Discipline is not a dirty word.

Interesting conversation that you have started here. I think it is good that you are thinking of things like this even though you haven't had children yet.

A lot of people just jump in, have the kids, and then are like oh what do we do when this happens. And I do understand there is no guide or instruction booklet when it comes to kids. Plus they are all different, just as we are all different in our own little way.

But, like I said, I just wanted to said good for you for considering such things at such an early stage. I think you have some great ideas.

You do what is effective for that child. While I don't agree with the opinion of some that spanking is abuse, it is not affective.
I don't ground but I have taken away privileges.
You never punish for mistakes or accidents. That is how children learn. You never punish for telling the truth or you will make liars out of your children.
Discipline should only be done when the child knows it was wrong.

To most people, there is quite a fine line between discipline and abuse. Well, when I have my first child, I'd apply what was taught to me when I was a kid. I find it successful in our family. I usually call it "consequence management".

It is very much the same as what you have mentioned. As punishment, taking away privileges depending on the gravity of the action is effective. The child will learn basically what is wrong and gauge which action/s deserve consequence. Like playing video games for example, they usually play for an hour a day, depending on the action, I could cut them off for a day or even a couple of days.

Going too far is to inflict severe physical pain to the point where the child is already seeing it as harmful rather than consequential. This goes the same with emotional consequence as well such as shouting and swearing. Nevertheless, there are lots of ways instill discipline. Some may or may not work per family but it is best to at least try and find an effective way. Have a great day!

I have two little girls, one of them is old enough to be disiplined the other is not. One is three the other is two months old. I beleived the same way before I had kids. The truth is, I think that is a wonderful idea, but you'll have to roll with the punches. I said I would never spank my child, or put my child in time out, or do anything like that. Punishment is not always a one way street. I have taken away my daughters toys and she just laughed and played with something else. Don't underestimate the power of a young mind. If you take away their favorite toy, they'll just find a new one. I don't mean to rain on your parade, I'm just advising that it will take a lot of trial and error to figure out what the kid needs for positive or negative reinforcement.

discipline is a good world, and its meanning is also very very nice ..

as has been mentioned on a number of posts,yes,it is always a good idea to look ahead,but you really will need to keep an open mind on physical punishment for serious problems.
running out into traffic for one,this they must learn fast is somthing they must not do,and once they know that certain things brings certain punishment,it can take it's time to learn not to do it,but with the road,they need to know fast,so a good swat on the tail-end,and if it is done only with serious mistakes will hold.
now for another area,have you discussed fully on the type of diapers you will use?
If you wish to save money,use disposables for no more than one year and then go to cloth,this will help with potty training faster and save many thousands of dollars over the total time they are in diapers/training pants.
Many Blessings to you.

Hi,
I´m 63 years old and live in Chile. When I was a child, and when my girls were children (they are now 40ish)nobody thought it was a great punishment to give the child a slap on the butt if he/she wasn´t behaving.
Sometimes we told the girls to go to their rooms, somtimes we would take away a privilege. It depended on what they had done.
My children learned how to be corteous and they also knew that to have rights they had to be responsible.
I don´t believe in rewarding a child for behaving well. That´s what he is supposed to do. But playing with one´s child is a reward for the parents. My parents played with me, my husband and I played with our children.
Still there was a line they knew they d better not cross.

wow, great plan there SomeCowgirl, I have no kids but when I was growing up every time we will violate rules, dad and mom will talk to us and do valuing a lot! No punishment at all...and reward also is given every time we will do good things!

hi dear somecowgirl
discipline is a good royal word. every thing is right which is disciplined.
if the sun appears in away which can be termed indisciplined, like you and me used to arrive at my college missing classes, days on hiking, how it will be total anarchy.
this is the importance of discipline in our lives.
and one learns it earlier the better.

Usually I will give warning before they are grounded. They will do chores like wash their own cup after drinking and fold their own clothing etc. If they behave well they can sleep a hour later or watch cartoon for an extra hour.