Do you think that being sincere all the times could be an excuse to be mean?
By Alnitak
@Alnitak (423)
Italy
May 15, 2008 6:36pm CST
I've thinked about it many times.
Sometimes there are people that are saying that they ALWAYS say the truth and that if they're saying something mean it's because they're being sincere and people should appreciate it otherwise he should be considere an hypocrite.
I think that this could be true only if this kind of thing happens between friends, but if 2 persons don't know each other very well and one starts saying the other one he doesn't like him for this or that reason without thinking he could be hurted he's doing it because, since he doesn't like him, maybe he can be happy to see the other guy hurted.
In this case IMHO the best option should be indifference.
Do you agree, or do you think we should always say everything we are thinking, no matter if maybe we are hurting someone we don't know very well?
3 people like this
5 responses
@wooitsmolly (3613)
• United States
16 May 08
I know some people like that. Sometimes I can appreciate the honesty, but at other times I find it inappropriate. My friend will say within seconds of meeting a person that she thinks they are ugly or weird... things like that. She has said in the past that "people think it's cute" that she is so blunt, but really a lot of people dislike her because of it. I become afraid to introduce her to new people because she is so mean sometimes... but she is my friend and I have grown used to it myself. When she says negative things to me I just take them with a grain of salt and move on. She has a lot of insecurities and I think a lot of how she acts stems from that.
@Alnitak (423)
• Italy
16 May 08
This is a good example. Yesterday I was listening to a radio speaker I really agree because she always says things that make me think, and she was saying that today we try too much to separate rationality from our feelings and we should better learn to make them work at the same time.
So, in this case, if we are too spontaneous and just keep saying whatever we think, we're not listening to our reasonable part that maybe would suggest us to shut up :D
On the contrary, if we always think too much before talking too much by euphemisms we could end up lying... so it's not easy to find the right way but I think it stays in the middle like for many things ;)
@zhpshql (693)
• China
16 May 08
Hi, Alnitak~~
for me, I don't think so.
Sometimes, if you are too sincere, like what U have said, it may hurt some one by accident.
So before you say something, you must consider that weather it's OK to say.
And nomatter what to say, sincere can't be the reason to be mean.
@lilaclady (28206)
• Australia
16 May 08
I am a firm believer in honesty but I also think the other persons feelings must be taken into consideration, maybe the old saying if you can't say anything nice then don't say anything could be a good way...or if something needs to be said a kind tactful way is good...I don't believe in hurting people if possible.
@cripfemme (7698)
• United States
20 Jul 08
I try to be honest, but not cruel. I won't lie to someone and tell them I like something I don't (as in haircuts or outfits). Sometimes, however, things are just to horrible to say. I don't say those things unless my tongue overtakes my mind perhaps. That, of course, happens to me (as it does to everybody sometimes).
@thebeaddoodler (4262)
• Lubbock, Texas
16 May 08
Being sincere and being mean are two different things. I do believe in being honest, but if I can't say something honest without cutting a person down, then I believe it's best to say nothing.
