The ideal age gap between kids?
By nageswari75
@nageswari75 (675)
April 26, 2007 11:39am CST
What do you think should be the ideal age gap between kids?I have two sisters and we are about 2 yrs apart each.I though I would do the same with regard to having kids myself.But now my daughter is 3 and I still cannot muster enough courage to have the second kid.It is actually not so much a question of courage than physical energy to deal with another pregnancy and bringing up another kid through the first two years.The experience with my first one has been very tough,so I just keep postponing it.But I know I have to do it someday,as I have always wanted two kids .can you give me any words of encouragement from your experiences?I am thinking hard because I am already 32 now and don't want to put it off any longer.But I find that me and hubby are never on the same plane with regard to the second one.Whenever I broach the subject,he is hesitant and whenever he does,I start having second thoughts.How do I deal with this?Have any of you had kids wide apart,say more than 4 yrs?What has been your experiences?Do the kids get on well?What extent of sibling rivalry exists if the older child is 4 or more?Please share friends,I really look forward to your responses.
1 person likes this
5 responses
@wachit14 (3595)
• United States
27 Apr 07
My brother and I are six years apart and that's too many years. It's like he was in another generation. I was eleven when he moved out of the house and we were never close...not then, not now. My kids are almost three years apart and they get along great and are very good friends. For me it was the perfect age spread and a lot less work than I would have imagined.
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@snoopy04 (718)
• United States
27 Apr 07
My brother and I were tens years apart and we hardly ever speak to each other now. He has his family and I have mine but we just dont connect with each other any more.
I have four kids ages 9,4,3,2. I have two boys and two girls.
Its hard on me since my toddlers are so close in age and each one wants mommy all to herself. My nine year old daughter has had trouble adjusting because she had been a only child for five years and within 3 years she had two brothers and a sister. For me its 2 years apart but I know all my kids have a special bond no matter what the age differance.
@rapolu_cs (1184)
• India
26 Apr 07
Me and my brother has only 1yr gap and we always share our ideas as friends and we are very friendly to each other all the time even today and my marriage will not matter our relation and one of my friend and her sis are born with agap of 2yrs and they even maintain a good relations even after their marriages and even iam planning to have my next kid with a gap of 2yrs from my 1st,so i think the lesser the gap will bond strong relations.
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@soccermom (3198)
• United States
26 Apr 07
My sister and I are 7 years apart, and we are not close at all. My hubbby has 16 years difference between him and his sister, and he is more of a father figure to her than a brother. Ther is almost 7 years between my oldest and middle child, they love each other, but they are on different pages as far as interrests and development goes, so I doubt they will be that close. However there is only 3 years between my middle and youngest child and they can't breathe unless the other one is right by their side. It's nice to see them so close, although on occassion it makes my oldest feel like the odd man out.
@serenidity (641)
• India
26 Apr 07
Me and and my sister are 6 years apart and as kids we couldn't stand each other, things are different now, as grown ups and married we can't do without each other. I personally feel, a 3 to 4 year gap is right as it gives enough time for the mother to recover and for the first child also to get enough attention in the first 2 years which is very necessary. It also means you will be less tired with the second child as your first child is a little independent.
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