Have you embraced "Panda-Shui" in the home? Good fortune's there for the taking!
By James72
@James72 (26790)
Australia
January 5, 2009 3:47am CST
Forget Feng-Shui as this can be a very complicated approach and quite difficult to follow. The important thing to focus on these days is "Panda-Shui", which is a far simpler approach with unrivalled results. By embracing Panda-Shui, we empower universal chakra's around us and invite good will, good fortune and great success into our lives! Let me share a few tips to help you establish a Panda-Shui mentality in your home and your life in general:
- Panda enclosures must have all growing bamboo leaning in a north westerly direction. This attracts universal goodness down each stalk from top to bottom like a natural conduit of sorts. The goodness will enter the surrounding earth and flow throughout your location.
- When you spank your panda, the hand must slap at a perfect 45 degree angle. This pushes away all negative karma prior to contact. If you get the spanking angle wrong, you will actually drive negative energy INTO the panda's butt.
- The tail area of the panda must always be kept free of any build-up. Tail build-up is kinda like a welcome mat for negativity. A clean tail area invites clean energy!
- Place a map of China in the western corner of the enclosure to relieve the panda of any negative homesickness energy.
- Buy four DVD Collector's Edition's of "Kung-Fu Panda" and bury one in each corner of the panda enclosure. Combined they will fight darkness and despair.
You woe it to yourself and the panda to embrace Panda-Shui. A happy panda is a willingly spankable panda, so don't slack off now! These are a few tips for you all that will practically change your life and the life of your panda. Please feel free to share any others I may have missed. 
7 people like this
10 responses
@mimpi1911 (25464)
• India
5 Jan 09
Oh great! How have you enlightened me just at the right moment when I was striving for direction! Thanks James. I will ever be indebted to you. I am much relieved now. But I have a few questions:
1. Panda enclosures must have all growing bamboo....: Will it affect if i make it on north west, Total noryh is blocked in my place.
2. When you spank your panda, the hand must slap at a perfect 45 degree angle.....How can I make sure that its but 45 degree? I do not want further negative energy in my house.
3. Place a map of China in the western corner of the enclosure....Can I keep it on east? I wake up to a China map everyday to set my goal right.
4. Buy four DVD Collector's Edition's of "Kung-Fu Panda" and bury....Do you mean oroginal DVD or writing would do. In this economic slump I do have take care of my budget.
If you could expedite and enlighten me, I would stat to set things up on my home. I do not want to delay. It's Panda Shui afterall!
3 people like this
@mimpi1911 (25464)
• India
5 Jan 09
Thanks so very much for your valuable advice Mr. James.
I just got through some old protractor to start with. I do hope to do 45 without it soon though. Does it take long? Can I grasp the angle faster by any other means?
The only thing I need to work on is the Map of China thing. It takes awa6y my heart to remove it from that wall! But I have to 0 anything to Panda Shui. Just anything.
2 people like this
@grandpa_lash (5225)
• Australia
5 Jan 09
Just a quick question.
"Panda enclosures must have all growing bamboo leaning in a north westerly direction"
Does this also apply in the southern hemisphere, or should we follow the normal neo-pagan habit of reversing polarities (such as Earth in the north of the circle rather tna the south)?
Otherwise I consider you advice to be deep, meaningful, and wise, oh sensei.
Lash
PS It's such a pity pandas aren't Japanese lol, with my fascination for the Rising Sun.
3 people like this
@James72 (26790)
• Australia
5 Jan 09
Jeez Lash, talk about giving my brain a work-out! lol. I have given your question some considerable thought and have come to the conclusion that yes, some adjustments for the Southern Hemisphere are acceptable. For all regions south of the equator, a south eastern lean may be effected. 
I would try to teach your Panda some Geisha principles if I were you Lash. It may be a very interesting outcome if you are able to create a Chinese/Japanese cultural behaviour hybrid! Leave a copy of the DVD "Seven Samurai" in the enclosure and see how the panda reacts. This should be a pretty good litmus test you would think. Good luck!
I would try to teach your Panda some Geisha principles if I were you Lash. It may be a very interesting outcome if you are able to create a Chinese/Japanese cultural behaviour hybrid! Leave a copy of the DVD "Seven Samurai" in the enclosure and see how the panda reacts. This should be a pretty good litmus test you would think. Good luck!2 people like this
@James72 (26790)
• Australia
6 Jan 09
This is quite uncanny Lash as I was actually going to mention the "Art of War' by Sun Tzu instead of Seven Samurai, but I changed my mind at the last minute because I thought that Seven Samurai had a better chance of being known by anyone that happened to read the comments! 
(Cue the Twilight Zone music)
(Cue the Twilight Zone music)2 people like this
@grandpa_lash (5225)
• Australia
6 Jan 09
Well; that's alright then. I will take your advice on Seven Samurai, and since I am hoping my panda will become a good guard panda, I might also put a copy of Sun Tzu in there as well.
If I succeed with teaching him, or his soon-to-be mate geisha principles, I may even consider a geisha school for pandas, plus possibly a Guard Panda Training establishment.
Lash
3 people like this
@alokn99 (5717)
• India
5 Jan 09
Why does Panda spanking have to get so complicated ? Why can't i just spank the Panda and get done with it ?
On the other hand what a wonderful idea now that it's Panda awareness week. Get some more literature on it James. We need some brochures, some leaflets and even a book written and signed by you.
Let me try out some of these suggestions of Panda-Shui and lets see the results. Positive and encouraging i hope.
@James72 (26790)
• Australia
6 Jan 09
From my own experiences, bamboo incense doesn't burn too well Alok, so I would skip that I think. Given the energy levels of the panda, there is also a strong chance that they will knock it over and burn down the enclosure too! 
Fencing however is perfectly fine of course but must be reinforced with wire behind it as the panda will just eat through it and possibly escape. A slight north western lean to all fencing is important also. As for panda poo, collect it, bag it; and place it anywhere outside the home you wish for luck to be attracted.
Fencing however is perfectly fine of course but must be reinforced with wire behind it as the panda will just eat through it and possibly escape. A slight north western lean to all fencing is important also. As for panda poo, collect it, bag it; and place it anywhere outside the home you wish for luck to be attracted. 1 person likes this
@James72 (26790)
• Australia
5 Jan 09
This is purely a suggestion Alok to increase a panda spanker's chances of success in 2009 and beyond and is not a must-do. Plain old spanking will serve us all well, no question! But every little bit extra helps I am sure. And yes, it IS Panda Spanking Awareness week, so no is as good a time to share this knowledge as any I reckon. 
I will have to check the archives for the written materials you have requested, so bear with me on that one. (Panda Bear that is!) Try these base tips and watch 2009 unfold with beauty like a lotus flower. Time is of the essence my friend and Panda-Shui is the enlightened way of the future! 
I will have to check the archives for the written materials you have requested, so bear with me on that one. (Panda Bear that is!) Try these base tips and watch 2009 unfold with beauty like a lotus flower. Time is of the essence my friend and Panda-Shui is the enlightened way of the future! 2 people like this
@cyberfluf (4996)
• Netherlands
5 Jan 09
James, how could your forget the ever so important yoga ritual you have to go through with your panda to make it calm and zen? A panda that has peace and is balanced with his innercentre will not tip over when you give him a good spank, whilst panda's who aren't centered will have a harder time keeping up.
It will also strenghten various muscles, so beware for panda's spanking back! Keep them happy!
2 people like this
@cyberfluf (4996)
• Netherlands
5 Jan 09
Ah, so that's what the downward bear is! I was wondering about it but I couldn't quite get it right yet. So yet another question solved and other enlightment on both sides, James. Thank you and have a pandariffic evening!
2 people like this
@James72 (26790)
• Australia
5 Jan 09
I got so caught up in the practical aspects, I completely ignored the fundamentals cyberfluf! Thank God I have you to reiterate the basics! Their favourite Yoga position is the "Downward Dog" by the way, but they really get excited when you refer to it as the "Downward Bear" instead. I have to head off to bed now, so have a great evening with your centred zen panda! 2 people like this
@sharra1 (6340)
• Australia
5 Jan 09
Ah is that why some pandas fall over when spanked. I had wondered about that very strange occurrence. I have never had a panda try and spank back although my female panda does like to spank the boy pandas to keep them in line.
She has them well in hand these days and they wait on her hand and foot. It is amusing to watch them together.
3 people like this
@riyasam (16556)
• India
5 Jan 09
that is a good idea,james,but my problem is i live in an apartment and i cannot afford to have enclosures there
,without creating a scene with my neighbours.at present,i have to stay put with my wall enclosures
.as there are about 3 pandas at my place(do tell me,if i make any sense)
,without creating a scene with my neighbours.at present,i have to stay put with my wall enclosures .as there are about 3 pandas at my place(do tell me,if i make any sense)2 people like this
@James72 (26790)
• Australia
5 Jan 09
The "enclosure" as such can also be representational riya! Growing bamboo can be a potted plant variety only for example. The DVD burying (Or movie posters as I have shared with mimpi) can be placed on each of the 4 walls instead; the spanking technique can be embraced regardless; and keeping the panda's butt area clean is a general responsibility of us all anyways! Regardless of the space concerned, there are always alternatives, so don't worry! Thanks for bringing up non-enclosure type questions as I am sure there will be many others with similar circumstances.
Regardless of the space concerned, there are always alternatives, so don't worry! Thanks for bringing up non-enclosure type questions as I am sure there will be many others with similar circumstances. 2 people like this
@sharra1 (6340)
• Australia
5 Jan 09
Interesting concept James, spanking negative energy into Pandas. I wonder what effect that would have on them. They might go on a rampage?
I always keep my panda's tail clean. My pandas take great care of their appearance. I am not sure about our bamboo since I have no direction sense and have no idea which way is north etc.
As to the dvd's, if I bury them in the enclosure the Pandas just dig them up and watch them. They do not listen to me when I tell them not to do this. Not even when spank them.
@James72 (26790)
• Australia
6 Jan 09
There is really very little in this world more counterproductive than pandering to panda's sharra. Thank goodness you are both wise enough to realize this as things could have gotten WAY out of hand otherwise! We are fast approaching 400 panda spankers on mylot now too, so this knowledge is good to share. Panda spanking is a wonderful pursuit no question, but great frivolity requires equal amounts of responsibility. We shall teach them well.
We are fast approaching 400 panda spankers on mylot now too, so this knowledge is good to share. Panda spanking is a wonderful pursuit no question, but great frivolity requires equal amounts of responsibility. We shall teach them well. 1 person likes this
@grandpa_lash (5225)
• Australia
6 Jan 09
My normal response to a panda seeking to be pandered to is to make the little blighter stand in the south-east corner of his enclosure reciting 1000 times, "I will not try to top from the bottom, I will not try to top from the bottom, I will not ....."
It usually cures them for, oh, hours.
Lash
2 people like this
@mtdewgurl74 (18151)
• United States
23 Jun 09
Sounds like I need to start planting me some Bamboo before it is to late. Ok..Used my husband carpenter square to get the perfect angle..for slapping. Writes store list..have to get Charmin..since it says it leaves less lint behind..or so the commercials says. Alrighty then DVD's are added to list as is the map of china..although a few posters wouldn't be so bad either and a big full length mirror so the panda won't be so lonely and think they are the only one that is getting spanked......What about a few CD's of sounds of China..
...What about a few CD's of sounds of China..1 person likes this
@mtdewgurl74 (18151)
• United States
25 Jun 09
Sounds of China..the nature version is what I meant..like the birds,bugs,insects,other animals and the winds in the trees..things like that.
1 person likes this
@James72 (26790)
• Australia
23 Jun 09
I reckon you should start planning ASAP Becca, 'cos this will be a nice addition to all that good mylot Karma you have. The mirror is a great idea too as it not only gives the panda the impression that there's another panda there, it can make the enclosure seem bigger too. I'd be interested to know what "sounds of China" are like as well? lol.
The mirror is a great idea too as it not only gives the panda the impression that there's another panda there, it can make the enclosure seem bigger too. I'd be interested to know what "sounds of China" are like as well? lol.
@thebohemianheart (8827)
• United States
6 Jan 09
You woe it to yourself? *LMSAO* You WOE it to yourself? Really?
Ok, all rules of Panda-Shui executed to a tee, and I am ready for the fortune and good will panda spanking to begin.
What next, Boss?
1 person likes this
@James72 (26790)
• Australia
6 Jan 09
Oh blow it out ya butt Diddly. I am getting tag-teamed by both you AND Irish on that one. lol. I am happy to see that you put all of these plans into action so quickly. It shall fare you well I am sure. What's next? Work hard, have faith, BELIEVE in everything wonderful and then brace yourself for all the goodness that's comin'! Oooh yeah, Year of the Panda!
I am getting tag-teamed by both you AND Irish on that one. lol. I am happy to see that you put all of these plans into action so quickly. It shall fare you well I am sure. What's next? Work hard, have faith, BELIEVE in everything wonderful and then brace yourself for all the goodness that's comin'! Oooh yeah, Year of the Panda! 1 person likes this
@thebohemianheart (8827)
• United States
6 Jan 09
Hey, I didn't see Irish's response. I came in, read your part, answered and went away........kind of.*L* You KNOW it is my job to catch you on these things, what are you getting pissy with me for!?*LOL*
1 person likes this
@thebohemianheart (8827)
• United States
6 Jan 09
Honey, if I didn't pick on you, you'd think I was sick, or mad at you, or something. I can't have people thinking I am not me, now can I?*L*
1 person likes this
@SaintAnne (5453)
• United States
5 Jan 09
So do I spank the panda with my westerly or easterly hand?
Do we need to buy Kung Fu Panda or is it okay to just "borrow" them for a year from other people?
I can only think of one Panda-shui tip:
Have the panda go around the house in a panda-monium and by the time it is all over, that should be the panda-design of your house allowing for some more panda-shui into your house and hearts. If you move a thing at all, negativity will be awaiting for you.
@James72 (26790)
• Australia
5 Jan 09
Any hand is fine as it's the spanking angle that matters! And I wouldn't be borrowing Kung Fu Panda from other people either if I were you SaintAnne. We are burying them remember! These people may get a tad upset if you go and bury their stuff! The last tip is an important one too actually. Kinda like a bull in a china shop, but positive! I can't think of any better home decorator than a pandamonius critter on the loose. And yes, leave things as they lie. There is method in panda madness and some things need to just be as they are, even if they DO seem oddly placed.
The last tip is an important one too actually. Kinda like a bull in a china shop, but positive! I can't think of any better home decorator than a pandamonius critter on the loose. And yes, leave things as they lie. There is method in panda madness and some things need to just be as they are, even if they DO seem oddly placed. 2 people like this
@SaintAnne (5453)
• United States
6 Jan 09
Oh, we are burying them? I somehow missed that part. I am definitely borrowing others' dvds then for that.
@sunil_008 (1269)
• India
6 Jan 09
i am also a panda is it also applied to me. but since i have no tail and no claws i think i only bring good will and good fortune to people. as i have bad quality is my razor sharp tounge which sometimes spits acids. but that too with some very serious cause. otherwise i am as kool as panda. the panda-sui that you have been telling us is sounds though very interesting but from where i would arrange the bamboos i wonder i have to look for them near the woods area. anyway if it is really an effective one then i think someday i will try. when i think nothing is going to help me out my regime back...:) thanks for sharing
1 person likes this
@James72 (26790)
• Australia
6 Jan 09
We are ALL panda's deep within sunil, so good for you for being one of the ones to recognize this! The best thing about these tips concerning bamboo, is that bamboo will grow pretty much anywhere! Yes, these approaches can benefit us all and attract great prosperity into our lives. Couple these practices with the fun, frivolity, inanity and insanity of panda spanking and 2009 can and will be one heck of a great year! Happy New Year, Happy Year of the Panda and thank you for your comments.
The best thing about these tips concerning bamboo, is that bamboo will grow pretty much anywhere! Yes, these approaches can benefit us all and attract great prosperity into our lives. Couple these practices with the fun, frivolity, inanity and insanity of panda spanking and 2009 can and will be one heck of a great year! Happy New Year, Happy Year of the Panda and thank you for your comments.