The Central Committee to The People of the United States of America...  |
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|  You can't have the car you want, you have to buy the cars we want available to you. It doesn't matter that the best selling vehicles in the US are full size pick up trucks, it is our opinion that those aren't he cars you really want to own.
We have taken surveys across the United States, and the people at Earth Day Celebrations and Phish Reunion Tour concerts make it clear that America wants cars that only hold 2 people, get 50 miles to the gallon and only go as far as the closest means of mass transportation.
There were some surprises in our survey. For instance, we had no idea that America is so interested in hemp burning vehicles. Or that so many Americans are so dedicated to conservation that only 1 or 2% of you take showers more than once a week or so.. we thought we were the only ones that dedicated to water conservation.
We were also surprised to learn that most Americans have already quit their day jobs and really don't want to go back. In light of your new found freedom, we have decided to establish, The Department of Environmental Activities Department/Headquarters of Earth Day... or D.E.A.D/H.E.A.D.
You'll be happy to learn of our next plan to make your life more full of daisies and bubbles...
We're sending our survey team to Little Five Points in Atlanta to organize a task force on National Defense!
Peace Love Dope!
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1.  AngryKittyMSV (1913)
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3 years ago
| |  Brilliant! If it weren't so close to the sad truth it would be even funnier. Well done, Ted.
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2.  anniepa (11663)
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3 years ago
| |  I happen to like the idea of giving people a voucher to get rid of their clunker if they want or need to! Anyway, we're on opposite ends of the political spectrum, Ted, but this is good, I have to admit it. I have to assure you, though, that liberal as I may be and as concerned for our environment I STILL shower every single day! Also, I NEED a car that holds more than two people because I haul my grandkids and sometimes a friend or two to the local pool everyday in the summer time.
Annie
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| ParaTed2k (6353)
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3 years ago
| | Well, I have been in the crowd of both Phish and Gratful Dead concerts, and my record is 2 1/2 weeks without a shower... hmmmm ;~D
Oh, and I did spend the early 70s riding around Europe in a VW bus, listening to the likes of The Doors, The Who, The Stones and Herb Albert....
Double hmmmmmm ;~D | | | |
| anniepa (11663)
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3 years ago
| | Herb Alpert???
That reminds me of the old Sesame Street bit about "Which one of these is not like the other, which one of these is not the same?" Now I have that jingle in my head...lol!
You can tell how I spent the seventies!
Annie | | | |
| ParaTed2k (6353)
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3 years ago
| | Want to hear a funny story about "one of these things is not like the other?" | | | |
| anniepa (11663)
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3 years ago
| | Sure, I'm always looking for funny stories!
Annie | | | |
| ParaTed2k (6353)
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3 years ago
| | Ok, but I warned you! ;~D
A few years ago we were on leave, visiting my family in Utah. My wife and kids, folks and siblings were all sitting in the backyard talking about what things were like when we were growing up.
My sister and I talked about how we shared a bed until she turned about 10... and grew out of having her brother invading her privacy.
Memories started coming back of songs we sang, stories we read and made up to tell each other and games we played before falling asleep.
I remembered that song from Sesame Street and started talking about playing it as a game.. then my dad broke in joking...
"You better not have been playing 'One of these things is not like the other!"
I don't think any of us have stopped laughing about that since! :~D | | | |
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3.  katran (321)
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3 years ago
| |  This post contains content of a mature nature. You must be Signed in or Registered to have the option to view this content.
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| ParaTed2k (6353)
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3 years ago
| | Mental note... stay off of I-59 for the next 4 years. | | | |
 ladyluna (2495)
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3 years ago
| |  This certainly looks like a BR to me!
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| 4. ladyluna (2495)
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3 years ago
| | Hey there ParaTed,
So, will it be a requirement that all D.E.A.D./H.E.A.D. employees are tax delinquent? | | | | | | |
| ParaTed2k (6353)
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3 years ago
| | But of course, that's the second requirement. The first would be enjoying an afternoon at PETA headquarters killing puppies. ;~D | | | |
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| 5. jonesy123 (3256)
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3 years ago
| |  ROFL, I have tears in my eyes I'm laughing so hard. Thanks, I needed that. This is really good and with the unfortunate base of truth to it. It will be interesting to see how far we really will be pushed into this direction.
And I guess I have to tie my kids to the roof or I can't take them anywhere...;)
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| ParaTed2k (6353)
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3 years ago
| | Sadly, all good humor has a sting of truth. | | | |
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