RE: I really Hate teenagers sometimes
By Erilyn
@Erilyn (3020)
United States
June 13, 2008 2:29pm CST
A few days ago I started a discussion based on something my 15 year old daughter had done. It can be found here: http://www.mylot.com/w/discussions/1553874.aspx
Why am I posting this? I have apologized for the wording of the title my of discussion many times and believe that it was also taken out of context. I was accused of being upset about someone calling me out on the word hate. I was blasted for "using the word hate to reffer to her child." this was never my intention and I would like the oppertunity to state that. After dealing with a lot of different problems I have had not only with her and some of the things she has said as well as dealing with a medical condition in which just before I wrote the orginal discussion she had stated that she wished I would hurry up and die, I needed to vent. maybe if I had worded the title I hate teenage behavior sometimes I would not have been treated as if I had said something to my daughter I should not have. Not once would I ever say something like that to my child, and the words I used as I have stated in my title were not taken as intended.
So for all of those that I offended it was not my intention for it to be taken the way it was written, and I apologize for that.
5 people like this
10 responses
@mummymo (23706)
•
17 Jun 08
Erilyn honey you did nothing to apologise for nor should you be made to feel that you should beg forgiveness or grovel on the ground to make things right! You expressed your feelings about the attitude that your daughter and teenagers in general can have and another person latched on to one word in the title and twisted your meaning to validate her own feelings about it! No more apologising sweety - there was no need in the first place! I hate teenagers too sometimes! lol Hugs xxx
1 person likes this
@mummymo (23706)
•
17 Jun 08
I am so glad to hear that! I am glad to offer support to anyone that is being bullied and put down , especially when they are in the situation you were in! Stand proud and stand tall Erilyn, you are a strong woman who is doing a great job whilst suffering from a horrible illness that would leave many of us on our knees! Kudos and love to you - I hope you know you are in my prayers! xxx
1 person likes this
@Erilyn (3020)
• United States
17 Jun 08
Thank you Mmmy, and I have decided that I will no longer apologize for something I said. Can't please everyone all of the time. I have made admends with the fact that someone took one word of what I said and used it to make me look like a horrible person. You are right I shouldn't have to apologize. Looking back on what I said and the context I said it in I said nothing out of line really. Never once did I say anything that was insuinated by her post. me bein g the person I am however, I couldn't help it at the time. We'll just blame the meds!!! lol (((((((((((hugs)))))))))))) to you as well hun!!
1 person likes this
@Erilyn (3020)
• United States
17 Jun 08
Thank you hun, all the support that I have gotten has really meant a lot to me. More than I could ever say. When I am here its great casue for just a little while I can forget somewhat about some of the things I am going through, and its great to know I have the friends here that will help me vent. ((((((((hugs))))))
1 person likes this
@fwidman (11514)
• United States
14 Jun 08
There was nothing wrong with your original post. How often do kids say they hate their parents? Too often LOL
I raised four stepsons and now am trying my best to raise one stepdaughter. I'll take the boys anytime LOL
Hang in there, Mother, her turn will come! :)
@fwidman (11514)
• United States
14 Jun 08
One more girl? Poor you! LOL The boy will drive you crazy too, but just not in the same way as the girls. The good thing about him? He won't have that PMS mood that teenage girls seem to always have (even when they aren't having their period ) LOL
1 person likes this
@sunshinedap (615)
• United States
17 Jun 08
Don't worry about it, honey. We know we love our children. The teen years are so hard and when we think about it, we didn't like our parents back in the day and they probably had times they didn't like us much either.
Being a parent today, I think, is harder than ever because we do love our kids. We all need a place to vent and if this is your place, I'm glad you have somewhere to go. Sometimes our posts sound so literal and are only taken at face value, no one can hear your tone, whether you are happy, sad, anguished, or just venting.
They don't understand that you do this here so you DON'T say anything like that to your child.
My son laughs at me because the only song I like that he likes is "Teenagers Scare The Living Sh*t Out Of Me"
@Erilyn (3020)
• United States
17 Jun 08
I am going to have to look up that song. And you have a good point! I called my mom one day and apologized for everything I ever did to her when I was a kid. She told me that for the most part I was a good kid, but then she said it was probably because if I said half the stuff my daughter says to me she would have backhanded me and I knew it!
@gabs8513 (48686)
• United Kingdom
13 Jun 08
As far as I am concerned you have no reason to apologise I have said this in the past and I do not see what is wrong with it
This Person is out of order for creating so much grief over it
So do not worry over it any more everyone who reads the Discussion properly will understand how you meant it
And your Daughter was out of order to say what she did that was very harsh
No one had the right to judge you as it is clear in the Discussion what you meant
@Angelwhispers (8978)
• United States
15 Jun 08
Personally I do not think there is any reason for you to continue to apoligize for such a small infraction. Those critics of yours based their opinion on the opinion of one very small minded woman. They did not read your original post. There are some people who will cut down another person in the hopes of elevating themselves. Some how if gives them a false sense of power and grandeur. Just know Erilyn that we are here to support you in the present and in the coming months when I know things will get more difficult for you. Never think you have to walk on egg shells in your posts. You vent away as you see fit.
1 person likes this
@dont_pick_your_nose (2279)
• Australia
14 Jun 08
Sometimes you need to be respective of the way you express you opinions. I am not offended by your comments. but sont think it is nice to tell anyone you hate them let alone, have this be your own daughter. i think repharsing your words will help for the backlash.
1 person likes this
@mummymo (23706)
•
17 Jun 08
I think you were distracted by someone picking their nose dont_pick_your_nose! Erilyn never told anyone she hated them, she used I hate teenagers sometimes as a title in her discussion and the only backlash has been from one person who latched on to that word in her title and did not read the discussion properly! She never told her daughter she hated her , she never told anyone else that - she simply used a title that many people understand! xxx
1 person likes this
@palonghorn (5479)
• United States
13 Jun 08
I read your discussion, and after going through the teenage years twice, I have two daughters, I took your title just as you meant it.......I also hated teens (their behavior that is) In reading your discussion, not once did it ever cross my mind that you hated your daughter or that you had ever said that to her. I mean come on people, how many discussions on here could you deal the author misery on if you took any one part of it out of context??? To you Erilyn........I would have probably stated it the same exact way, and I love my daughters more than life, and would never tell them I hated them. However, I have told them I hated a particular behavior they were exhibiting. For those of you who don't read clearly..I said I hated their behavior NOT THEM.
1 person likes this
@Erilyn (3020)
• United States
13 Jun 08
Thank you for your support. I am glad you took it as it was meant and not me saying I hated my daughter. Whats funny is that my daughter took the title just as it was meant also. I don't often let her on the pc anymore, (she got into too much trouble) But this was something I did want her to see. At 15 she did not take it as I hated her just the behavior that she had. Oh Well can't please everyone!
@ersmommy1 (12587)
• United States
14 Jun 08
I responded to your original post. I don't think you have anything to apologize for.
1 person likes this
@fiona08 (454)
• United States
13 Jun 08
People get bent out of shape over nothing! Everyone ought to pick up on the tongue in cheek manner in which the word is used. I absolutely adore children! I am usually boring people with the countless little humorous tales I have from encounters with them. However, now and then, I have been heard to declare sarcastically that I can't stand kids. Anyone with any sense knows this is not an actual declaration! Come on people, lighten up! She didn't say to her daughter, "I hate you." She used a generic phrase to describe the generic resentment of typical, generic teen behavior. Haven't we all felt that way before?
1 person likes this
@Erilyn (3020)
• United States
13 Jun 08
Thank you Fiona for taking it as it was intended. My grandfather used to say all the time I hate kids, then call me over to color, or help him pick colors for a sign he was designing. When he wrote his biography he had 2 pages dedicated to talking about me. I think what I had written was taken too literally. While I probably should have phrased it better, I didn't think so many people would take it the wrong way.
@rantingqueen (495)
• United States
13 Jun 08
Erilyn, I read your original thread right now and do not feel that you were out of line or out of place. Our children and their behavioral traits are sometimes the most annoying, frustrating times we will live through. You did the appropriate thing by not accepting her behavior and not allowing it to continue in front of her friend.
My mom listens to me tell her the stories of the things my kids have done to annoy me and she laughs. She then tells me that grandkids are a parents revenge. One day, we will get to enjoy telling our kids that!
1 person likes this
@Erilyn (3020)
• United States
13 Jun 08
Thank you, I called my mom and apologized to her for everything I ever did as a teenager. She said she would not trade places with me for anything. She said now a days kids are getting more and more like this and harder to deal with. I know I wouldn't want to be a teenager now lol.
