sign in • sign up
web | myLot | discussions | blogs | news | photos
homeinterestsdiscussionsblogsnewsmessages friendsphotosearningsmyLot

brothers marriage...!! email this discussion to a friend?

myLot reputation of 93/100. nupats (1350)   ranked 1 out of 81 in my brother6 months ago

this is the most sought after topic in our family and the most stressful..he has been following a very careless life so far he is roaming around with so many girls at the same time..i just dont like this way of his life...he tells everyopne of them he likes them but i know he is not serious abt them...he has told my parents tolook for a girl for him to marry now tht we have spoken to some alliances he is not intrested in mid way of talks...if we tell him anything he just sings this song:
I wanna b single again, when i am single my pockets will jingle,i wanna b single...wt do u think is he some kind of a stupid? he is so callous with his life? he is not rude but he does not take anything seriously? i take care of his funds bcoz he keeps loosing his money? when will he learn to take care of his things? are single guys like this? we all thought marriage will bring stability in his life...one moment he says yes and suddenly no? we r so confused any advice..

 
 
my brother
sponsors
Healthcare turnaround management
Focus Management Group can help with all of your hospital management consulting needs.
www.focusmg.com

Local Immigration Firm
Deportation/Appeals/Permits. Offices in Los Angeles and Long Beach.
www.eimmigration.org

Storage Containers Los Angeles, CA
Used and new steel storage containers. Ideal for on-site storage needs. All sizes available: sale, rent, refrigerated. Custom modifications. Tilt bed delivery service.
www.apstorage.com

doubloonie (304) response was accepted on 6/19/2008.
denotes best response.
tags:  marriage, brother, managing a brother, social problem, settle down
 
1. rpetro10706 (60)   ranked 67 out of 81 in my brother   6 months ago

Well to tell you the truth most people have a way about them. His ways just seem to be out spoken and to live life to the fullest. In fact he seems to also not be carring to other if he likes to jump around from girl to girl. Simply put he is not able to commit to any of this. You might even see that maybe he is the type to not commit to anything or certian things. Its just the way he is right now. He will change give it time one day reality will kick in ...


myLot reputation of 93/100. nupats (1350)   ranked 1 out of 81 in my brother  6 months ago

i think u r right in wt u said..he has tht i care a damn kind of attitude..but u know it hurts a lot at times..i think we need to leave him alone and he shud get to his senses..thank u so much

Healthcare turnaround management Focus Management Group can help with all of your hospital management consulting needs. www.focusmg.com
 
2. myLot reputation of 86/100. cryw0lf (291)   ranked 70 out of 81 in my brother   6 months ago

You need to explain he needs to grow up, start taking responsibility, does he live in the same household as you or your mother? how about kicking him out. That might knock some sense into him. Some people need harsh things to make them realize life is harder then they think. They need to think independently to become independent.


myLot reputation of 93/100. nupats (1350)   ranked 1 out of 81 in my brother  6 months ago

tht is true dear i think we need to treat him in a similar manner so tht he understands the meaning of family and loving..thank u dear..

Local Immigration Firm Deportation/Appeals/Permits. Offices in Los Angeles and Long Beach. www.eimmigration.org
 
3. myLot reputation of 86/100. rsa101 (4659)   ranked 68 out of 81 in my brother   6 months ago

Marriage will not bring stability in his life. It may create the opposite perhaps. The thing is he should learn responsibility on his own maybe during his younger years where you could still better manage him. But I guess he was brought up that way carefree and does not worry because you will provide him what he needs in life. You never allowed him to be on his own and provide for his own. I think he still could learn this thing. My first advice is let him manage his own fund and if he loses it then let him suffer for that so that he'll learn from it. Sometimes we are the ones that create a person and not the person itself.


myLot reputation of 93/100. nupats (1350)   ranked 1 out of 81 in my brother  6 months ago

Yes we all love him so much...he just uses it against us...i think we need to leave him alone and he shud get to his senses..thank u so much

Storage Containers Los Angeles, CA Used and new steel storage containers. Ideal for on-site storage needs. All sizes available: sale, rent, refrigerated. Custom modifications. Tilt bed delivery service. www.apstorage.com
 
4. myLot reputation of 89/100. KUSHANK55 (809)   ranked 71 out of 81 in my brother   6 months ago

dear nupats leave him alone .dont bother anymore for his marriage let him settle down on his own . the way you and i look at things and his viewpoint are utterly different. many in this generation will go without marriage.because of one reason or the other.some will not get the eligible girl because the sexual imbalance. and others because they dont want to be tied up with one . any way all the best.


myLot reputation of 93/100. nupats (1350)   ranked 1 out of 81 in my brother  6 months ago

hi dear we all really do not know how to handle this still as of now we just tell hm do wt u wish...i hope he realises the importance of family...thank u

thermage thermage, non surgical facelift. www.mesola.com
 
5. myLot reputation of 71/100. schummi (776)   ranked 69 out of 81 in my brother   6 months ago

Is it...its a common story in almost every household...but i think you will be risking the future of the girl...so...just first confirm it from him....becouse...just in case if something happens....he will be blaming the whole thing on you guys....


myLot reputation of 93/100. nupats (1350)   ranked 1 out of 81 in my brother  6 months ago

yes u have a point there and we really have no intention of forcing him..thanx dear..

Los Angeles Auto Rentals Auto Vans and Convertible car rentals near LAX. www.airport-rent-a-car.com
 
6. myLot reputation of 97/100. doubloonie (304)   ranked 73 out of 81 in my brother   6 months ago

Unfortunately, and this is absolutely no offense to you or your family, your brother sounds immature and doesn't really know what he wants. This doesn't make him a bad guy though. It just means he needs some growing up to do. Also unfortunately, you cannot live your brother's life for him or make him do want he does not want to do. He is an adult and is responsibility for his own choices or mistakes. I understand the love for family and the need/desire to protect them. But sometimes, I think that hinders their growth because then they always know they have someone to dig them out of the holes they create for themselves and they become a little spoiled. It's like a child who lives at home who doesn't have to pay for food, shelter, clothes, bills and who doesn't cook or do chores. This child becomes spoiled until they move out on their own. And only then do they become more mature (hopefully) and learn to appreciate how to do things for themselves and also learn to appreciate their family.

I think the only you can do is let your brother know that you love and accept whoever he is, and advised him of things he should do to lead a more responsible life. But ultimately, it is up to him to make the proper changes and grow up. Be aware though, that to him, growing up might not mean settling down ever. Some guys never want to settle down and always want to have plenty of girlfriends. There is nothing wrong with this lifestyle if he doesn't lead anybody on and doesn't make any false promises. Then the girl knows that there is no future for them and it's her decision to carry on a relationship with him or not. If this is the case with your brother, it's just something your family will have to accept and not pressure him into marriage because if he is not ready to truly settle down, it is not fair for a girl who will become devoted to him not to receive the same devotion in return.


myLot reputation of 93/100. nupats (1350)   ranked 1 out of 81 in my brother  6 months ago

yes dear u are absolutely right in what u said...my parents are so very much emotional abt him as he is the SON so they are always supporting him..i have told them to give him space and not to interfere good or bad afterall his life..thanx for writing in..


myLot reputation of 97/100. doubloonie (304)   ranked 73 out of 81 in my brother  6 months ago

Thanks for the BR, nupats! And good luck with your family situation.

Los Angeles Auto Dealers New & Used Vehicles. View Specials Online. Schedule a Test Drive. myglobalprofile.com/universal-city
 
sponsors
thermage
thermage, non surgical facelift.
www.mesola.com

Los Angeles Auto Rentals
Auto Vans and Convertible car rentals near LAX.
www.airport-rent-a-car.com

Los Angeles Auto Dealers
New& Used Vehicles. View Specials Online. Schedule a Test Drive.
myglobalprofile.com/universal-city

similar discussions
Does it seem strange for a married man to not wear his wedding band anymore?
If a married man used to wear his wedding band, but does not anymore, is that a bit odd. He says...
hear the wedding bells?
Never thought of getting married but they said that you would know if you hear wedding bells. Till...
After divorce, who should take the kids??
There could be some situations where parents need to be separated due to some serious...
single or married?
im a married person, no regret being married. But sometime, I think being single is a happy one,...
How many years,have you been Married?
I have been Married for 13 years and we aree blessed with two beautiful kids.How about you how many...
Why do couples fight so much?
We couples, past the honeymoon phase, find every issue wth the weight of the mountain. Be it the...
why do we must to be marriage?
just like that title.
Is there any website for getting good bride and bridegroom for marriage?
I have been going through couple of times just to look for profiles. Is there any good websites...
should I tell wife of job layoff?
I am working at a job know but will be layed off 1 week before christmas. I have been trying not to...
which comes first, building a house or getting marry?
i really am confuse, a friend told me that she and boyfriend will marry as soon as the house that...
sponsors
thermage
thermage, non surgical facelift.
www.mesola.com
Los Angeles Auto Rentals
Auto Vans and Convertible car rentals near LAX.
www.airport-rent-a-car.com
Los Angeles Auto Dealers
New & Used Vehicles. View Specials Online. Schedule a Test Drive.
myglobalprofile.com/universal-city
Naturalization Lawyer in Los Angeles, CA
Call now for a Naturalization Lawyer in Los Angeles, with an Immigration Attorney.
www.immigrantattorneys.com
industrial machinery
Pipe, Valve and Fitting Industry Products. See Current Projects.
www.savmach.com
Property Management
Professional Property Management with more than 30 years of experience.
www.rodincompany.com
Los Angeles Car Rental, No Airport Fees
Rent a car from 98.99/wk. Under-age, Credit, Debit and Cash Rental.
www.atwest-rentacar.com
Gazebos in Los Angeles, California
Discount pricing on Alumawood patio covers.
www.alumawoodfactorydirect.com
Planning an Occasion/Event?
The Sportsmen's Lodge Hotel in Los Angeles, CA. Plan your event at The Sportsmen's Lodge Hotel. Let our experienced and attentive Catering Staff make your special occasion memorable….
www.slhotel.com
Dusty Ducts Air Duct Cleaning Services
Dual HEPA Filtration. Free Camera Inspections. Courteous Technicians.
DustyDucts1.com