to go separate ways with your extended family. Living with in-laws is definitely a difficult situation especially if you are newly weds. It is ideal that you learn to be independent from them the soonest possible time because you will never learn how to manage a home unless you live separately. As to your mother-in-law, I guess you could not change her ways since that is what she is and you'll have to learn to adjust to her since that is your family now.

two women and two sords cannot share the same house! the solution is not running away! find your own spaces where you can work alone. compartmentalize the workload and take turns so that nobody complains! see it from your husbands point of view! he cannot leave his parents for his wife. in our tradition he has to cope up with both! try ramdev maharaj pranayam excercises- that really calms your mind. divert your energies away from quarrels. i know it is easier said than done! but it will save a joint family.

i can understand how you feel because i lived with my mother-in-law for two years. i think you have two ways to the present situation. the first way is to have a talk with your hubby and tell him if you don't live separately, there may be trouble between you and him. it is true. with your mother-in-law's continuous negative remarks on you, your hubby may change his attitude towards you. i have such experience. the second way is to accept the situation if your hubby doesn't agree to move out. don't argue with her and try to obey her. pour out your complaints only before your hubby. such kind of life will be hard for you.

In our culture that is India,this is common.After marriage the son is not ready to leave the parents .Well, they are Momma's boy & my Husband too is like that.But since my Mother in law is really a great person this doe not bother me.i think you have to live like that.Accept the situation & try to make your husband understand.Sometimes it happens,mother comes in between husband & wife .Actually mothers are very much possessive about there sons.don't argue or fight with her.That will only increase the tensions.

do not irritate. every thing will be ok. have patiance. try to solve ur problems with ur mother in law and asked her why she is doing so? if doesn't work, if u love ur hubby then try to adjust with her. take care bye

Have you tried talking to your husband and explaining you wish to speak with his mom about this. You and him together need to approchae her. You need to show her that you are united in this. Expain that you are a grown women and the wife of her son and you don't appreciate getting questioned on the things you do. But in the end the thing may come down to you talking to your husband about the possibility of moving somewhere else.

Oh boy that is a tuff one. Is their any chance of getting your own place any time soon? The only other thing I can think of is to kill her with kindness. And you married her son not her! You do not have to obey her. Sheesh. She really sounds like bad news I would talk to your hubby about this as well. He needs to stick up for you too!