I feel useless as a person, now that my kids have gotten older

One reason why I am hesitant of giving up my job is the fear of feeling useless. I know I'd feel empty and useless once I stay home. My kids need me, but I know that as they grow up, they will need me less physically, and I'd be left at home. We need a life, too. And I am vulnerable to depression, so I always tell my husband that it won't do me good if I don't have a day job in an office. As for you, I think it would be best if you find something that interests you that will fill your spare time when your kids aren't around - it may be taking aerobics classes, cooking, or you may find a regular job. Activities will help you set aside your worries and thus, minimizing your depression. Feeling helpless and doing nothing won't help. And it won't help with your depression. Find something that will take your valuable spare time.

It's normal to feel that way because kids who have grown up into teens and young adults tend to less likely "need" their parents especially in the physical sense. However, this doesnt mean that you are not important already or that your role has ended because however old they become, they will still get to "need" you emotionally or mentally. If there may come a time that one of them experience something really bad or something they feel that they cant handle, im sure that you will be the one they turn to. Plus, your kids may not need you constantly anymore but you should not feel useless but instead be proud of what your children have become to be because of you.

Well heres another at to look at it and this is my opinion, as a neutral independent person.

You are a woman who has accomplished a great deal, you are obviously a devoted, caring and loving mother, who has gave birth and raised 4 children, no mean feat giving how much trouble my mother has with us two;)

Im sorry your feeling depressed, but, if its feeling "needed" or wanted, your children will always still need their mother, regardless of how old they are.

Why not seeing as you seem to have a little more free time, start socialising? Find a hobby or expand on a exisitng one, have a coffee or lunch with other mothers. Join a gym, that would be great, it'll help release endorphines, boost your confidence, and also help you meet people. Oh and light exercise is great for depression!

I'll say a prayer for you.:)

How dare you sit there and say how useless you are, why, do you realize how important you are to the rest of us? We need you to babysit our kids, to help in bake sales, to smile at us at yard sales, to help our elderly, to donate your time to teach us motherly things so we can teach our children, to make us laugh when you tell us jokes, we need you to keep watering those beautiful flowers we see as we drive by your house, to smile at us at the local checkout, to donate your old clothing so the homeless can feel proud, why, just think how wonderful your life will be when you get hugs from your kids and eventually hold your first grandchild, USELESS??? No one is useless! Always remember this: Just your smile, can make someone elses life happier!